
Diane - posted on 09/17/2012 ( 149 moms have responded )
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It's all he thinks about and talks about with his friends. I had to enforce a time limit for him on the computer unless it's homework or typing practice and was called the meanest Mum in the world. Then his friends phone up and he pleads with me to let him play with them..He gets on the phone with them and they all play together. I have talked to the other parents and we are trying to schedual a time of 7-8pm to all play together. I have told him this is providing all homework and chores are done....He is NOT a happy camper!!
When he is not on it he expects me to entertain him and play games with him, which I don't mind at all, however I cannot play with him every minute in order to fill the mindcraft gap.
He is an only child and I am a single Mum. There are no children on the street to hang with. He has lost interest in all the things he used to do to keep busy... Any suggestions would be greatly appreciated....
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The - posted on 09/04/2013
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You know what, all you parents just don't understand( don't delete me) about kids, you only think about that your child is addicted, but not why are they addicted. I could understand that you are worried, but this a psychological problem not a everyday problem(I'm not saying your child is crazy). Though I know you are going to delete my account, but just listen to me.
I know some of you are getting close to the answer, but you're still a foot away.
First of all , when I look at all these problems they have almost one common thing
"single mom", which are the problem sometimes, because most kids have a anxiety when their parents are divorced, which cause them to escape their own lives and try to go into a virtual world where everyone is happy and so is the player.
Secondly, if you are not a "single mom" then its your mom system having a flaw, because through the cases I seen is that limiting video games wouldn't fix the problem, but most of these parents thinks it does. The correct way is to challenge the brain and making getting to play harder, which many of you tried, but have you ever heard of making it a homework? Its a bit difficult to understand, but its the best way to not make the kids go into a tempter tantrum.
To do this, use minecraft as a architecture system and work with your child at planning what to build on the free time when he plays the game. By doing this you could train a habit of being ready before you do something, and if you still want to limit your child's play time then use the homework points as a indication of how much he plays when its his time to play. For instance:
100%= 1h 30m
85-99%=1h 10m
75-85%=1h 00m
60-75%=45m
50-60%=35m
45-50%=25m
35-40%= 15m
25-35%=10m
15-25%=5m
5-15%=00m
With this system the only one limiting your children are themselves.
If you want more tips(even if I'm a kid) then just reply back!
Ahlmann - posted on 04/19/2013
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Stop and think about this for a second, seeing it from the child's perspective (I can relate as a parent as I was 11 years and addicted to videogames back then). The child has been told, ordered and controlled what to do since it can remember, wether it's at school, by parents, if it's good for the child or not doesn't matter, that's its experience . The child doesn't know any different in its world, except when it's allowed to play.
Now consider this, another world appears for the child, with endless possibilities and freedom to explore, create, learn, experience, with the interactive world, with friends. The way adult human living should be weren't it for all the restrictions, conditioning and framing of our (adult) minds, the exact restricting, conditioning and framing that goes on in the child's experience of which it doesn't have the freedom to choose, it is forced upon, so it is completely natural to break free and Minecraft supplies that possibility.
Now the task of the parent is to put this all in perspective for the child, because the parent can know all this, but the child can not, only on a deeper level of intuititive understanding, the parent must supply the cognitive, even if it will undermine their authorative position; as teenagers hit puberty they will rebel anyway and eventually, but to know why makes all the difference.
I see a lot of great solutions in the comments of parents combining what they think is best for the child with the child's choices to do what it want to do. Parenting is about control, and the ever slightly diminishing level of it a parent has over a child, the more the parent tries to keep control, the more the child will suffer in conflicts, escapism etc. There are reasons a child gets addicted to videogames, for the child its about survival of self in an escaped world of freedom, and taking that away or restricting it beyond the child's ability to have fun, ánd not taking care of the reasons that started it all, will damage the child immensely, when it's all about jus trying to clear the path a bit for the child for it to become a strong individual who can take care of itself and others.
JonoOrchard - posted on 04/16/2013
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hi, I'm a dad, married with 2 kids
my 11 yr old son is addicted to MC also. He would play it 24hrs a day if possible.
I have taken the 'join them' approach and got myself a MC account $35 usd I think. And play with him and his friends. I've also set him up with his own server where he makes the rules and controls his friends access. It did take a little bit of tech know how, but know that its running its pretty awesome......This approach has caused my son to be so passionate about MC that he wants to write and design his own games. This hobby, albeit a little annoying when his ears dont work when playing MC,,,,(and various other symptoms) are minor compared to the passion and drive he has established early in life which he's now starting to apply this 'feeling' to a more practical and productive future in the IT world.
Julie - posted on 03/05/2013
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My 11 year old TOLD ME he was "addicted" to Mine craft. The thing is, I don't let him play that often.
My boys have to "EARN SCREEN TIME" with equal amounts of physical exercise, or additional chorus on top of daily responsibilities. 15 MIN per chorus can be earned, and they can only play up to one hour at a time.
Play dates or "XBOX play dates, are a bit more flexible, but this gets them coming to me "Mom, what can I do to help"
Does he read 20 minutes a day? He should be, make that his first earned time, after 20 mins of reading, he can have 20 minutes of Minecraft
I set a timer...I find 30 minutes on the game is best, after an hour they get mood changes and aggravated. Just know you are not alone. get it under some control now, because I think it will only get worse into the teenage years
David - posted on 06/25/2013
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Video (computer) games are the nemesis of our time. While it teaches our children to be comfortable with being social on the computer, which is a must in the business world, they also create people that only want to exist in a fantasy world. I empathize with the fact that your son is an only child and you are a single mum and that there are no other children his age in the neighborhood. Introduce him to books. When he is in the down time of his computer, it can keep him occupied and works on the imagination skills that computer games are destroying.