how do i deal with a 2yr old that hits you??

Kimberly - posted on 08/20/2009 ( 4 moms have responded )

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my daughter madison ges really frusturated when usay no 2 hr and she just starts punchingu and headbutting youwe ave tried timeout but she just kicks the wall

4 Comments

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Brittney - posted on 01/19/2010

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try putting the little one in the crib by themself as long as he does not climb out for a time out. thats what i did with my daughter and she just stopped hitting me. It gave me time to decompress so that I didn't act on instinct... and smack her back as it would not teach her anything good in my opinion.

Liz - posted on 10/06/2009

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Two is the hardest age! When my son was two he would hit and chuck tantrums, and we werent really consistant with him and now he is four and when he gets really tired he reverts back to that sort of behaviour whereas with our daughters who are almost 2 and 3 we are a lot more consistant and they have got the message quickly. It is really tiring and hard but the kids know that I am the boss now and when I say no I mean no. Make sure if you say no dont change. If she starts hitting her, remove her from where you are and just let her know that you dont want to be around her when she does things like that to you, and when she is ready to calm down and apologise to you, that you will be right there. Kids are a lot smarter than given credit for and will use any situation to their advantage, so make sure you are consistant and that you and your partner are on the same page or she will play the two of you against each other (my son learnt that one quickly too)

Krista - posted on 10/06/2009

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maybe teaching her sign language? Donielle is right, your daughter probably can't express herself. I do think that time outs work tho, if done right. Put her there and don't react when she kicks the wall. She won't hurt the wall, might hurt herself, but then she'd learn. A minute of time out per age of kid.

Good luck

Donielle - posted on 08/27/2009

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Hello Kimberly,

I know exactly what you are going through. My son doesn't act out quite like that but he has his temper tantrum moments. He is two also and at that age kids not only test the waters, they develop a better understanding of the word "no." Also, they are learning about new emotions and find it very difficult to express themselves at times. So, when you tell your daughter no, she understands she won't be getting what she wants. Instead of her telling you she's hurt, sad or angry....she kicks, screams and hits. I know it can be extremely frustrating but you have to help her verbalize her emotions or act them out in another way. When you tell her no and she acts out, grab her hand and say "we don't hit. mommy understands that you are upset or hurt but we do not hit....it's not nice." Then give her a hug and say "mommy loves you" until she calms down. Time out for a two year old, especially when they are that upset, doesn't really work. That isn't helping them deal with their emotions. You have to walk them through it and teach them how to behave and react. It is a long and frustrating process but it does get better. Good Luck Mom!!!

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