2 TEEN GIRLS.....:.HELP !!!!!!!

Alicia - posted on 09/27/2013 ( 2 moms have responded )

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Ok, here it goes, I have 2 teenage daughters 13 & 15, I have taken their phones away, that was for several different reasons, 1st time they had back-talked w/phone in hand, then it led to other things ie, misuse of the Internet, talking & textin @ night, ( they've not had them for close to 2 years now) & I've also taken their I-pods, computers, & now they basically do nothing. . However 1 of them happens 2 be in SPORTS, so she gets what seems to be more freedom than my other daughter.
They've done chores w/ me since they've been knee-high 2 a grasshopper, & they both get AMAZING GRADES. They are actually great girls and have never been in any kind of trouble.
I hate it that both of them seem 2 not have a social life and they make comments that I do want them 2 have 1.
I keep telling them once they've done their chores w/o being told for a certain period of time, that they will get ALOT of their priveledges back, & more, (not the cell phones) like going places w/ friends, having friends over, having supervised time on the Internet. As a family we've been considering turning our HUGE FAMILY ROOM into a game room for the girls. This way their friends would be able to have a safe place 2 be w/ their buddies and we'd be to rest our minds knowing that our girls and everyone ARE SAFE AND HAPPY.
They want this. However they cannot seem to do their minimal chores for 2 weeks so that we can MOVE ON...... I want my girls to have a life ! PLEASE HELP ME !
AM I BEING TOO HARD ON THEM ???
They are STUBBORN & I use to give in ALOT !




Ok, Steph, I saw that your post is a few years old but I hope you see this and can HELP ME.
Ok, here it goes, I have 2 teenage daughters 13 & 15, I have taken their phones away, that was for several different reasons, 1st time they had back-talked w/phone in hand, then it led to other things ie, misuse of the Internet, talking & textin @ night, ( they've not had them for close to 2 years now) & I've also taken their I-pods, computers, & now they basically do nothing. However 1 if them happens 2 be in SPORTS, so she gets what seems to be more freedom than my other daughter.

They've done chores w/ me since they've been knee-high 2 a grasshopper, & they both get AMAZING GRADES. They are actually great girls and have never been in any kind of trouble.

I hate it that both of them seem 2 not have a social life and they make comments that I do want them 2 have 1.

I keep telling them once they've done their chores w/o being told for a certain period of time, that they will get ALOT of their priveledges back, (not the cell phones) like going places w/ friends, having friends over, having supervised time on the Internet. As a family we've even really been considering turning our HUGE FAMILY ROOM into a game room for the girls. This way their friends would be able to have a safe place 2 be w/ their buddies and we'd be to rest our minds knowing that our girls and everyone ARE SAFE AND HAPPY.

They want this. However they cannot seem to do their minimal chores for 2 weeks so that we can MOVE ON...... I want my girls to have a life !!!!! PLEASE HELP ME !!!!!

AM I BEING TOO HARD ON THEM ???

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♫ Shawnn ♪♫♫ - posted on 09/27/2013

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Well, you outlined it yourself. "They are stubborn and I used to give in a lot".

You are now reaping the results of giving in to them. Stick by your guns, tell them you're all turning over a new leaf, you are no longer going to give in to their every whim, and they are expected to keep up with their responsibilities.

DO NOT GIVE IN AGAIN. They'll either learn to do what is expected, or they'll be miserable, which will be their choice. Make sure they understand that their happiness is a direct result of their choices. Good choices means privileges. Poor choices means no social life.

Now, on another note, I see that you've posted this multiple times. It may help you to consolidate your answers if you delete all but one of these posts.

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Alicia - posted on 09/28/2013

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Shawn LIvely ...........

Thank you, thank you, thank you !!!! I just needed 2 have someone agree
that I wasn't be to hard, & to stick to my guns & DO NOT GIVE IN.

Here's a fewv other questions:
Are they ever gonna give in ? OR: Will they be spending their every spare hour @ home until they turn 18 other than when they are @ school ?

We've been @ this for weeks now, I keep a level head even though @ times it's REEEEEALLY hard.

I'm to the point to where I'm buying them cheap TOILET PAPER, their snacks have been cut waaaaay down, etc, this week I may have to resort 2 taking away their HAIR-SPRAY. That may just be the straw that breaks the camels back......

Please if anyone has any suggestions ........ I am open 2 them.
Even corrective criticism is welcome b/c what works 4 1 child may not work for another ...........

They know I want them 2 be able to have a GOOD CHILDHOOD & have gr8 memories...... Ooooh those boogers know what buttons to push that's for sure !!!!

Thanks 🙏

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