Disrespectful, ungratful, lazy, rude, MEAN daughter, HELP!!!!!!

Christine Elizabeth - posted on 08/05/2015 ( 6 moms have responded )

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M daughter does absolutely Nothing around the house without being told. She is disrespectful to me and then expects me to pick up her boyfriend. She is more respectful to her dad them
n me. She also tells my husband things behind my back and it makes me feel bad. I miss her when she was a wee little one. She has times where she is nice to me and then for no REASON SHE RUDE AND UGLY TO ME AGAIN. She told me she was leaving our house at 18. She doesn't understand you can't just leave at 18. She made me cry last night and then went to bed. I was so upset I had a hard time sleeping. I let her use my laptop, pick up her boyfriend , I fight with my husband because of her. I do not to do. I have an 8 year old that hugs me and says she loves me even though sissy don't. She doesn't lift a hand around the house. We gave her one chore because she wouldn't do anything. We have to tell her everyday to do it over and over again or they won't get done. So very different than when was a kid. Please advice would help, please!!!!!!!!!!

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Rose - posted on 08/07/2015

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I agree with Jill's teen with hugging, kissing and telling her you love her. it is a little hard to do when you are so mad at your daughter for disrespecting you and hurting your feelings but just think that is part of how you are going to make your relationship with your daughter better.
Try taking away the things that she cares more about like a going out with her boyfriend if she goes out with him, stop paying her phone bill ect... She will be very upset at first but just you and your husband tell her why you are taken no away the things that she like. i remember once arguing with my mom one time and she gave me the silent treatment. I felt so bad. That was the worst she could have done to me. After that, I thought about twice before I disrespected my mother again. There is something about silent treatment. Your daughter is expecting for you to keep arguing with her and maybe that makes her feel is ok to argue with you.

♫ Shawnn ♪♫♫ - posted on 08/07/2015

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Well, I hate to tell you this, but 18 years of age is legally and adult, and she can leave the house permanently at that point, if she so chooses. Who are you to say that an adult cannot have freedom of movement? To do so restricts her civil liberties, not to mention can be considered a criminal act...
Apparently, at some point, she decided she did not need to listen to you. For what reason, who knows. Perhaps she feels that you don't listen to her? Like I said, who knows, but the reality of the situation is that if she wants to leave when she turns 18, you can't stop her.

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Norma - posted on 09/06/2015

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Wow this sound like my son he can turns off and turns on especially when he wants to use me, when he doesn't get his way he is awful says he hates me and that I'm the problem . I always show that I still love him and I am concern were his might be in the future he doesn't care about his grades ,he told me that when he 18 he going to move out which I can't stop if that's what he wants, with no money, really it's tough out there these but I. and he will find out the hard way. I'm always on his shoulder for things that I not happy about, he stopped doing football this year and I wanted him involved in sports because that is what keeps teens out of trouble. He likes getting high with his bad choose of friends which I don't don't care for. But what can I do ? Nothing . I bought him a car and I sold it because his lack of respect ,he just likes smoking marihuana. I took a lost of 8 hundred dollars when I sold his car just about few months ago . I am upset of all his choice and the disrespect tours me , I have problems with him so far Fin English F in government, F in math .
God help me

Christine Elizabeth - posted on 09/03/2015

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If she chooses to leave the house at 18 she will leave with everything she came into this house with absolutely nothing 18 is too young to leave when you don't have a job you're not responsible you don't have a driver's license come on if she wants to move out and be a bum on the street I can't do nothing about it but that that would be the wrong decision but would I stop or no because it would take her three days to realize if that that she made a mistake.

Jill - posted on 08/06/2015

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I am a 14 year old writing from my mom's account---
Tell her that you love her. For no reason.
Hug her.
Kiss her.
Tell her how you feel.
Let her tell you how she feels.
Stay strong. It may not be good to hear.
Offer a reward for doing chores. Give her an allowance or a treat if she does them. I know this isn't how you wish it would be but it is.
She probably has hormones... If she is mad, don't interfere.
Try not to punish her the first time. Give her warning. Punishments will make her more mad.
Let your husband be the "bad guy" for once. Have him talk to your daughter about her behavior.
Good luck. Don't be afraid to message me (or my mom) for help.

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