The "Performing Seal"

Alyssa - posted on 03/21/2011 ( 8 moms have responded )

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I come across it all the time...mainly with family members trying to out-do one another with similar aged children.

"Johnny, show Aunty Fifi how you juggle watermelons while your standing on your head"

It irks the hell out of me, the child is put in the spotlight expecting to perform and inevitably runs away while the offending relation, usually the parent, is left embarrased and worried that the rest of the family think they are lying about the new found talent.

How do you deal with it? Is it good for the child or just plain showing off

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Johnny - posted on 03/21/2011

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Is that comparing for competitive purposes or comparing because they aren't sure if their child is developing normally. I have a friend who does that a lot, but I've realized that she is concerned that her son is quite behind. He seems just fine to me, but I guess he's not as "advanced" as other kids at his daycare. So she worries and compares. I'm not sure comparisons are always about competition.

Now, kids who are forced to put on little piano or dance recitals after dinner or bring down their report cards to show their straight A's. That's obnoxious.

Sharon - posted on 03/21/2011

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I don't come across these people because after they open their mouths I suddenly have an appointment to get to.

Sometimes its just entertaining and I'm ok with that but the one-up-manship shit pisses me off.

And forcing a kid to perform against their will, is just pathetic. I would only ask my kid to show off a talent they were happy and proud to show off and we're in the proper setting for it. I don't ask my kids to play the piano at wedding receptions. I don't ask them to show off their soccer tricks while having dinner out. shit like that.

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Desiree - posted on 03/21/2011

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Its a case of competion. Because its always look how wonderful Emma Is, Emma say.... for Vovo. Dance Emma, count how old are you Emma Show Aunty..
Fools, My own children can't stand it, they think their aunt and uncle are pushing her in front of everyone else, The 2 idiots are causing a massive problem for themselves later. And my 2 are becoming very resentful,apart from the fact that those 2 always know better even though you have been there done that.

Desiree - posted on 03/21/2011

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Oh I thought I was the only person who has a family member like that. The difference these parents also have the nerve to say" Emma is only 2 did Cat do the same at this age" And all I want to do is say Hell Yes and age 12 she is doing everything a 12 year old should be doing including drive me up the wall, wait your time will come". Instead Hubby has said" When Darling Emma is Cat's Age Cat will have her degree and be planning her wedding and we will be on the way to being grandparents. You know its only 10 years from now!" Shit I wish my brother and his wife would shut up. Wait Emma is going to teach them a couple of lessons they are not expecting. Including the perfect temper tantrum. HEHE (rubs hands with glee)

Johnny - posted on 03/21/2011

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I think there is a bit of a difference between wanting your child to "show off" and wanting to show grandma a newly acquired skill. Especially if the child isn't really being pushed. I don't really have to do this, because my daughter is with my parents a couple days a week. But occasionally when she learns something new, I'll suggest she show them. If she doesn't, it's not a big deal at all. I guess I always figured that anyone with common sense knows that kids don't usually perform "on command" and their lack of doing so at a particular moment no way reflects their abilities. Of course, my kid is a bit of a show off so I don't generally have to ask. She's usually showing you her new "trick" the moment you walk into the room. Absolute opposite of me, I was super shy and still am.

April - posted on 03/21/2011

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I admit to doing this as well. My mom lives 4 hours away and sometimes I feel like she misses out on things. I like my son to show her the things he has learned so she can see for herself how much progress he is making in his 2 years of life!

Lady Heather - posted on 03/21/2011

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Being the former child who was ALWAYS asked to perform, it sucks. It's one thing if the child is eager to show off a newly acquired skill, but I kind of hated my parents for always requesting that I play or sing when people came over. I wasn't THAT good and I didn't always feel like performing. I think it's unfair of parents to put their kids on the spot like that.

Jenn - posted on 03/21/2011

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I admit to doing this sometimes. Like if my Mum comes over, I'll say "Shelby, can you count for Granny?" Of course they never do what you want them to because they aren't circus monkeys LOL! I don't think it's a big deal unless you are forcing a child to do something after they've declined.

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