When you die...

Cassie - posted on 09/26/2010 ( 85 moms have responded )

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When you die, do you plan to be buried or cremated? What are your reasons for your choice?

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Jocelyn - posted on 09/27/2010

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I want to be Bio-cremated. Here's a quick overview.



A new alternative to cremation is alkaline hydrolysis, also known as bio-cremation or water resolution. The body is placed in a special chamber where it is subjected to water, heat, pressure and potassium hydroxide. After a few hours all that remains are the bones and a liquid composed of amino acids, sugars and salts. The bones are then processed into a fine, white powder that can be buried or scattered. The liquid is non-toxic and may be disposed of in the earth or water.



It sounds a little weird, but then again I'm weird (and environmentally conscious!) to begin with. Win win.

Cassie - posted on 09/26/2010

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I have begun looking into "green" burials. I really don't agree with the entire burial process including preservation measures for the body, the huge concrete vaults and expensive caskets. It is all just a money-making business created, IMO, to exploit the grief of a family who has lost a loved one.



Here is a website on green burials as well as links to green burial cemeteries in different states

http://www.greenburials.org/index.htm



*Edited to add the link... oops :)

[deleted account]

Krista, I 'll be thrown in along the Eastern Shore so you should be safe to swim in the Northumberland Strait.

Kate CP - posted on 09/26/2010

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Wow...morbid. But, I want to be cremated and then buried I think. The idea of being embalmed and then rotting creeps me out.

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Jodi - posted on 10/18/2010

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I have a will and testament and in it I state my death wishes. I want to be cremated, instead of a traditional funeral I would like my family (children and husband mostly, but sisters ideas should be taken into consideration, but children and husband have last say) to decide on a spot that makes them think of me or that they have fond memories of me or whatever, a sentimental spot to THEM. I would like a non-denominational priest to say a few words and give my soul a blessing as my ashes are spread in the spot selected. I also stated that I want only close family members, I hate huge spectacles of funerals, I don't want people there who havn't spoken to me or seen me in years, it's a private moment for the family, not a time for them to be on display.

Becky - posted on 10/18/2010

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I would prefer to be cremated and my ashes spread in a private location. Like an above poster, the thought of having my blood drained out of me and embalmed then left to decompose underground is not my idea of how I want it when I pass on.

Kimberly - posted on 09/30/2010

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Ick. I do not want ANYONE seeing me dead. I do not want that to be their last memory of me. Ashes to ashes. And remember me laughing.

Tah - posted on 09/30/2010

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buried..my mom would come to heaven and thrash me if i was cremated. My cousin committed suicide and her mother had her cremated and my mom keeps saying..i can't believe they burned that girl up. I think it would give my family more closure to actually see me and say goodbye. I don't think i will care much what is happening to a body i am not using anymore..it's just a shell...

[deleted account]

Hi KImberly. In Japan, where land is severely limited, most people are cremated. The remains are then given to the family. Instead of caskets, etc., the urns are placed in very artfully decorated and lacquered display boxes. When I visited a friend outside of Tokyo several years ago, her mother had close to a dozen different family members urns on display - they remember their deceased family members each and every day that way. I thought it was a great way to show love even long after someone is gone. Hugs.

Kimberly - posted on 09/29/2010

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Cremated. I'd like a pretty urn. I don't want to be worm food or take up a lot of space. It's Green.

[deleted account]

cremation. Less hassle, less tramatic, less expensive, and I want to be buried in my flower garden.

LaCi - posted on 09/29/2010

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"I plan to be cremated and my ashes mixed with my husbands. "

I told my boyfriend that's what I wanted but he looked at me like I was ridiculous lol.

Johnny - posted on 09/28/2010

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Meghan, your post reminds me of this tv home makeover show I saw once where the expert comes in to fix the home decor problems that are keeping the couple from being happy. This one couple had both been widowed. He still had his wife's ashes in a decorative urn on the mantle, and she still had her dead husband's lazyboy in front of the TV. They were both resentful of the other's "objet" and yet each refused to throw them out. They were totally headed for divorce court.

[deleted account]

LOL Krista!! I love that movie!!! I don't know that I'd like to turn 65 and be taken off to "the home" though.

Meghan - posted on 09/28/2010

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I plan to be cremated and my ashes mixed with my husbands. Our children will be the ones to spread our ashes probably out by our favorite reservoir. If I die WAY before my husband I told him that he could keep my ashes around until he decides to remarry. If and when he decides to remarry I expect him to "get rid of me" so to speak. I refuse to be the thing that would come between him and his new wife. In return though, I told him that I am only getting married once in my life. He is my husband. For better or for worse, If god forbid, he were to die and I found someone else. I wouldn't marry him. I am a wife to one person, and one person only. He's not OK with that. But that is my choice.It doesn't make sense, but I don't care.

[deleted account]

ROFL Krista! I just watched that movie a few weeks ago on Turner Classics! Soylent Green is peeeeopleee!!

Heather - posted on 09/28/2010

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wow JuLeah, I totally didn't realize that! Learn something new every day. :) I suppose Muslims don't either. I've always thought embalming was really gross. I know a girl who always wanted to be an undertaker and own a funeral home...looking back on it, she would have been GREAT around dead people. hehe.

JuLeah - posted on 09/28/2010

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I am Jewish. We are buried with no embalming fluid or anything like that ....

Charlie - posted on 09/28/2010

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Obviously i know i wont care when im dead because i wont know but the romantic in me thinks the idea of being stuffed in a coffin or jar in a small confined space is like being eternally trapped , FOREVER ARRRGH thats why the freedom of being thrown out into the sea to let my spirit free to wonder so alluring .

Silly i know , but still .

[deleted account]

I'd like to be buried. I like the thought of my relatives visiting my grave and bringing me flowers...even though I'll be dead, probably because I do that for my relatives who are buried =] I'm also on the organ donor register so they can have all the organs they want!

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I think cremation makes more sense, I'll be dead so I really don't care what gets done with my body.
But I was not able to cremate my son, my family wanted me to for financial reasons, I just couldn't do it.

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Donna, my grandad has always said that we should wear colourful clothes to his funeral, except red, I don't think he likes red. He has said if we wear red he will haunt us lol

[deleted account]

Cremated, then if my family wants to then they can have the jar of my ashes put into one of those walls that have a plaque and the jar behind it. I don't see a point in being buried, wasted land as far as I'm concerned.

[deleted account]

I'm with LaCi! I've told my husband when I die he's to put me in the car and just boot me out the door as he drives up some mountain. Let the animals eat me. Circle of life, you know? The only catch is that I'd like to donate whatever can be used and that would mean telling someone in authority that I'm dead.

There is one thing I have actually written in my will. There is to be NO black or somberness at any memorial service for me. Definitely NO viewing... GROSS! No one is to cry. I want people to laugh and remember the good times... or the stupid things I'd done. Jim Henson's funeral really touched me, because it was like that. Everyone was wearing bright colours and reminiscing with laughter.

LaCi - posted on 09/28/2010

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Donate whatever is good and burn the rest. There's no reason for my corpse to take up space. Hell, throw me in the woods so something can eat me. Medical research is fine. I don't care. I definitely don't need afterlife real estate though.

Jennifer - posted on 09/27/2010

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i'd either like to be donated or buried in a pine box and allowed to decompost. no need to preserve a body that could be better used elsewhere.



my parents have told my brother and i that they want to be buried in a single "double wide" casket. they are hoping they die at the same time, but if they don't then we are supposed to have the first one dug up, so we can add the body of the other. and my mom said if its possible, she wants their dead bodies to be spooning HAHA. my parents are crazy.



by husbands grandmother wants to be cremated and she wants us to scatter her ashes inside a casino...she said that to avoid getting in trouble she wouldn't mind if we nonchalantly place her ashes in various ashtrays around the casino hahahahaha

Sharon - posted on 09/27/2010

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> LOL despite my attitude here, I don't expect to be the center of attention at the feast. and a picture on the table, nah - the huge 3 foot by 5 foot oil painting of me hanging over the mantle will suffice....

OH, and I figure at least on the side board nestled between the sliced turkey and sweet potato casserole!

[deleted account]

LOL Sharon! I've got this image of a Thanksgiving dinner, your kids and grandkids all around a long table with tons of yummy food and beautiful place settings for everyone, including your urn. They can strap you into a booster seat and slide you right up to the table. And I have a vision of your profile pic, beautifully framed into the side of your marble urn, staring at them while they pass the gravy.....lol

Sharon - posted on 09/27/2010

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I'm not sure.

The idea of rotting in the ground creeps me out (dawn of the dead type shit, blech).

Fire - scared to death of burning alive. yeah yeah - I'm dead.

I think I'm going to leave it up to my kids, they are the ones i'll leave behind. They are the ones who will need solace and the ability to live with themselves.

Are they ok thinking of me in the abstract without a site to visit?

Are they ok with toting/sharing my cremated remains? (I totally expect my urn to be at every family function, christmas, births, deaths etc) (I'm liking this idea....)

or sprinkling, dumping my ashes somewhere significant?

Whatever they want. But I'm really liking option 2.. just sounds cool as hell.

[deleted account]

I am still uncertain... Reading your posts makes me even more confused as I see both sides of the argument.... I was thinking cremated and scattered over the mountains or something.

[deleted account]

Joy I am so glad I'm not the only creepy one who would rather burn alive then be burried hehe.

Krista - posted on 09/27/2010

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Ah, come on, Wanda! I swim in the Northumberland Strait! I don't need your manky old ashes getting all over me. ; )

[deleted account]

Cremated and thrown in the ocean. My father always says that when he dies we're to put him in a garbage bag and thhrow him out with the trash.

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Yeah I'd rather be burned alive than buried alive too lol Burning alive would totally suck but it would be fastter than dying slowly underground.

Sara - posted on 09/27/2010

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Cremated. Not that it will matter to me, but the thought of being in a box in the ground and decaying slowly over time does not sit well with me. I'd rather be cremated and have my ashes scattered. I also don't want a showing or a viewing and I don't want to be embalmed.

Isobel - posted on 09/27/2010

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I just want to be buried in a pine box because it seems like the most natural choice. Cremation would be ok too I guess...if it were outside on a wood pyre or something.

Isobel - posted on 09/27/2010

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you'd rather be burned alive than buried alive? iiiiiinteresting ;) and creepy

[deleted account]

I want to be cremated and then scattered, I haven't decided where yet. I don't want to be buried, what if I'm not dead? I know it's unrealistic and people are not buried alive nowadays, but what if, that would be horrific! That is why cremation is my choice, if I was still alive I would die quicker than slowly suffocating and starving/ dehydrating in a coffin 6 foot under *shudders*.

My grandad has my nans ashes when he dies (hopefully he's got a while yet) my dad and his brothers and sister have to take their ashes and sprinkle them together in cornwall by the sea. I don't need a grave stone to remember my nan or show respects, when I want to be close to her I light a candle and sit quietly on my own.

Charlie - posted on 09/27/2010

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I feel a bit weird marking peoples death wishes as funny and nice LOL.

Jess - posted on 09/27/2010

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In the current economy I don't think I will ever be able to afford to buy my own home. So being buried might be my only chance to own a little plot of land ! Hehehe

Ez - posted on 09/27/2010

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To everyone who would choose burial because they want somewhere for their loved ones to visit, do you guys not have crematoriums? My grandfather and great-grandmother were both cremated and they have a plaque in the wall in front of where there ashes are kept. Loved ones can still go and place flowers and pay their respects.

Ez - posted on 09/27/2010

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Cremated and scattered.. there is no way I want to rot in the ground and the idea of someone keeping my ashes weirds me out too.

Charlie - posted on 09/27/2010

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I just wanted to say my grandfather also had his ashes scattered over the ocean and although he has a plaque to place flowers i find it much nicer to sit down the beach and overlook the ocean where he rests for that reason i dont really feel a need for a headstone or anything but thats just me :D

Jess - posted on 09/27/2010

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Buried, I don't like the idea of cremation and I'm totally selfish, I want a head stone that my friends and family will take care of and place flowers at. I would hat to be made into ash and scattered somewhere. In 50 years no one would know I had ever existed ! :(

Sarah - posted on 09/27/2010

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I'm sure I read somewhere that when you die you can be turned into a diamond somehow, that would be pretty cool!! Think it costs a bucket load of cash though!

I'm undecided to be honest. The reason I'd quite like to buried is so that I can have grave where people could visit. None of my relatives that have died have graves, and I've sometimes thought it would be nice to have some place to go to "see" them.
Guess I probably end up being cremated though.

Also, I want people to be REALLY miserable at my funeral........I'm dead dammit.......CRY!!!!!!! I'm going to haunt my own funeral and poke people with sticks that aren't showing enough grief! hehehehe!

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