Who deserves a rest?

Sarah - posted on 03/02/2010 ( 18 moms have responded )

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Do you think that Mum's or Dad's are most in need of a rest come the end of the day?

I've talked to my husband about this before, he thinks HE works the hardest being at work all day.
I say I work the hardest as i have to get the kids ready, look after my youngest all day, sort out all the meals, tidy up etc etc..............oh AND i work 16hrs a week too!
(i'm the clear winner obviously! haha)

So who works the hardest? Who deserves a rest? Or is it really about equal?

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18 Comments

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Charlie - posted on 03/03/2010

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In our houshold we equally deserve a rest i work all day chasing cooper around , cleaning , cooking ect ect but jamie works all day and when he is home he is a very hands on dad ho will happilly cook dinner if im too tired ( im pregnant as well ) we also take turns in having sleep ins too and if i need a nanna nap during the day he will take coop to the park or outside to play , i have it pretty good actually and i always offer the same to him when he needs a break .

Kylie - posted on 03/03/2010

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OMG this was my number one pet peeve.. Hubby comes home, has a shower, lays down and passes out until dinner time. I've walked out on him with kids in the past because of it. I think we both deserve a rest but the afternoon/early evening is the busiest, most hectic time of the day for my family.. the kids are tired, I'm trying to make dinner, bath them, finish off the house hold chores and get them into bed plus I look forward to talking to my hubby when he gets home and utilizing his help. What i hate even more is when he lays down and says I'm just resting my feet..no worries but 5 mins later hes snoring and the kids are screaming and I'm unstacking the dishwasher angrily like throwing the cutlery into the drawer but he happily sleeps through it all. We've talked about it and now he does not come home and go to sleep unless its Friday and i prepare dinner early and try to keep the kids quiet so he can chill. It infuriates me when he has a 4 hour nap in the arvo and then gets up at 6pm and stays awake untill 2 or 3am and then is tired the next day. he gets upset when i tell him to go to bed..and i don't enjoy being a nag. I never get a nap..unless i have a kid attached to my breast and we lay down together. I think if hes that tired he needs to pass out as soon as he gets home then he should goto bed earlier but noo he's never in bed before 11pm. *Sigh* My hubby works hard and so do I ..we both deserve a nap but theres a time and place!!! Sorry for the rant..i'm a little twisted because i never get a nap or sleep in and I'm the one awake throughout the night on call 24/7. Give me the 40 hour week and I'd like to see him put in the hours i do..he's be a mess and has admitted that too.

Maggie - posted on 03/03/2010

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for us, it's pretty even too. i'm self employed (run a large child care centre) so even though i'm "home" with our 10 month old i've been working non stop ... was even signing pay cheques in the hospital. (he was a month early so i was not prepared!). my husband is a banker so if i wanted to debate it, i'd definitely win!

Jenny - posted on 03/03/2010

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I belive things need to be split between the two of us but ussaly my husband wants to take care of the children after work.He loves being a father

Cathelijn - posted on 03/03/2010

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ME ME ME !!! seriously me!! I work full-time and I do most of the looking after and housework.... But things are changing now because as soon as papa is home he is the favourite now :-)

La - posted on 03/03/2010

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We both need a break. I would be happy just to be able to sleep in past when my daughter wakes up for one day!

Lindsay - posted on 03/03/2010

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As much as I hate to admit it, I think I have more free-time than Josh does. Three days a week, he's up at 4 am and heading to work and walks in just in time for me to head out the door for class. So those days, he works physcially all day then comes home to get the kids finished up with dinner, plays with them, bathes them, gets them ready for bed and to bed, and manages to have the house picked up when I get home. I couldn't do what I do without him. On the other days, he comes home more than willing to help with whatever needs to be done. Don't get me wrong, I do housework, school work, the running, the shopping, and everything in between from sun up to sun down but it's much more laid back. Which is good because I enjoy coming on here and chatting with you fine ladies! =)

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It depends on who has the hardest work to do and the age of the children. I don't think it's always one parent at every stage of family life. At some stages mom needs a rest and at others dad needs to rest. When My son was a young baby my husband had an easier job and he worked less hours and I needed rest. These days I have an easier life and my husband has a much harder job and works longer hours. He really needs the rest at the end of the day.

Dana - posted on 03/02/2010

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So true, Sharon. Even when I get a "break" because Ethan is all over his dad, I'm not sitting on my arse. I'm usually doing dishes, laundry or making food. My break away from Ethan and the house is usually going to the store. Although I do get my alone time here and there.

Sharon - posted on 03/02/2010

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i've done both.

Each deserves a rest from THEIR JOB. Sadly for SAHMs the job is 24/7. Everyone assumes we take a break here and there blah blah blah - yeah I've proven to my husband over and over that isn't true.

JL - posted on 03/02/2010

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Both, but I do get less rest and I rarely get a break. My husband even admits that I get the brunt of most of it when it comes to the kids, the house, the dogs, appointments, the cars, the bills, the banking, the cleaning, the errands and that I get far less time to myself to breathe and just be on my own. When my husband is not at work, weekends and holidays, he is off and the kids are less likely to go to him. The kids are always at me even when he tries to help. I don't get weekends whether I am working outside of the home or inside the home or both.

Jocelyn - posted on 03/02/2010

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I think it depends on the day. There are some days that I am just totally wiped and there are some days that Jordan has a bad day. It's give and take.

Jenny - posted on 03/02/2010

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I deserve more of a rest. He works his ass off physically, yes, but I work then come home and work some more. So he's home by 4 and napping in his chair while I'm cooking, cleaning and tending to the kids. I don't sit down for a good rest until they are all in bed at 8.

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Both of us! I think it is about equal. It would just be lovely if we could have a break together sometime soon instead of one taking over so the other can sleep in etc.

Krista - posted on 03/02/2010

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It all depends on the day, really. There are some days when our baby is just a royal handful, and was up at 5:30 that morning, and didn't nap well, and by the end of the day, I'm a zombie. There are other days when he sleeps until 7am, eats, and then goes back to bed until 9:30, naps well, and is super easy to deal with.

Now, when I go back to work, things may change, as I'll probably still be responsible for getting the baby ready in the morning for daycare, plus I'll (hopefully, if I get the job I want) have a longer commute. So that that point, I'll probably be more in need of rest.

Sara - posted on 03/02/2010

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I think scorekeeping is a bad thing to do in a relationship, but we all do it! You both work hard, that's why you should work together to make the evenings go smoothly for both of you. My husband and I take turns making dinner and bathing the baby, though we both work full-time, so he can't give me any BS argument about who works harder.

Esther - posted on 03/02/2010

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It's pretty even between my husband and I. We both work full-time jobs and take care of Lucas when we're home. He does more of the housework because he works from home so it's easy for him to stick a load in in between conference calls (and we've hired someone to do the major cleaning so it's really just tidying up & laundry) and I am the one to get up every night when Lucas wakes up (yes, still, at 2 years old). Then I get Lucas ready in the morning but he takes him to daycare when I leave for the train. So still pretty even. I will say that my husband probably gets a bit more sleep than I do. He most definitely gets to sleep in more (I often go to bed earlier than he does though).

Dana - posted on 03/02/2010

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Honestly, my husband deserves a rest. I'd like to say me but when Matt's home Ethan is up his butt the ENTIRE time. So he really never gets a break. When I say up his butt, I mean it too, he won't even let me touch him when dad's around. Not kidding.

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