homebirth confusion

Rebecca - posted on 04/15/2009 ( 6 moms have responded )

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i had my 1st son on a midwifry unit, id never even heard of homebith till after when i saw homebith diarys on day time tv. i knew straight away i wanted one with my next child. when i got pregnant again i booked a homebirth straight from the off. id just got to the last 6 week target where you can have one and all homebirths were cancelled in my area because of a shortage of midwifes. i was extremely upset so my midwife sugested i refuse to go in on the day, i did this and they sent out midwifes. but now i dont know if i enjoyed the experience or not its something i dont find joy in talking about like i thought i would i feel the whole thing was ruined for me.

6 Comments

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Shana - posted on 09/17/2010

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I had never considered a homebirth because I didnt want one - I cant now put a reason why it just wasnt for me. Then my 2nd son was born at home unplanned and unassisted - well my hubby caught him.He was born in under 6minutes of labour, i went into shock before he was born so i remeber less than nothing. His delievery resulted in very very painful tearing.I dont know it was all connected but he wouldnt breast feed properly, and i ened up with post-natal depression - i am sure its not related but it seemed like one thing going wrong after another.
To be honest after my experience I would not recommend an unassisted planned birth at home. That being said, you should be able to have more say over your birthing - lets face it the saying goes "healthy happy mamma = healthy happy bubba" and that should start at the start ie labour/pregnancy not when bubba is already here

Cierra - posted on 09/15/2009

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Did you not like the midwives they sent? Did you even know them? Have you ever considered going unassisted?

Jenne - posted on 08/07/2009

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The Solace for Mothers online community is available for debriefing and connecting with other women who have been hurt or disappointed by their birth experiences. The link is www.solaceformothers.org.

I'm always sad when I hear that somehow the system has somehow undermined the joy and power of a birth experience. And why is it so often the system that is responsible for that? I'm sorry you felt let down. You are not the first mother from the UK I've heard saying that midwife shortages are affecting quality of care.

[deleted account]

When did this happen rebecca?

I am a doula in the UK and it is very important to go through a proper de brief of your birth expereince or you can be left with negative throughts about how the whole event went and sometimes once they are talked though properly you feels loads better and understand why certain things happened as they did.

it doesn't dound like you had a terrible expereince but http://www.sheilakitzinger.com/BirthCris... have a phone line which is really helpful to talk about anything that is borthering you about the birth expereince.

Also you did well to demand a home birth. The not having enough staff is a very naughty trick that hospitals and NHS trusts play with women who are very emotionally vulnerable at this late stage in their pregnancy. When it is their duty of care to be with you wherever you choose to have your baby

If you still feel you want someone to talk through things with then please feel free to PM me (if you can via this site)

Rach

Rebecca - posted on 05/21/2009

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I live in england so its run by the nhs and not a private practice. here you can go private for any medical reason except births.

[deleted account]

Where did you have your Homebirth? ( I mean what country or state)? Are the Homebirth's and Midwives run by the government? That sounds strange that a Midwife did not have a backup...but it sounds like a group or hospital situation than private practice?



I'm sorry you feel like someone else ruined such a beautiful moment in a lifetime. But, your picture shows a happy, smiling Mom/Baby Dyad. :)

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