Disrespectful 21-year-old daughter

Sandy - posted on 04/13/2017 ( 1 mom has responded )




OK here I go my daughter was a travel softball player I spent every single cent I had as a single mom running her all over the country I've always done everything for my kids and no help from their father which I am divorced from I feel like at 21 my daughter is acting like a teenager should be acting towards me she doesn't help around the house every time I ask her to do something it's an argument. When she was a teenager we were extremely close inseparable and got a long wonderful she went away to college for a couple years did not finish came back home I learned that she's going through changes that I don't understand but I'm trying hard to work with her on such as being bisexual her best friend is turning from a girl to a boy and I feel like it's causing a lot of influence on her we fight and argue all the time about everything she's already failed twice moving out and now wants to run away to Tennessee with this friend 8 to 10 hours away from home her father is totally cruel and mean to her her brother is not much better I've tried to be so supportive but I get nothing but disrespect and rudeness. I know she's going through a lot with trying to figure out who she is but I should not get the flak from her after all I've done and continue to do for her she lives there rent free she doesn't pay for any groceries all she does is sit down in her basement and never comes up and visit with me anymore all she cares about is her friends and pushes me and my boyfriend of 10 years aside she's very immature and rude and disrespectful and all we do is argue I don't understand what I'm doing wrong 😔


Ava - posted on 04/30/2017




I'm a nanny not a mom but perhaps I can help. Chances are you are not doing anything wrong, it seems like you always have tried your best. I was having trouble with the oldest child in the family and started to do some research on communication with teens. To get results you have to go at conversations in a non-confrontational way, this would work especially well with her because you no longer have to discipline her ( This method was working well until I just had to ground her and the progress slowed but she had started to talk to me without being forced to and in a more cheerful manor). It's all about how you start a conversation. Ask her if there is anything you can do to help her figure out what she is doing next etc. When you start an open dialogue things will get better. If she starts an argument calmly tell her you are not in the mood to argue and walk away. Hang in there, you're trying your best.

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