Upper lip hair removal for biracial girl

♏*PHOENIX*♏ - posted on 12/25/2010 ( 35 moms have responded )

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I found this on another thread...what would you tell this lady?


"Does anyone have any ideas or thoughts about upper lip hair removal for a young biracial girl? Or bleaching? My daughter is only three but has already been teased about this and seems upset by it. Not sure I want to start this already............................."

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Stifler's - posted on 12/26/2010

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I think 3 is a bit young for waxing and stuff. But I really do wish my mum had let me get my eyebrows waxed when I was a kid instead of just telling me I was beautiful and it didn't matter. It mattered to ME.

♏*PHOENIX*♏ - posted on 12/26/2010

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I think what would I do if it were my daughter…who is only 3 but will get older, and kids will be crueler and not understanding. You can only control your life and that of your child…not anyone else’s

And so I would look into what I could do to help her….

Sherri - posted on 12/28/2010

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My opinion leave till the little girl is a tween and let her decide which route she would like to take. No option other than leaving it there is ideal.

Iris - posted on 12/27/2010

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I just looked at the picture of her child. I don't see anything that could justify her waxing or bleaching her daughter.

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C. - posted on 12/28/2010

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But not all waxes are chemical free and they can remove layers of skin, which can cause an infection. Nair for your face isn't as harsh as Nair for your body. It's supposed to be a much gentler formula (I don't have dark hair on my face, so I wouldn't know). But it's supposed to be a mild version.

And with waxing just pulling the hairs out, bacteria can get in.. Again, it can cause an infection.

Dana - posted on 12/28/2010

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Yes, Nair on your face is harsher than waxing, you're using chemicals that reach into the hair follicle and burn the hair. Waxing just pulls it out.

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I have sensitive skin and eczema and waxing is a lot easier on me than nair, with that stuff I get chemical burn and break out because of my skin type. same with bleaches whereas wax its just one strip pfft and then done. I'm not saying its ideal for a little girl to have to do that but better wax then risk side effects of chemicals. I gave birth naturally as well ;) and I'm not downplaying the pain of waxng but if its that important to her she'll want to do it again if not then maybe it will give her a new perspective on it who knows.

C. - posted on 12/27/2010

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Nair on your face seems harsh, but waxing doesn't??

And yes, they have some Nair specifically for your face. I've seen it before.

Kate CP - posted on 12/27/2010

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Sounds like they ripped off a layer or two of skin. That'll burn like a mo-fo.

Sherri - posted on 12/27/2010

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I am not a wimp by any means I actually have an enormously high pain tolerance but for what ever reason that was horrible. I seriously would rather give birth again and I had no meds for that and I swear it was less painful.

Dana - posted on 12/27/2010

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Haha, really if you think that's bad then you should try a bikini wax, facial hair is a walk in the park compared to that. ;)

Sherri - posted on 12/27/2010

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I think they have one that you can use on your face. I am not 100% positive though. I washed my face after I had my lip waxed. To try and soothe the pain. They didn't burn me or anything and actually did my eyebrows at the same time but my lip was so raw and sensitive. I washed my face as soon as I got home but it hurt for a few days afterwards and then I broke out I think because it was so raw. It was a form of medevil torture I swear. I can not understand why other woman put themselves through it.

Rosie - posted on 12/27/2010

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nair makes me break out in massively itchy, burning bumps whenever i use it. i can't imagine using that on a 3 year old!! maybe using one of those facial hair trimmers??

Dana - posted on 12/27/2010

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The key to facial waxing, if it's gives you a rash/break out, is to wash whatever it is they wipe you down with to get the remaining wax off. It's usually an oil based substance which isn't good for many people.

I actually wax myself.

Sherri - posted on 12/27/2010

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Has anyone actually had this done? I had it done ONCE and let me tell you it was the first and last time!! I would rather give birth again then have that done. It hurt so bad and then it broke out afterwards for a good week. I do not have problem skin, not sensitive, never had acne etc. It was horrific. I have to say to put a 3 yr old through that for cosmetic reasons NO WAY!! If it bothers the parents so much use some nair on it and be done with it.

Dana - posted on 12/27/2010

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I actually had a hard time telling from the photo. As someone who is one hairy, (part) Russian, chick, I can tell you, you might not see it in photo's but, up close you would be able to tell.

♏*PHOENIX*♏ - posted on 12/27/2010

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I soooo forgot Iris is part of the same community as me…so she was able to look at the lady’s picture :-0)

Kate CP - posted on 12/27/2010

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Iris: This isn't about Ebony's little girl so I don't know who you looked at?

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You're the parent you need to decide what you want to teach your daughter. To love her flaws and how to deal with ridicule? That if she doesn't like something about herself she has the power to change it? Both are valuable lessons but to be sure you're sending the right message have a little chat with her first, even at 3 you can tell a childs true motives just in the wording. Why does she want the hair removed? if its because people tease her I would focus on that lesson first, how to cope with people since there will always be someone who doesnt like something about her bleaching her hair wont remove ignorant people from the world. if its because she doesnt like the way it looks then I would say go for it because then you're teaching her that she is in control of her body and if that is the only thing standing in her way of looking in the mirror and thinking I am beautiful then why not? good self-esteem/image is priceless and one of the most important things a mother can pass down to her daughter! I wanted my hair cut when I was little because everyone else's hair was short, my mom said no. I wanted my eyebrows plucked because I didn't like how bushy they were and my mom did that for me. I'm 22 and don't have any plastic surgery but I do wear make-up pluck my eyebrows and shave my legs. No one should alter themselves to make other people happy but to make themselves happy I don't see anything wrong with that so long as the changes aren't drastic. try waxing its not permanent but bleach is a bad idea I think because of allergic reactions. Best of luck to you both I hope it works out!

Bonnie - posted on 12/26/2010

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If it's that bad, I don't see a problem with removing the hair. I just can't picture a 3 year old having hair anywhere.

Sharon - posted on 12/26/2010

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ferfuckssake. my left eye actually twitched when I read that.

IF it looks like a full on boars hair brush - I would consider waxing it.

using the prescription topical anesthetic the hospitals use before starting IVs and giving shots.

But no bleaching. And I'm serious - it has to look like a horses mane, not just a shadow or something.

And I would do it.

You guys remember the ugly baby post? My husband had a friend whose baby looked like a little chimpanzee? covered in hair? yeah - oh hell yeah I would have. Bad enough the baby was lumpier than notre dame hunchback and elephant man put together but hairy and female too? fuck yeah I'd have dipped my kid in a vat of wax or bought her a chewbacca mask... something.

Dana - posted on 12/26/2010

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That's how I feel, Ebony, I wouldn't want to leave it up to "hoping" kids would know better, because they don't.

Dana - posted on 12/26/2010

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Hm, I guess it depends on the extent of it. If it's seriously noticeable to the point of embarrassment, then I'd look into the best options.

C. - posted on 12/26/2010

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Hmm.. Maybe, Kati. But I guess I don't think like that b/c my husband is part Italian as well as my aunt and cousins. They all have very dark, wiry hair with white skin, so I guess to me that's why I didn't get it, maybe..

But I agree that the mom should teach some older kids and adults some manners. 3 is entirely too young to be doing anything like that. Waxing can cause allergic reactions or infections and bleaching can also cause allergic reactions.

Rosie - posted on 12/26/2010

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i think they mentioned the biracial thing to maybe point out that the hair is really dark compared to a just a caucasian?? 3 is way to young for bleaching or waxing. who the hell says anything to a 3 year old girl about facial hair anyway?? i think the mother is just insecure.

Kate CP - posted on 12/26/2010

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Who teases a 3 year old for having hair on her upper lip? I'm pretty sure other 3 year olds don't even frickin' notice. She obviously needs to teach some older kids and adults some manners and not worry about her daughter's looks.

JuLeah - posted on 12/26/2010

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Teach her to love herself and not to define herself by what others think. If it were not the hair on her lip, it'd be her hair, or her glasses, or that she is too short, or too tall, or develops young or develops later, or has big feet, or dark hair, or light hair ...... and at three???? kids at three don't really notice or comment, this comes from an adult who is more focused on how she looks then who she is; the very fact that they mentioned she is biracial sent up a red flag for me .... maybe cause I knew kids back home who were biracial and had parents always trying to hid or deny that - went to some extreem measures too.

C. - posted on 12/26/2010

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Um, first of all, what does it matter whether they're biracial or not? Hair removal is hair removal. Second, Only THREE???? Um, no. Three year olds do not need hair removal or bleaching.. THEY'RE THREE!!!!!

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