my daughter is 7 month old,she can only sleeping when she in my arms,is that normal?

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Monica - posted on 11/10/2008

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I went through this with my daughter at 5 months.... I loved holding her and letting her sleep in my arms however with a then demanding 2 year old to tend to, it wasn't always possible. I paid a baby consultant for help, cos i couldn't bear to hear her cry.... well consistency is the key... if you let her cry one time then not the next, then baby may have a harder time adjusting. the method suggested to me was "controlled crying".... you set a time you are comfortable with, say 5 minutes and let her cry in her crib, then go back to reassure her and put her back in the crib, repeat this over and over untill she falls asleep. Do this every nap and bedtime and in 3 days your baby will be settling herself to sleep and you will have more energy to play and enjoy every wakeful moment with her!! (wait for your baby to be in good health before trying this method) It worked for me. Good luck. Whatever you decide to do, go with your heart and what you can manage. If we divided our lifetime into a pie chart the first year of our child's life would be the size of a toohpick!! Such a short time span in our life, so mange the best way you can and enjoy your baby, before we know it they will all be running off to school.... :)

Angelina - posted on 10/27/2008

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Hi Alinie! Not sure if you have tried this but I hold my son who is 7 months old and give him a soft blanket to put next to his face to cuddle. He likes this and goes right to sleep usually. I will rock, walk or do whatever I feel like doing, nothing in particular, mainly hold him and then he can be laid in his crib with that blanket and he is all cozy and sleeping. Just a suggestion in case you haven't tried it yet. I usually have the blanket bunched up between me and him so his head is on most of that and parts of his body still cuddles near me. Good Luck!

Genna - posted on 11/07/2008

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Totally normal! Believe me my son does the same thing, I think they are just a tad bit spoiled. You can try to break them of it by putting then to sleep in your arms and then carefully laying them in their crib and if they wake up pat there back or stroke their cheek till they fall back asleep.

Donna - posted on 11/03/2008

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We recently got a vicks vaporizer for our room and that seems to help. She falls asleep now with much less fuss and sleeps deeper through the night, so it's a very worthwhile investment. :) If it helps you and your daughter then I'm glad and if not, at least you'll breathe easier.

Jessica - posted on 11/02/2008

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I just read to the end of the thread... if you want to try a different route than the cry it out route you should really check out Dr Sears. "Crying it out" does not work for all babies, if she is crying for hours that is not healthy. Don't harden your heart to her crying, it upsets you as a mother for a reason.

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Alinie - posted on 11/11/2008

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it's been the third day Maaly sleeping not in my arms,she still sleeps in my bed with me and my husband , after 8 now ..i just go to our room and play with her in my bed until she fall asleep by her self and after that i can slowly left her alone,the 1st day she fall asleep in my stomach,hehehe,well it's a big step for us....hopefully later on she can sleep by her own in her crib but for now it's good enough for me. ;)

Heather - posted on 11/10/2008

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Yes its normal some babies just have a comfort zone being in your arms my son is 8 months old and if he can't feel me touching him he wont fall asleep..his daddy can't even put him to bed unless he is extremely tired..So don't worry about it..

[deleted account]

Terrance will need to fall asleep on someone to sleep in his crib, but for naps he wakes up the second you try and move him into his playpen or crib. It's a matter of trying and trying and trying till finally he goes to sleep and stops fighting the nap. It's hard and heartbreaking but I know he's going to have to sleep on his own sooner than later.

Kirstine - posted on 11/06/2008

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hi alinie me eldesest daughter is now 4 years old but when she was a baby she went through a phase of not going to sleep unless i was holding her,yes it is normal to me id say its just one of them things they do. they will grow out of it as they get bigger they start wanting to get comfy by them selfs.it could also just be a safe zone for her to be in your arms where she feels safest the most

User - posted on 11/06/2008

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"Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child" is a wonderful book! I have an 8 month old and he goes to sleep in his own for all naps and at night. It is a lot of work. The method in the book I used was to let him cry. It's really hard and you have to stick with it for a week or so, but it's totally worth it. You only let them cry for up to an hour. If they don't go to sleep, you try the next day. After a while, they get the hang of it. Get some earplugs so that it's not so painful! :)

Lauren - posted on 11/05/2008

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I also HIGHLY recommend the book Healthy Sleep Habits Happy Child..I've been using it since my daughter was 4 months old and she is now a fantastic sleeper. She goes down for naps and to bed each night without a fight, I literally put her down and walk out of the room and she goes to sleep on her own...the best part is she sleeps from 7pm to 7am every night! It didn't start out that way though..it was a lot of work on my part in the beginning to stick with it and to be consistent but it has paid off 100%. She's a happy baby and a great sleeper because of it! There's not a better time to start than now..best of luck!

Christine - posted on 11/04/2008

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Yes, and no....she has TRAINED you to hold her to sleep....and now she requires it. She is unable to self sooth therefore needs you. If you put her down and she cries....try for a minute, then 3, then 5 and then you will see it will get less and she will learn to fall asleep by herself. good luck

Julianne - posted on 11/03/2008

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Have you tried running a fan or a white noise machine in her bedroom? Both of my daughters have trouble sleeping without that noise in the background.

Jessica - posted on 11/02/2008

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Check out Dr. Sears The Fussy Baby Book and you will find lots of company and maybe some techniques/advice that could ease your situation. I couldn't lay my girl down to sleep until 3.5 or 4 months. I had to lay with her and side nurse until she was asleep and then roll away... now I can even put her in her crib for naps! However, if nothing works and you have to hold her try and enjoy it, as hard as it may be, because all to soon she won't need you to and you'll miss it.

Donna - posted on 10/30/2008

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My daughter has started doing this too. :) For her it's a combination of teething and this cold she has. So I hold her until she falls asleep and then wait another 5 or 10 minutes to be sure and then put her down in her crib. Sometimes it works and sometimes it doesn't. It seems to be a rather common thing at 7 months. I've been reading up on it and well, it happens! I know we've all given you ideas but what it comes down to is what you're comfortable with. If anything works then I'm happy for you. Sleepless nights with a crying baby are very hard. So keep trying. It'll work out. :)

Stacy - posted on 10/30/2008

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I know it is hard to hear your children cry, but you need to put her down and let her learn to self soothe. My doctor told me after I had my daughter that after she finished nursing or drinking a bottle to put her down. She will cry. It will go on for awhile, but both of you will benefit once she learns to soothe herself to sleep. She will be okay.

Sarah - posted on 10/30/2008

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Get earplugs. And let her cry. DO NOT give in! In a week she should be sleeping through the night in her own bed! You know that she is safe in her crib...she isn't going anywhere! And you hear her so you know she is alive!

Christina - posted on 10/29/2008

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Alinie -

I would agree with Kim. Normal doesn't apply when discussing sleeping habits. Everyone does what works for them. I would suspect that you are searching for some advice to help ease this habit of her only sleeping in your arms? My son has developed similar dislike for falling asleep alone, but we do our best only giving in occasionally in the morning. For us, we don't want to encourage his dependancy, so we can all have our space needed to sleep comfortably. Again, this is only for us. You can find some tactics that might work for you. I would suggest the Baby Whisper.

Torrie - posted on 10/29/2008

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Alinie,
Some children are spoiled yes...and some are not...each parent makes the decissions that are best for their situation. If you have been fortunate enough that you enjoyed staying home with your daughter then you are one of the few that get to enjoy that. My 2 year old sleeps with us most of the time...we put him back in his own bed when he is asleep and he will wake up later and crawl back in bed with us. This did not start until after his sister was born and moved into the same room as him. We do try to get him to sleep in his own bed, but at some point we need to sleep to, and unfortunately that means he is in our bed. If your daughter naps when you are holding her but not if you lay her down, that is something that you gradually work on...don't be discouraged by people telling you she is spoiled...even spoiled babies adjust to different routines. Just try to lay her down and let her fuss..a few min will not hurt her...gradually wait longer to go back in and check on her..don't pick her up just pat her and reassure her that you are still there and then slowly stop patting and just tell her she is ok...then you can go to just walking in her room...I think you will be able to soon have her broke of this habit...it just takes time!!

Charmaine - posted on 10/28/2008

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My daughter used to be the same. I started off by putting a blanket under her matress so she sunk in a bit and put blankets over her nice thin ones. She then stopped using her dummy and got clinggy to my pj tops and my vest tops. I then took away the blankets from underneath but wrapped it around her sides (she hates having them tucked in). It worked a treat. Now all she has is a snuggly blanket with a bear on top and has her blankets. she hates sleeping bags.

Courtney - posted on 10/28/2008

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Hi there

I must say I agree with the others...I dont think normal really applies when it comes to little bubs...hehehehe!!

I think at around 7 months babies become even more clingy due to separation anxiety so its almost like learning to settle them all over again!!

I know with my little one at times she is exactly the same...trying to get her to settle herself is probably your best option...however if it becomes to hard Im a firm believer in doing what you feel is best for you and for bubs and if that means settling her in your arms then so be it!!

I hope that helps a little bit

love and light

xo

Caroline - posted on 10/27/2008

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I had the same problem as well. Once my baby boy sleeps, I gently put him in his crib and it works.

If you try to put your baby to sleep in her crib and she starts crying, just reassure her that you are there. Leave the room and to back to see her 5 minutes after. Reassure her again, then leave again for another 5 minutes. Do that as may as you can and take longer time to go back to see her (10 minutes after 3 times and so on...) until she falls asleep.

Kim - posted on 10/27/2008

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Be careful about making her too warm though. That and other factors can contribute to SIDS.

Jennifer - posted on 10/27/2008

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Probably b/c she likes the warmth of mommy!Try layering her clothes or wrapping her in a warm blanket before you lay her down......

Torrie - posted on 10/27/2008

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I have had this happen with some of the babies I had in daycare, I found the easiest way for them to transition was to have them sleep in their carseat next to me...then gradually I put them in thier playpens still in the carseat...after they got used to that then I laid them in the playpen..they seemed to do better that way...hope it is helpful for you

Kim - posted on 10/27/2008

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Alinie they always seem to win don't they?? Haha! At some point it is just a matter of you getting some sleep. I would have all 3 of mine in the bed with me and I would be sleeping hanging off the edge... but I got some sleep that way :) Best of luck!

[deleted account]

what seemed to work with my baby was putting one of my shirts in her crib, and laying her on it. It smelled like me so she seemed to transition really well. I would also wrap her tight in a blanket before I layed her down so she felt like she was being held.

Alinie - posted on 10/26/2008

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well Kayla, i tried to put her in her crib last night and i let her cried,u know what we also had no luck yet since she ended up crying until 3 in the morning and i was too tired so i took her again,and she slept directly(hahahahah,she won again)so have to keep trying!!!Good luck to u 2.

[deleted account]

I am having the same problem right now with my 7 month old. He will go to sleep on his own during the day and when he is going to bed at night. However, he is teething extremely bad right now (four teeth at one time) so he wakes up in the middle of the night and wants to sleep in my arms. As soon as he falls alseep again I put him back in his crib. But as soon as I am out of the room he wakes up again and cries for me to pick him up. I don't know what to do. I tried just letting him cry for a little while see if her would go back to sleep on his own, but no luck.

I am going to try some of the things that you ladies suggested and hopefully it will work. Good luck to you Alinie, I hope we can both get our kids out of this pattern!

Alinie - posted on 10/25/2008

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wow...i will try to do the things that u guys suggested tonight,hope it will work...

[deleted account]

i had that problem with my first he is now three, and the thing with falling asleep in your arms is that it is tight warm and secure and you might even pat them. So what i did was wrap him tightly in a shawl place him in his cot and pat him for a short while just till the eyes closed then i would prop something against him to make it feel like i was still there its a sure winner well it was for me!! good luck and what ever happens there is no wrong way about it as long as its what you and your baby want thats all that counts!

Chris - posted on 10/24/2008

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I was having this same problem and the end result was that my baby girl, Reese would end up sleeping in our bed at night. I would try to have her sleep in her crib and she would not fall asleep on her own. Everytime I tried, I would eventually give up because all she would do is cry and cry. On Monday I started a new thing though and it sounds really silly but we are on day 5 now and it worked! We do our normal bedtime things, bath, pj's, bottle, play with toys, read a book and then I put her in the crib. The first night I sat right next to the crib but wouldn't look at her. Just so she would know I was there and every night I sit closer and closer to the door. It is working and I am sooo happy! It calms her down and she goes to sleep in her own crib now. I can't believe it. We have our bed to ourselves again!

[deleted account]

We have been fortunate not to have that issue, but my SIL did with her first. I agree, probably a good time to begin transitioning. I've found the swing useful in transitioning. :)

Donna - posted on 10/24/2008

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We had almost the same problem. For the longest time Alyss would only fall asleep while we were holding her, and sometimes that's still the only way to get her to sleep, but we've found that just piling her blankets around her in the crib will help her fall asleep too. :)

Alinie - posted on 10/23/2008

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thanks for the input...yeah every now and then i tried to put her in her own bed,sometimes it works but most of the time it's not,so i guess i have to keep on trying then. i will try to look for the the book Healthy sleep that u recommended,i hope it will help!

Leigh Ann - posted on 10/23/2008

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I agree. I have twins, so letting them sleep in my arms is not an option. The book Healthy Sleep habits happy Child is a great reference.

Sigrun - posted on 10/23/2008

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Hi! I also have that with mine only during the day she only sleeps in my arms
at night she sleeps in her cot. when she was 4 months during the night she was also sleeping in my arms so I got a support pillow and surrounded myself with pillows! then she got used to sleeping in her cot!

Kim - posted on 10/23/2008

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Every baby is different so I dont think normal really applies :) It would probably be a good idea to transition her from that though. You would have more time to do other things too.

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