Would this have happened if it was a boy?

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Angela - posted on 10/21/2011

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I want to add I have been to China and have good friends who live there and are from there. They love their children and value them. Not all of China is the same. It is a big country about the same size as the USA.

I think some of you are being unfair to make generalisation stating high IQ not any EQ or they value excellence only.

I loved my visits to China, the people and the country. Now for the government.... no I have not much respect for them at all. They sell food, clothes, toys tainted with posin and the government allows for it. Also our governments allow to trade with them know this so shame on our governments too. Also human rights issues are huge in many areas. Again I feel an embargo should be hit on China until they clean up their act.

But know the people are good as a whole. At least all the people i met and stayed with. I was in Beijing and this is a big city so I can't speak for the whole country.

Keep in mind they still have the one child policy and most Chines value children very much boy or girl.

It is the poor areas that have the most problems you hear of with not wanting girls etc. But again poverty always seems to bring the worst out in humanity because it is just survival mode. Look at impoverished areas where we all live. You see the same lack of value for life.

The better off, educated Chinese love their kids and the kids tend to be very spoiled in many ways because often they are only children. That being said it is also common for these children to take care of their parents when they are older...My friend who just turned 30 has been saving money since she started working after university for her to be able to take care of her Mom and Dad.

So please do not think all Chinese are like this as a society.

Does anyone know what city, province this took place?

Denikka - posted on 10/23/2011

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I know this isn't going to be popular, but I feel the need to say it.

For all of those people who say that they would have stopped to help, would you have done it if it meant sacrificing your own child?

From what I read, there are no laws in China to protect people. In fact, if you stop and help, you are essentially taking on responsibility for the person that you're helping.

If you read into this a bit more, you'll learn a bit about Chinese law. If someone gets injured and dies, the person who caused that injury gets a one time fine of a relatively small amount (the $ I remember was something like $20,000 Yuen). Where as if the person lives and is just injured, the person is responsible for medical bills, distress and sometimes even has to pay later for potential lost wages (yea, injured as a toddler, but you still have to pay for them later in life).

Something like that can bankrupt a family.

The worst part is that even if you weren't the one who caused the injury, but were the one who stepped in to help, YOU could be the one held financially responsible.

The logic is that unless you caused it, only a crazy person would step in to help.



I don't blame those who walked by and did nothing. As horrible as it may be, I cannot condemn their choice.

Instead I choose to blace the blame on the parent who should have been watching her child more closely. And mostly on the government who is so broken and corrupt that they not only allow this to happen, they have forced it to become normal and acceptable.

Angela - posted on 10/23/2011

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wow some kind of learning experience for the little one Mary, not my kind of parenting!
Weird.
@Denikka I just want to clarify the that the USD is worth a little over 6 dollars for everyone 1 yuen not 20k! sorry but that is a huge oversight.
Also that law is not all over China and as stated i have friends who are from China and all were upset by this story, in fact the story ran in Chines Media also.
I saw not anywhere in the story how long the child was away from her mother and find it sad to blame her. I did see on the news how heartbroken she was. As I said my kid got out her windown at nap time, it could have been tragic and I would have blamed anyone who saw her and did not stop for help.
Again I know China is a mystery country for some but trust me they are not so different than the rest of the human race

Angela - posted on 10/23/2011

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Sarah, I agree about not question where her parents were.... but I think the people did not care... read my above post and you will see not just in China but everywhere people do not like to get involved. I am not sure of the reasoning of this at all.

Karla - posted on 10/22/2011

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This is a human condition... It's the reason CPR and First Aid training tells you to point to someone and say "you, in the red shirt, call 911." Too often too many people do not think it's their responsibility.



I'm so sorry for this family.

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Angela - posted on 10/25/2011

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I just wanted to give you all her name...Yueyue. The little girl died. I also wanted to share a link I found of the story where it shows her and her family before this tragedy.
I am glad the drivers of the vans were arressted and I stand by my statement no excuse to walk away despite what they say.
As I stated in the USA you can get sued too but what kind of person walks away from a bleeding child, in my mind a criminal.

Angela - posted on 10/25/2011

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Sorry Denikka, (btw I love your name!) Thanks for the clarification... I understand much better now and yes, that is a huge cost for anyone but on the human side of it, no excuse in my book. Authorities agreed and charged some of the people.
I have no idea how long the child was wandering and yes Mom should have had an eye on her. But as you said what a price to pay and the death of this child was totally preventable. The first driver ran her over! He stopped than ran her over... now he states he did not see her... very odd. I do think it is very possible the child was not gone for too long, It seems like an enternity on the tape but in reality it is just minutes. As I stated it is common in many areas to share the street and market path together. This in mind of course a driver should be aware of pedestrians.
Also here in NL people have drove on side walks, bike paths but not to matter what if you hit a pedestrian or biker you are at fault. Why because you as a driver hold the largest responsibility due to the fact your car vs. pedestrian on foot or bike is not fair. I am so aware of bikers here in Holland that I would hate myself if I hit one. Especially a child! It is horrifying really to think they hit the child and left... and it was due to concern for money.
This is very tragic, I agree the laws should change for good acts of humanity and help not just in China but anywhere.
I suppose I hope to just make sure people do not think all Chinese feel this was acceptable, in fact many were shocked and horrified. Many Chinese are excellent parents, people, and I truly have big love for the people and the country. I feel fortunate to have visited and have friends there.

Denikka - posted on 10/25/2011

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Just wanted to clarify, I did not put the $ amount in USD. I realize that the Chinese yuen is not equivalent to USD, which is why I put it in the original currency. Sorry if that confused anyone.

http://www.circleofmoms.com/debating-mum...

This is the post that I was referencing for my information.

“If she is dead, I may pay only about 20,000 yuan ($3,180),” the van driver told the China Daily before he surrendered to police. “But if she is injured, it may cost me hundreds of thousands of yuan.”

This passage in particular for the cost. 20,000 yuen, or $3,180 (which I would assume is in USD)

You cannot deny that the mother has SOME responsibility in this matter. It doesn't matter how heart broken she now is. I feel for her, I truly do. But with a child that young, you do NOT let them just wander off. I personally either have my child in a stroller or I am holding onto their wrist. She should have been more cautious against her child running off, and it's a lesson that she has now learned at a cost that is too high for any parent.
I did say that I place MOST of the blame on the government who has caused the fear in people against helping others.

Angela - posted on 10/23/2011

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Sorry just have to add this BTW in the USA you can sue someone for hurting you while giving you CPR for example.... this is similar to the law in China and the people used it as an EXCUSE, not good enough thus why the got in trouble with the law.

Mary Renee - posted on 10/23/2011

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@Angela, that's crazy no one stopped your two year old! I have been in that position twice. I live in Honolulu right now and was in Waikiki (a busy urban area) and I saw a little girl, about 2 probably crying her eyes out. I went up to her and tried to ask her where her parents were and she didn't speak English, so I was saying "Mama?" "Papa?" I stayed with her for at three minutes (which for me is an eternity for a child to be on their own. Walking around pointing to different adults in the area and then to the girl as if to say "Is she yours?" Finally I saw a man, who NEVER approached me, watching her. I looked at him and he smiled and laughed and said "Yeah, she's mine. She's in trouble for not listening." He had to be at least 30 feet away and the poor girl was bawling her eyes out 10 feet away from the street where she could have run at any minute. I can understand other people feeling foolish about looking for a kid's parents when the parents are watching you the whole time, but honestly I just feel like the parents are jack asses for not speaking up.

Janice - posted on 10/23/2011

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That is absolutely HORRENDOUS! How could all those people not help an injured child! I too try not to "get involved" but I have also seen a wandering child and stayed close by until I figured out who they were with. There is no way I wouldn't stop to help an injured toddler who had no one else around.

Angela - posted on 10/23/2011

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@Mary yes, I mean we all are use to the horrible traffic in DC but too many times I have seen road rage etc but this was beyond my scope of lack of empathy for the man. I was ashamed for the people doing this so much.
Glad you father tried to help. I know I would help. I say this because I have done so. I just react first and think later I suppose.
This reminds me of an indicent that happen to me when I lived in a large apt. complex in Raleigh, North Carolina. My daughter Samantha was just 2 years old at the time. We had these long window that went to the ground. It was nap time. I went to check on her and saw the window screen out the window, and soon saw my dog and child was gone...via window.
I freaked out, called 911 as I ran frantically out the door calling her name and the dog. Their was a huge pond and I worried she had drowned in it...
So I start asking any human have you seen a little girl and a dog... givign a brief description... most people did not see her. Which is strange right...but a man stood out in paticular at the time. He said yes...I was like where is she... he said they went that way pointing down the road. Soon the cops arrived, the ambulance and fire dept! A police man found her in a near by park with our dog, she told the police man she was going to McDonalds. We always walked this way to get a ice cream and fries as a treat. She remembered the way.
So good news all was okay but when all settled down I thought about the guy and wondered why the hell he did not stop a 2 year old and a dog alone from walking down a busy street!
Not one person saw her??? I find that hard to believe. No one stopped her.

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I don't know what the hell happened here.All i know is people did not have the heart to do something and thats pure evil in my eyes.They should feel ashmad, there are no excuses people either.I



know 100% in my heart i would not of looked and done nothing.I would of seen that child as my own in a sense..would i leave my child to be hurt and look on?..No way in hell.



If you had a heart you would not even hesitate to run and help.



**I did not watch this, i heard about it from others but my other half warned me to not look at the video if it was posted on fb.He was so upset over it.Really upset.He didn't even tell me until i asked him if he heard about it.:-(

Mary Renee - posted on 10/22/2011

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@Angela, I'm from DC and it's shocking that someone would yell "jump" to a suicidal person. I guess that just proves that this kind of desensitization can happen anywhere. I feel like people in the Washingtonian area are used to traffic so that shouldn't have made them lose their minds, although that doesn't excuse it.

My dad (who still lives in DC) was riding his bike on one of the bike paths when something caught his eye. He stopped his bike. A person had accidentally rode off the bike path off the bridge and was lying below. He called an ambulance and tried to climb down to the man but he couldn't get there with out falling himself. Turns out the guy was dead anyway. But he did everything he could and still wishes he could have done more.

Mary Renee - posted on 10/22/2011

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I think at such a young age they wouldn't be able to know if it was girl or a boy.

It is very difficult for me to imagine this happening... And a lot of times when I hear people say "Oh, I would have done this, or I would have done that" I think it's bullshit because you don't really know unless you were there. But in this case, I'm 100% certain that there is no way in hell I would have walked by. I've been on the playground with my daughter and I've helped stranger's kids when they get stuck on top of the monkey bars or scrape their knees. I've stopped if I seen a kid by themselves and waited until their parents were found. I don't have the "just walk by" gene in my body... if that's what it's called. Maybe I just wasn't raised that way.

This is just incrediably hard for me to take in. That poor poor child, I just hope that the shock was enough that her body blocked her from feeling any pain. All I can think is of her looking up like any child would, for Mama or Papa or SOMEONE to help her and no one stopping.

So terrible. Has anyone interviewed the rubbish collector? His life will never be the same either.

Sarah - posted on 10/22/2011

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It wasn't for a few seconds with this girl though was it.........her mother was nowhere around for a long time.....
I guess it's different in China though, I just found it strange that no-one had questioned where the parents were for such a long time.

Angela - posted on 10/21/2011

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In China their is always big street markets etc and people and cars share the same roads the markets are on...
The Mom dropped off laundry and the little girl wondered away while she was doing so. I can say I can see how this could happen. I have had my toddlers run off or hide on me in just a few seconds. ....of course causing me utter panic.

Sarah - posted on 10/21/2011

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It's such a sad story, I just watched the whole video and it's horrific.

I'm sure not all Chinese people would have walked on by.......it is very shocking and disturbing that so many did though.
One thing I can't understand is why a 2yr old was wandering through the street on their own in the first place...........

Hopefully, this will be a wake up call to people that you shouldn't just turn a blind eye when someone needs help.......

Angela - posted on 10/21/2011

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I think it could have happen to a boy or girl. I think it is shocking and yes I think they just did not want to get involved. I think many do not care. That it is a child makes many feel more shocked including me.
I have no idea what is happening is society.
When I lived in DC a man was contemplating suicide by jumping off the a large bridge that is always busy. Traffic was at a stand still, and people we screaming to the man to jump... it was awful.
I have no answer to this type of thing except I am glad I am not a person like that.
My daughter Samantha actaully told me this story over the weekend... She was so upset of it. I am glad people are outraged and it made the news or I would be more worried about society.

Charlie - posted on 10/20/2011

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Thats the problem high IQ very, VERY low EI :(

This is cultural desensitivity coupled with theri absurd laws where people in the past have been charged if the hurt person dies ( We are protected in Australia by the good samaritan law )

Iridescent - posted on 10/20/2011

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They are - book smart only. I'm not saying they are not intelligent. I am saying that their system of education pushes so hard that they must learn amazing amounts of information by a young age, plus playing instruments with impressive skill, and multiple other items. They do not value children as children. They value excellence only.

Iridescent - posted on 10/20/2011

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It's so cold hearted. Next thing you know, they'll charge the 2 year old with being hit.

Merry - posted on 10/20/2011

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Oh good God. No wonder no one helped the poor dear. At least someone could have called 911 and kept walking! (pr whatever the Chinese equivalent to 911 is)

Iridescent - posted on 10/20/2011

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I think yes, it would have happened regardless of gender. Chinese are beginning to value girls more because they're struggling to find wives for their sons after so many years of gender preference. The biggest explanation I saw regarding why she was left there was because it's become a society of fear - Good Samaritans are charged with bringing injured people to the hospital, regardless of gender, as though they had perpetrated the crime themselves. So now they ignore it.

Merry - posted on 10/20/2011

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Wow. That's awful. Usually I'd expect anyone would jump to help a baby or child but I can't imagine people ignoring a toddler like that.

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