Don't know what to do!

Bonham367 - posted on 04/26/2014 ( 3 moms have responded )

12

0

0

Help! My husband and I fight because he is the good dad and I'm the bad mom! To a point I want move out. We have three kids together been married almost 15 years in October. My daughter is 15 she hates me,we can talk to one another we start yelling, are two sons are 13 and 7 my 13 year old not that bad and my 7 year old well I'm still His mommy . My husband give the kids what they want and don't ask questions. I'm the mom that is like. Do your homework .do your chores. Don't do that. U no better. That's not were it goes. Hell may time I have to ask or tell u.. It's time to come in and eat dinner. Or no I don't have money for that right now. I do everything yes my husband works and pays the bills but I work to. I feel alone I'm sleeping on the couch.

3 Comments

View replies by

Stacy Lee - posted on 04/29/2014

13

0

0

Personally I would take a weeks vacation WITHOUT the family and let them fend for themselves with the exception of the 7 year old. Maybe you can have someone care for him for the week. But the rest are old enough to be on their own. Dad needs to see how important you are along with the kids and all that you do for them. The more you do, the more they won't do for themselves. You are handing everything to them on a platter. Dad doesn't want to be the bad guy because he wants his children to always love and adore him. Problem is, later on in life they are going to not be so happy with dad when they realize that he didn't do his part in disciplining them and raising them to work for their things, to learn how to earn respect, to be disciplined in the most important aspects of life. When they are truly out on their own for example their first job, no one is going to be there to help them or listen to them complain. They will be set up for disaster because they don't listen to authority. That needs to be explained to dear old dad. So while you enjoy a week to relax, that will make them fend for themselves, clean their own clothes, and fail at their own homework. And if you are worried about all the mess that is left, hire a house cleaner the day you come back and give the bill to the husband. Good luck!

Stacey - posted on 04/28/2014

5

0

0

I was in a 23 yr marriage where dad did no discipline and I did it all. My oldest, daughter now 25, realized at 12 that mom know what she is talking about. I was lucky. My son on the other hand never lernes responsibility, or any work ethic because Dad would not allow me to discipline him the way I did my daughter. Kids are individuals and need different approach. Stop trying to get on your daughters good side. Every time she asks you for something send her to dad. He may keep gibing, but there will come a point that he will have to say NO... She will realize that mom is easier to talk to and more rational. You can't leave because of one child. You have a family to think about.

♫ Shawnn ♪♫♫ - posted on 04/28/2014

13,264

21

2015

Family counseling. Get on the same friggin page, for god's sake!



Yeah, there's usually a 'bad cop/good cop' with parenting, but when you're on the same page, bad cop and good cop work together for solutions.



My hubby is good cop to my bad cop, and vice versa. Either way, we're united in how we parent, and have been successfully doing so for 20 years.

Join Circle of Moms

Sign up for Circle of Moms and be a part of this community! Membership is just one click away.

Join Circle of Moms