Women not GAY…just showing AFFECTION?!

♏*PHOENIX*♏ - posted on 08/07/2010 ( 17 moms have responded )

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Alright Ladies…….
Growing up it was very ok for us girls to comment on the way we look…”you are so pretty,” or “your body looks hot in that outfit,”
Some of us would also hold hands, and hug when we see each other at school, even kiss on the cheek (ive seen sum kiss on the lips, in high school) or at sleepovers we may sleep together…..ect, ect..pretty much we were touchy feely with one another and that was ok….no one looked at us and said …wow they are being gay….and those habits pretty much are acceptable all through our live.
Now that we are older we still comment on looks of another women without being worried someone will think we are homosexual…some of us have even made out with another woman at a bar or club, and yet we are still not labeled as gay….

Most cases you cant ask a man how a another man looks…..he either wont answer you or he say something like “I don’t comment on men’s looks,” but to me I know they know if a man is good looking or not, yet they wont say it…because they will prob be labeled as liking men or something….
“Real men don’t show affection to there guy friends” the way women do…Why is that??
I have to admit it would look a little odd to me to see men behaving the way women do when they see there friends, but that is only because im not use to seeing it……

That’s how it is here in the US…..How is affection displayed where your from….and why do you think its accepted they way it is….

Why is it more acceptable for girls to be this way, then boys??? When did it become ok for girls to display “Homosexual” tendencies but not be labeled as gay??

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Barbara - posted on 08/07/2010

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I wouldn't see those as "homosexual tendencies" at all. I think that humans, along with other animals, enjoy physical contact with other humans. I mean, I hug and kiss my mom, and I've even slept in bed with her as an adult. In no way would I consider that to be homosexual, and I don't think that most people would, either. So, if I hug and kiss my friends it falls under the same category of non sexual affection, to me anyway.
I think because homosexuality is so stigmatized in our culture people worry about how other people perceive them, especially the men. Most men, I should say. Some don't care. That doesn't mean they are "more gay" than other men, just means they aren't as worried about what other people think, IMO.

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Stifler's - posted on 08/08/2010

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It's men that label each other as "gay" for doing that. Bromance is in now though.

Charlie - posted on 08/08/2010

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Haha i always tease Jamie about his bromace with my sisters boyfriend .

Meghan - posted on 08/08/2010

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All the guys at my work are always joking about sleeping with each other and I have seen a few hug and grab ass...yeah my work is really a professional establishment. But I don't think all men are as "horrified" by affection as we think. Like Toni said, it may come with age and matuirty?

[deleted account]

My hubby and his mates comment on attractive men - some of the guys I know even have little bromances (when a guy loves another guy in a platonic way) going on. I never question their sexuality because of it. I think it is more of an issue in teenagers because they are not mature enough to see the difference and are more likely to judge.

Lucy - posted on 08/08/2010

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Both my husband and I are the huggy type- and although we are both straight we flirt with everybody! Like Jessica, we are theatre people, and in that context it is totally normal, and no reflection of your sexual preference.

When I thnk of blokes I know outside of the theatre industry, i guess they are a little less tactile with their male friends, especially the older ones, so maybe it is more of a generational thing. It would be nice to think that it is becoming more acceptable for blokes to show affection for each other platonically.

Lindsay - posted on 08/08/2010

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Josh hugs his friends too. Not every time they see each other but if it's someone he hasn't seen in a while or for a congrats or to comfort if something happened to one.

I also see him and his friends comment on looks or the way someone is dressed...it may not be "you look so handsome" but more like "you look sharp. who you trying to impress" or "dude, seriously, your look ridiculous".

Never once seeing him or his friends interact has it occurred to me to question his sexuality.

Charlie - posted on 08/08/2010

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They are not homosexual tendencies , just because its affection between the same sex ? thats ridiculous.

My fiance hugs his friends in fact all the men i know hug their friends .

Amie - posted on 08/08/2010

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Oh and the comments aspect.

My husband and his friends are more likely to say, looking good/sharp, then anything else if they notice one of them is dressed nicely.

Amie - posted on 08/08/2010

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Just because men don't show affection they way women do doesn't mean they don't show it.

My husband and I for instance. I'll give a "real" hug and a kiss on the cheek to a friend. My husband and his buddies, will give each other bear hugs, round the shoulder squeezes if it's an emotional time (there was a lot of these at our wedding), they punch each other, they tackle each other, they're all around a lot more rough then I am with my friends.

You can see the affection they have for each other though. They just show it in a different way.

I don't count any of this as homosexual tendencies though. If you're making out with someone, well then yea I can see that. I know only one woman who has done that though that was not bi or a lesbian.

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I just think that Chad is comfortable with who he is and his sexuality. He hugs other guys and I've even heard him comment on several occasions, "Hey, check out that guys pants. They look really good!" OR "Hey Dana, what are you staring at? I know he's hot but you have me!" lmao.

Men need to get over themselves.

Jessica - posted on 08/07/2010

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haha you need hang around some Theatre People, we all love to hug and be affectionate, whether male or female, straight or gay :) Alot less judging then the normal everyday person :)

[deleted account]

I know a lot of men that hug each other. None of them are gay. They definitely do a more 'manly hug' though. ;)

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