17 year old girl dating drug dealer. Best course of action?

Amanda - posted on 12/28/2012 ( 1 mom has responded )

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I stare at the caption and cannot believe that this is happening to me. I have a beautiful 17 year old daughter. My husband and I - her biological parents - are still very much together and really happy - our first priority was and always is to provide our children with a stable home, giving them freedom to express themselves (within limits) I would say we were not overly strict or overly liberal - we really tried our best to keep a balance

This week I found out that during the past year, she has slept with five guys. She is hanging out with stoners and her current boyfriend deals in all kinds of drugs and uses occasionally as well. (Her friends and boyfriend are all with her in the same school.)

Get this - the boyfriend is not a loser, punk-ass as you may immediately presume. This guy is currently in his final year of school - a brilliant A grade student working towards being accepted into medical school!!!! If you look at him you would not suspect it at all!!! Their relationship is also sexual.

I learnt this from my son's girlfriend in whom my daughter confides. My daughter and myself always had a very good relationship -still have and i approached her very diplomatically about her sex life and her involvement in drugs. She admitted to me that she slept with 4 guys and that she occasionally smokes weed. When i asked her if she is sleeping with her new boyfriend - she blatantly lied to my face - she does not know that i know about his dealing - because i do not want her to see my sons girlfriend as the one who ratted her out - as this is not the case - they are very concerned for her.

I really do not know how to handle this situation. i am Christian and I am on my knees the whole time - I trust that God will sort this out - but I am just so confused about what the logical course of action for me a s would be in this regard. My husband also knows about everything - he is absolutely shattered - as she is the apple of his eye, but he also knows that it is such a difficult situation and therefore does not want to act on impulse (which is to beat the shit out of the guy and ground her for life!)

She is turning 18 in April and then she is pretty much entitled to do as she pleases, but we still have the responsibility to protect her and really do not feel comfortable with her hanging out with someone that can potentially put her in dangerous situations in his wheeling and dealings - not to talk about the fact that he can and will introduce her to hard drugs.

They have only been together for a couple of weeks - so I feel that the situation is still salvageable. What do i do? Do i confront them both and take the risk of alienating her. Do i leave the situation and by that knowingly have her enter a world of possible addiction..

I would really appreciate feedback from moms who had to deal with similar situations

Amanda

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