Should we have sympathy for the girl who faked cancer?

Jaime - posted on 08/11/2010 ( 26 moms have responded )




Hundreds of charitable people have been duped into donating money to a woman who allegedly faked a cancer diagnosis—but some people on Facebook are saying she should be forgiven.

Ashley Anne Kirilow, 23, of Burlington, Ont., who will appear in court today on fraud charges, reportedly claimed that she had breast cancer, brain cancer, liver cancer stomach cancer and ovarian cancer in various combinations, even going so far as to shave her head and pluck her eyebrows and eyelashes to appear as though she’d been through chemo.

Friends and family held benefits to raise money to help her through her illness and she started a charity on Facebook called “Change for a Cure,” claiming she was raising money for cancer research. But Kirilow has admitted to the Toronto Star that she did not have cancer at all and that she has spent the money she raised. Volunteers for her charity say that she raised about $20,000, but Kirilow says it was no more than $4,000, reports the Star.

Kirilow told the Star that she is sorry for what she has done and blames a difficult childhood for her behaviour. Indeed she should be very sorry. But should we view this scheme as a cry for help or a straight-up con? Members on the “Change for a Cure” Facebook page have opened up discussions about what Kirlow has done—some are outraged, calling Kirilow “useless waist [sic] of space.” But others are surprisingly compassionate. “I feel all she wanted was attention, and did what she thought was right to gain it… let's not let hate and anger eat at our souls,” says member Moustafa Sayegh in a post on the group's discussion board.

What do you think? Was this a cry for help from a troubled girl or a scam by a clever grifter?

I've been watching the news a lot more lately...probably because all of my shows are still on summer hiatus, but this story came up a couple days ago and I just thought I would share.

I'm not sure what to think at this point, so I thought I might get your perspective...


Gina - posted on 08/12/2010




Would she still be sorry if she didn't get caught? She lied and cheated about the one thing that always touches so many people.Having a bad childhood doesn't excuse the fact that she's a lying cheating b****t! I agree with Louise, make her work in a cancer ward,.Feel sorry for her? Hell no I want to show her my 12 year old cousin who's fighting cancer, let her spend a week with him in treatment then she'll know what sorry is.

Jenni - posted on 08/12/2010




How is having a troubled childhood a justifiable excuse? I'm sure most serial killers had a difficult childhood! Should we say awwww poor guy his dad was a drunk who hit him, he just needs councilling. Let's take pity on him for murdering those 30 women. There are PLENTY of people who can say they had a difficult childhood and who don't commit crimes. I have no pitty for her, she's an adult and knows what she did was wrong but did it anyways.

C. - posted on 08/11/2010




I don't have time to read any of that.. But just going off of the title.. No, we shouldn't have sympathy for ANYONE who fakes ANY illness. I think it's disgusting that people do stuff like that.

There are too many people that are really going through some kind of illness that really do need help. This is not the first time someone has done this. If people keep doing this, eventually no one will want to give to charities for fear that they aren't really real in the first place. She deserves jail time, no doubt. I hope they don't take this lightly at all.

Louise - posted on 08/11/2010




Lets face it ladies this girl is a thief of the worst kind playing on emotions of others to obtain cash. As for the "had a difficult childhood" absolute bull there are people who have had severe sexual abuse and been violently attacked and they don't go around with the wow is me hat. This girl should be punished by being made to work on a cancer word at her local hospital so she can see first hand the agony and emotional termoil a cancer patient has day to day. I lost my sister in law at 32 to skin cancer and I always donate to cancer charities to think that that money was going to fund a greedy individual for her own use makes my blood boil. Forgive let her show how sorry she is by being some help to those that need it.

Stifler's - posted on 08/12/2010




Unbelievable. What's more unbelievable is that people would believe a "difficult childhood" is an excuse to be a fuck head and get away with it.

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[deleted account]

I do in me hole as we say in Ireland feel sorry for her.Shes a scam artist and she plays on peoples emotions very well.I hope this women gets everything she deserves and having a bad childhood isn't a good enough excuse..mine wasnt Rosie and i would never be a liar and scam anyone even a bit let alone to the full extent she went to ..she know full well what she was doing and the only thing she feels sorry for is yourself..GETTING CAUGHT OUT.

*Lisa* - posted on 08/12/2010




I like what Toni said also. It's a horrible thing to do. She is a con artist for sure and doesn't deserve sympathy. She can blame it on her rough childhood but there are plenty of people who have rough childhood's that don't do things like this. She exploited a very serious illness for personal gain. Yuck. But I think if she shows remorse and changes, she can earn back her trust.

[deleted account]

I have NO sympathy for this woman! I could care less how sorry her childhood was, or wasn't! You need to step above the people that shit on you, not step to their level or exceed it!

On another note, my uncle actually told everyone he had cancer...I'm thinking prostate, but it wasn't??? Anyhow, the cancer was a crappy one where some 5% of ppl survive because it is often caught late. He even told ppl he had 6 mos to live! ALL of this w/out ever going to a doctor...he had NO diagnosis, but succeeded in scaring the shit out of everyone! He was drunk and was having health issues so he just assumed...pancreatic cancer maybe? He eventually told everyone the truth, and we were able to forgive him and look past his issues as he was going through ALOT at the time...BUT he did not try scaming anyone out of money! Maybe tried getting his wife who walked out on him to feel sorry for him enough to take him back...but whatever? (it worked BTW, she took him back...rediculous!)

[deleted account]

Sharon, I want to thank you and apologize for stealing (or adopting as I like to think of it) your word!


Bout sums up my thoughts today!

[deleted account]

BAHAHA! I may just need to call you...ACK! I'm feeling so argumentative and there's a few people in a thread in PDHT that are driving me BATTY, CRAZY...right around the bend.

Lyndsay - posted on 08/11/2010




I say a little from column A and a little from column B. She is obviously an excellent scammer... I've seen some manipulative people in action (my own mother poses as a nurse in almost all hospital situations, like the births of her grandchildren) but this just takes the cake. I think to go to the extents that she went to to validate her story, like shaving her head and plucking out her eyebrows, theres obviously something not quite right there.

As for the "bad childhood" excuse. This is such a cop-out and a lame excuse, it really makes me want to slap people. There are many people out there who have struggled through their early lives who manage to get their shit together and succeed at life later on.

Jessica - posted on 08/11/2010




haha, oh geez, no, no sympathy...not everyone has an illness, some people are just shitty people, this sounds like one of those cases.

[deleted account]

This woman conned people into donating money to her by pretending to have an illness that many of us have experience of in some way. She played on peoples emotions and abused the trust given to her by the people donating. A difficult childhood is no excuse to being a despicable woman!

I think all people who cry wolf deserve to be punished incredibly harshly because they make people cynical and reduces the help that true suffers get. I agree with Louise and Dana AFTER she has been to jail she should be made to do community service on a cancer ward to see the true suffering the disease brings - to not only the patients but to all around them!

She deserves nothing BUT has the right to earn her forgiveness.

Charlie - posted on 08/11/2010




There has to be something wrong with her .............thats more than your everyday con artist , its sick.

[deleted account]

It makes me wonder if her "difficult childhood" is another con to gain sympathy after the fact? Never cry wolf!

[deleted account]

IF, and that's a big, IFFFF.....why did she spend the money? The fact that the money has already been spent leads me to believe it was a malice con. SHAME ON HER!

She needs help AFTER she goes to jail!

~♥Little Miss - posted on 08/11/2010




It was a cry for help, and a scam. She stole money in a melodramatic fasion. I know a women that is truly on her 3rd round of chemo in 2 years, and it breaks my heart. The cancer is extremely aggressive. I have no sympathy for this out right liar. Why should I? Just becouse she is messed up does not absolve her from fault. She knew what she was doing. Parts of my childhood were F*&^ed up too...I think most people can say that.

Caitlin - posted on 08/11/2010




She's manipulative and has serious issues IMO. If I lived next door to her i'd give her a big smack in the face for all the people I know, family and friends who have fought cancer and won (or lost) their battles.

Jaime - posted on 08/11/2010




I was just checking out the facebook page she created to get her funding's since turned into quite the hate party. I'm not going to bother participating in the discussions because it's not going to affect this girl...she is already caught.

I can't imagine what would possess her to do something THIS drastic. It was completely pre-meditated, down to shaved head, plucked eyebrows, pale complexion, and on and on...

And the fact that she collected thousands of dollars and spent it already. I can't say I hate her...but I do think she needs some strong psychiatric help.

Sharon - posted on 08/11/2010




Psychiatrists get paid to show people like her the way to forgiveness.

I don't. I work hard for my $$ and I would never forgive someone who stole my money for their personal benefit.

People like her are why I don't donate to random needy strangers.

edited to add.....

and religion, lmao, she should find god and get absolved for being stupid.

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