To Leash or not to Leash..that is the question

~♥Little Miss - posted on 03/29/2011 ( 195 moms have responded )

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One of the other threads prompted this one for me....like one girl hiding in clothing, and then me talking about how I would take off running and get lost in a mall. What do you think about leashes, and when you see people with their kids harnessed?

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Krista - posted on 03/30/2011

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so? if some one has the right to leash their child... I have the right to find it funny... LOL!

True. And you also have the right to laugh at them.

And I have the right to believe that anybody who displays such behaviour is a cretin who is setting a terrible example for any children who are unfortunate enough to overhear her boorishness.

Ain't freedom grand?

Krista - posted on 03/30/2011

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Johnny said it perfectly. And I'll repeat what I said earlier: how the hell do you know for sure that the kid on the leash isn't autistic? How do you know for sure that his parents don't have a physical disability that precludes them from running after a darting toddler.

You don't. But you laughed anyway. And you're oddly proud of that.

For all you know, you were laughing at an autistic kid.

For all you know, you were laughing at a kid who had almost been run over by a car the previous week.

For all you know, you were laughing at a kid who had survived an abduction attempt.

For all you know, you were laughing at a kid whose mother is disabled.

So, when you're in the company of your own kids, and you laugh at other people, you're teaching your kids to be the kind of adults who mock other people, and then say, "Whatsa matter? Can't you take a joke?"

And adults like that tend to not be very well-liked.

Vegemite - posted on 03/30/2011

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All i can say is birds of a feather.......I personally like to have friends that care enough to challenge me and even sometimes offend me to make me think about things that aren't right with my behaviour or attitude. I think that's one of the reasons I like this group so much. Openly laughing at anyone for any reason is just plain rude.

Kate CP - posted on 03/30/2011

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Krissy, I could give two shits if you like or don't like kiddie leashes. I couldn't care less if you find them funny. What I find abhorrent is the fact that you OPENLY LAUGHED AT another person. That's not about your friggin' opinion, that's about tact and common decency (or lack thereof).

Tara - posted on 03/31/2011

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@Deanna,
You are a Christian no? I am pretty sure you have stated that you are.
If that is the case, how do you think JC would feel about your choice to laugh at others based on the fact you feel they should be laughed at?
How is this teaching your children the messages of peace and tolerance?
Would it be okay if your children laughed at a child who was using a wheelchair even if they looked "normal"?
What about a child who has a colostomy bag? Laughable?
What about a normal looking 3 year old on a leash? Laughable? Right, you already covered that. But what if that child had epilepsy? Or Tourettes? Or Autism? all conditions you would never be able to "see"? It's okay to laugh at them and teach your kids to laugh at them?

I am appalled at the fact that anyone thinks it's okay to openly laugh at another person in this way. I think it is teaching children to be intolerant and disrespectful toward others with differences.
I have six kids, I never used a leash with them, but I would never sit there and laugh and encourage my kids to laugh at people who happen to use one. Just as I would never laugh at someone who is using a set of braces to walk, or some child who wears head gear to protect themselves from themselves etc. etc.
Laughing and making fun of others is childish and immature and is only teaching children to be intolerant and insensitive.
It's a leash this time, but could it be someone's weight? Their height? Their disability? Their skin colour?
Hmmm.... just seems like too many adults haven't learned the lesson of "treat others as you would like to be treated"

This conversation has been closed to further comments

195 Comments

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Misty - posted on 10/23/2011

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i use a leash on my very impulsive and very social 3yr old for her safety and my sanity. no matter how safe you are, someone else isnt. i have seen to many near accidents with other children, seen children walked right out of department stores out of thier parents grasp. i use a leash, i have never had any problems from other mothers. it gives my daughter the knowledge that she can look but also the security of knowing i could never walk away from her in a crowded situation. my oldest dtr i have never used any kind of leash or stroller, she is very self disciplined and never wanders. i would much rather err on the side of being overly cautious than the mother on the 5 o'clock news learning her child has been abducted and abused because i turned my head for one second. i would never say someone was a lazy parent for being cautious and to do so is very inconsiderate of other peoples need for safety and security.

~♥Little Miss - posted on 04/05/2011

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I don't think my son would wear one now, but it might be worth a shot.

Krista - posted on 04/05/2011

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And yet, there were probably people there who looked at you and judged you for having a 5-year-old in a kid harness. :P If anybody ever says anything to you about having your kids wear one, I DO hope you give them a hearty serving of Shut The Fuck Up.

Holly - posted on 04/05/2011

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Marina, she was five at the time.. our kids aren't (always) the issue. We have to protect them from the idiots of the world. My daughter was walking beside me, holding my hand, behaving awesomely... sometimes we have to do drastic things to protect our children not just from themselves but from others. :(

Krista, I sat down and CRIED along with her as she screamed her little heart out. It scared her so bad. I am now on high alert to the point I don't like crowds with my kids.. but the events are awesome for them and they enjoy them so we do it.. just very very very carefully! :( I am CONSTANTLY doing head counts... :(

~♥Little Miss - posted on 04/05/2011

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Thank goodness you had her tail on! That frazzles me and I don't even know you! We have a big trip coming up involving a lay over in a HUGE airport. You have just convinced me. If my 1 year old is walking on her own by then, she will most definately have a harness. My 5 year old listens well.

Krista - posted on 04/05/2011

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Jeez, Holly...you must have been so shaken, thinking of what almost happened!!! Things like that happen so fast -- good for you for your quick reaction time.

Holly - posted on 04/05/2011

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A "leash" saved my oldest daughters life when she was around five. We were in a huge crowd and I was terrified I would lose her. I had her hand tightly in mine and I had the leash connecting our wrists thinking the biggest worry was being "jostled" and losing her. The crowd was literally shoulder to shoulder packed. Suddenly a guy walked up behind us, grabbed her under her arms and kept walking!! I grabbed the leash securely, screamed "That's MY KID" and jerked the leash as HARD AS I COULD! Between the jerk and the scream I startled the guy and pulled her out of his hands/made him drop her. Her knees were very busted up and her wrist was bruised but she was WITH ME!!! As opposed to GONE!! Her daddy took off after the guy (was probably going to kill him to be honest) and never caught the guy!!! Can you imagine, never caught the guy and she wasn't wearing her leash?? Now we have the cute little backpack harnesses. Both of my boys love them (age 3 and 16 months). We don't call them leashes we call them "tails". :) Since the leash connects to the part right by their butt it works. They even ask to put them on. They are not a substitute for adult supervision. They are not for dragging the kids along the ground. They help us ensure that the boys do come home safe. I don't prefer to use strollers and in a mob of people a stroller is simply rude to use. There isn't room for them and you are constantly running people over with them and asking people to give you more room. We do babywear but a full day of babywearing is hard on mom and baby! The kids want to get down and walk too. Using a "tail" means that I can make sure they stay with us and safe. We do several LARGE events a year where there are several thousand people in attendance. I also like to use the "tail" when we are going to be walking and crossing several busy streets. We have a friend that lives less than a mile away but it does mean crossing two major streets to get there. When we walk there for playdates any child walking wears a tail. My three year old will hold his own tail and run in the grass while I walk. He knows to stop and wait for mom to catch up :) Then he hands me his tail and holds my hand to cross streets. Since I have to have my attention on multiple children it ensures that if one child decides to bolt ("OH, ball in the street"
OH doggy" "Oh, KITTY", etc) that I can make sure they are safe and do not get hit by a car. I also don't have to abandon or pick up another child to save another child's life. They are well behaved kiddos but they are still just that.. KIDS! :) I can ensure that if they decide to pull out of my hand and bolt the tail will keep them safe.. and with me! Now the youtube video of the walmart mom dragging her kid who is laying in the floor... NOT COOL>. but when used properly.. they are a life saving tool :)

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Mmmm Ethan (well hubby really) took me out for Mexican yesterday for mothers day - I had to avoid the spice I love though because of this damn heartburn :-( - but the chicken burritos was so yummy mmmmm.

Stephanie, I don't like the wrist teathers because they can put too much stress on the child's wrist, that's why I prefer the leashes as they spread out the pressure.

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Marina- It's not so hard to make tortillas...as long as no one expects them to be round lol. ; )

Stephanie - posted on 04/03/2011

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I don't think I like the harness as it does look much like a leash and something about that just makes me uncomfortable... That being said I agree that children can very easily and quickly run off and so I understand the need to keep the child close that's why I prefer those wrist tethers.

~♥Little Miss - posted on 04/03/2011

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For dinner this week, I will make refried beans with the left over fresh pinto beans, and scrambleds eggs with the rest of the chile with veggie meat, and of course heat up the tortillas. I love cooking my husbands traditional foods!

~♥Little Miss - posted on 04/03/2011

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I did make chile con carne tonight veggie meat though, with mexican rice, fresh pinto beans, and heated some tortillas...my husband has a pot belly now.

~♥Little Miss - posted on 04/03/2011

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Kati, I am impressed with the homeade Tortillas, my MIL tried to teach me once...it was a disaster! Takes talent!

Julianne, you would be able to eat alot of the things I make! Pinto beans from scratch, the green chile, Mexican rice, chile con queso ( I can make it without the cheese, different than American version..has green peppers, jalepeno peppers,onion, tomatoes, celery...yummy...and muenster cheese,...but you can omit that) Lots of stuff!

Tara - posted on 04/03/2011

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Just wanted to congratulate everyone on a nice, peaceful, helpful and encouraging thread!
So nice to see a thread with 100+ posts and no negativity.
Nice work ladies.
Oh, and thanks for the Mexican craving I'm now having. lol.

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I always make my man homemade tortillas i have to !! lol and of course his rice. he could he could arroz, frijoles, and tortillas everyday!!!

Rosie - posted on 04/03/2011

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i just made homemade tortillas, and then made chips out of them! just thought i'd share since we're talking about mexican food. oh, and i'm having tacos tonight, LMAO!

Sharon - posted on 04/03/2011

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Leash 'em.

Hell. Use shock collars.

Half the issues I see today are because parents refuse to PARENT their kids.

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In the beginning i thought they were ridiculous and terrible!! Until i read a thread that was about this and what one woman said and then it did change my way of thinking. When i see one i still think its a little weird but im not quick to make a judgement anymore. Would i use them . . . No. but u never know,..... but im pretty sure i wouldnt.

Tina - posted on 04/03/2011

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It only takes a split second for something to go wrong. For a child to take off or be coxed away by somebody. They may look silly but i'd sooner look silly than have a child run out in front of a car or get into the hands of the wrong person.

~♥Little Miss - posted on 04/03/2011

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Oh yeah Joy, I have seen many leash debates go a little....NUTZ! I like how this one turned out!

Glad to hear that Johnny! We were an inspiration! LOL

Stephanie...wholy shit that is truly terrible. I would have cried and told everyone to fuck off.

Johnny - posted on 04/02/2011

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Thanks for the inspiration ladies. After reading this we went to check out the new Mexican place in our neighborhood tonight. Amazing, authentic, delicious. Not Old El Paso fake stuff like we usually get around here. And live music (guitar & singing). Our daughter was up dancing with a bunch of other toddlers while I sipped an awesome margarita and hubby had a Pacifico. I wouldn't have thought about going until I read this :))))



Oh, and no leashed children were present - just so I'm on topic ;-p

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Love, LOve, LOVE how this debate has gone! Seriously! If you girls have been around awhile, you know that this debate usually sparks everything BUT Mexican food recipes lol I SO love that it's gone there ♥

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That is one awesome thing about being ina Mexican family....they know how to throw a party. And, they throw a party for anything and everything...if the wind blows there's a party to celebrate it! That part of it is a blast! : ) One year I was 'volunteered' to cook Christmas Day dinner....at about 10pm on Christmas Eve!!!! I found one open store, no turkeys, bare shelves...I was in a panic....and really irritated bc wtf, ya know? Give me some damn notice! I don't come from a big family so I'm not used to cooking for 50+ people on a whim! AND, to top it off I had just had a baby! He was barely a month old plus I had my 1 year old and I was spent. Why me? Why now? Buuuuuttttt, I did it and survived. And somehow accomodated 30 overnight guests. About 50+ for dinner and 25-30 spent the night. We did actually have a really good time but getting to that point was a challenge. ; )

~♥Little Miss - posted on 04/02/2011

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Definately do PM me Stephanie! My only problem with his family is that they call me Anglo. I am a light skinned Italian, but I am third generation straight from Italy on both sides of my family. It drives me a little nuts! But my MIL and all of her family treated me like I was family from the first day we met. I was lucky with that. But yeah, their still are issues there...I know exactly what you mean.

We have a family reunion in El Paso in June. It should be a huge party atleast 300 ppeople, and that is just ONE of the families!

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Marina- My husband was born and raised in Mexico and came here for college. Most of his family still lives there. His dad, one brother and two sisters live here plus a bunch of nieces and nephews. Did your in-laws have a problem with you not being Mexican or stereotype you in any way? We should talk lol. It isn't easy being in an interracial marriage bc there are so many assholes out there who think they have the right to stick their nose in your life and pass judgement on something they know nothing about. I'll pm you! ; )

~♥Little Miss - posted on 04/02/2011

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LOL....infact, I am gonna roast green chiles, jalepeno peppers, tomato, make a green chile salsa tomorrow and make a yummy mexican dish with the rest of it. Chile con Carne (but with veggie meat). I thank my inlaws for teaching me some great dishes that my family can have their traditional food so far away from home. But I never forget to include my Italian heritage too!

~♥Little Miss - posted on 04/02/2011

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Stephanie, i am Itialian, and I married into an authentic Mexican family. My MIL is from El Paso, and her decendants are from Mexico, and my FIL is sraight from Mexico. He was a a cook in Mexico, and my MIL is an excellent cook. I have learned some wonderful Mexican recipes. Roasted green Chiles are my favorite smell!

Jamie - posted on 04/01/2011

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I used to think they were silly until I had kids. I bought one just recently as a safety measure. My 15month son got away from me in the front yard and went straight for the street. There was a car coming and lucky for me I caught him just in time. Scared the heck out of me. This away he can walk with me and have freedom to move. But I can still keep a hand on him just in case. I hope this helps. :)

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Oh Stephanie, yes please!! I think I can source most spices/ingredients. If not, I can find a sub.

Yeah, the quesadilla is yummy,but not a quesadilla. lol

The idea of Mexican here is El Paso brand stuff. But then, look how far it is from Mexico!

Christine, our family's favourite dessert is the mud cake. To. Die. For. I also like the calamari steak.

Stifler's - posted on 04/01/2011

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I think a leash at Sizzler is a must if your kid is too old for strollering it everywhere. I love the cheese toast too and my sister always goes to the attendant "I'm not leaving until I get my fuck off mints". Then we end up getting 3 plates of them because we don't leave after the first.

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Christine those hog tail fries are the best! I wish i didn't live so far from a hogsbreath. I might have to take a roadtrip soon. To those who asked i think it was already answered but Hogsbreath is a like a steakhouse with steak that literally melts in your mouth mmmmmmm I'm so hungry.

Jenn - posted on 04/01/2011

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OK - I have no clue what you guys are talking about and I'm too lazy to read all 8 pages right now, but I have no issue with someone using a "leash" for their kid. I had one but never used it. I have a 5 year old son and 2 year old twin girls, and I guess we've just never been anywhere that I needed one. Strollers work well for some things, and sometimes we'd just walk and hold hands with Phillip walking directly in front of me or sometimes Phillip and Elizabeth would hold hands and walk in front of me and Shelby. Or then at the grocery store, they have the 2-seater carts for the girls and Phillip will walk or climb into the bottom of the cart.

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Donna- If you want some good Mex recipes I have tons! My name is 'Hernandez' ya know. ; ) Can you buy good Mex spices there?



Oh, I saw on the website their version of Tex-Mex quesadillas and it looked so good...but nothing like a quesadilla, though, haha! : p

Vegemite - posted on 04/01/2011

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mmmmm you woman are terrible mmmm hog's breath prime rib steaks. Oh the calamari one is the best or how about the byron bay chilli oh oh the avocado one, hang on they are all the best. The hog tail fries. The Hoggies rocky road sundae and their cocktails. Sorry girls I had to get it out or i'd be there tonight stuffing my face.

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Stephanie, it's not really Tex Mex (I wish!), but more like a steakhouse. There's a serious lack of good Mexican restaurants here. The only good one I know of in Brisbane is owned and run by a guy from Santa Cruz! I miss all the good places in LA and have too cook Mexican myself if I want something decent. Heaps of great asian restaurants here though!

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It's so funny to me that an Australian restaurant has Tex-Mex food! I guess it just never occured to me lol.



My kids are 3 and 4 now and up until now I've used their leash harnessess in the airport bc who wants their baby to bolt through security into a sea of strangers. Now that they're not so little I don't plan to use the leashes next time we travel bc I know they won't take off when I'm trying to load everything on the security conveyer including a very heavy double stroller with no help. It isn't easy and I don't have eyes in the back of my head and have only 2 hands so I do what I have to do to keep my kids safe. I will however continue to use the stroller in the airport bc it's just me with the 2 kids and running at the speed of light from gate to gate and making it on time to your next flight is virtually impossible without a bit of help. So yeah, they are a bit too old for a stroller but in the airport all of the normal 'rules' are out the window.

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OMG I love Hogsbreath!! I can't wait til the one in Ipswich reopens. It was underwater in the floods.

Wow, is QLD really the only state with Sizzler? I wonder why that is? I love the Sunday breakfast.

You know you can make the cheese toast yourself. The recipe can be found online. I'd put the link, but I can't from an iPad.

Johnny - posted on 04/01/2011

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A leash might be useful by a salad bar, come to think of it. When I was about 7 we were at the White Spot for dinner (it's a chain here) and a boy from my class was also there with his parents. He climbed up onto the tray rails and fell in. Still remember that like it was yesterday...

Johnny - posted on 04/01/2011

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We haven't had a Sizzler here for at least 20 years. I loved the salad bar. I love salad bars in general and I'm really hoping that health regulations don't prevent them from ever making some sort of "retro hip" comeback.

Kate CP - posted on 04/01/2011

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Whatsa Hogsbreath? And why do you like it so much? Sounds awful... :P

Stifler's - posted on 04/01/2011

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I love Hogsbreath too. We've been to Mackay, Townsville and Rockhampton.... just to go to Hogsbreath because there isn't one in Emerald.

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All this talk of sizzler is making me want Hogsbreath! Only breakfast time and i want dinner :s Lol.

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They got rid of our Sizzler a long time ago. It was taken over by a local place that did a lot of the same food (minus the toast though, I loved that toast). But now it's not even that. It's a pizza place there. :(

Stifler's - posted on 04/01/2011

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Bahaha yes we still have Sizzler in QLD, I love Sizzler!! They're everywhere but I've heard none of the other states have Sizzler anymore.

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