when race is pressed upon ur child

Copa - posted on 11/07/2009 ( 2 moms have responded )

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i have a 12,10,4 and 3mo.old i ahve never played ur black and that's it game with my kids yet my daugther who's father and i are no longer together gos for a visit and comes home and tells me i'm otlike you i'm white and i would like it if u address me in that manner i was in sock at first but i had to walk away and come back and ask my child why would you say that she stated her dad said that even though ur mom is black ur not see u have fair skin and hair like mine u look more like me then her anyways i was extremley upset along with my husband who is also white and we talkedto her more later after she had went tobed i called her dad and ased what are you thinking by telling her this crapp i have taught her to embrasse ur heritage and be proud of whom u are yet in a two week visit you have destroyed that and his words were so tell what would you do i this situation.

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Kelsey - posted on 12/18/2009

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I am sorry to hear this my son is Filipino and white. He is extremely fair skin and blond hair blue eyes. even at a year and half i try to show him the culture of his fathers side. if i was in your situation i would have to sit my child down and explain to him or her that yes they have fair skin and that they look similar to her father but white is not their only background and that they should be proud of their ancestor and where they come from both sides. i am extremely sorry to hear about your situation though

Angelia - posted on 12/07/2009

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I am sorry that you have to go through that with your x but I know that just reassuring her that her heritage of both races will help her to understand that both are as important as the next, being she is part both.. I have to deal with some of the same issues with my family members.. but I can distant myself and my children from them. But I know that our children see the difference in us as their parents. I never point out color in our family but our children, maybe it comes from school, but they have said that they are black and white.. They are very lite skinned and some think they are purterican. But sometimes we just have to talk to them and let them know that everyone is different and we don't have to point that out to anyone. We don't pick family or friends by their apperances.. just keep your head up and encourage her to know both back grounds..

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