should I ask him if he wants to be a part of our childs life.. after he told me he cheated and doesnt ever want to see me

Sarah - posted on 03/24/2013 ( 4 moms have responded )

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im 3 months pregnant and I recently found out my now x boyfriend cheated on me with escorts and his ex girl friend. He does know im pregnant we tried to get pregnant. The day I found out about everything he has done he said he doesnt care if he ever sees me again and he hasnt even bothered to call or email once since I found out. what do I do? do I email him and ask if he wants to be a part of the babys life or just let it go? Im extremley hurt he has let his family brain wash him and his father paid for the escorts. His mother says all kinds of horrible things about me.The reason I say email is for the fact he doesnt have a cell phone and I have no idea where he even is.. I really need some help on this...

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~♥Little Miss - posted on 03/24/2013

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I would really not want anything to do with this man. You can certainly let him know you are pregnant, I think that is the right thing to do, but drop it after that. Figure out what you will do if he contacts you. He sounds awful.

Ev - posted on 03/24/2013

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He should definitely know he is a father-to-be. I would not just send it in an email. I would send it registered letter to know he got it. Take it one step at a time. If he shows any interest, do not keep him from being in the child's life at all. A child needs both parents no matter how bad or good that parent is. Eventually that child will decide where that parent fits in their life if at all. Once you do have the baby, get paternal testing done to establish him as the father and then take him to court for child support. Also set up visits as well. This keeps you safe from him trying to threaten taking the baby from you for any number of reasons. It also establishes boundries he can not cross and if so its in contempt of the custody order.

Dove - posted on 03/28/2013

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As long as he knows you are pregnant (and an approximate due date) and knows how to contact you.... I think I'd leave it. Once the baby is born get a custody, visitation, and child support order put in place. Then it's on him whether or not he has a relationship with his child. You might email him once the baby is born to give him the 'stats'. You are only 3 months pregnant, so there's a chance he might still come around for the child before he/she is born.

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Sarah - posted on 03/24/2013

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he knows im pregnant.. we tried to get pregnant and he did all this.. he up and left twice without even telling me. I would never say he cant see the baby but i dont think he really cares. the only reason i say email is because he has no cell phone and i dont know where he even is.

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