Help finding friends for teen daughter

Karen - posted on 11/04/2012 ( 4 moms have responded )

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Does anyone have any suggestions? I am heartbroken for my daughter. She is 17 years old and has had 2 really close friends that have both really done her wrong. She is to the point where she doesn't like people because she doesn't trust them and I can't blame her. She has no friends now and I would like to help her get over feeling this way. Does anyone have any suggestions how I can help her meet people her own age. She has anxiety problems as well and attends online school so she isn't around anyone her age to make friends with. Please help, I really don't know what to do. Thank you for your help.

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Caroline - posted on 11/06/2012

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From what I have seen with my teenage son is that making friends based on similar interests is the way to go. Therefore, if she likes dancing, then sign up for some dance classes, etc.



Regarding trust, my son and I just enjoyed a conversation about everyone having life lessons that come at different times. So, sometimes when a friend acts horrible, they are having a life lesson and the best thing to do is to back up and give them their space. We talk alot about humans, especially teenagers being far from perfect as they develop and learn how they fit in with the world. I still cringe at some of my own behavior as a kid! What was I thinking?



I hope your daughter finds some new friends who are going to be more like her! Also, therapy can really help with anxiety! I'm a big supporter of asking the expert for some ideas!

Sarah - posted on 11/06/2012

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I would definitely try to get her involved in some kind of activity if you can. My daughter does Choir and Theater because those are things she enjoys. She has met tons of friends doing these activities and that has made a huge difference for her... So, yeah, see if you can find anything in your area that she would be interested in participating in, and get her in it. It might cost you some money for classes or what not, but it will be worth it if it can help your daughter learn to be a little more social, and if she can meet some folks who share her interests!!

C - posted on 11/05/2012

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I'm sorry for your daughter's experience!!! I have a 14 year old daughter and she is just a loaner, she has a few friends but none that could be considered "close." It has taken me a very long time to accept that she is fine the way she is and that sometimes we cannot fix things for them. If your daughter is interested and you would like to suggest something perhaps check with your local libraries and see if they have a teen book group. Or if she likes art perhaps an art class. If she enjoys sports then perhaps that. I know in my state if your child attends a cyberschool they can participate in all after school activites at the middle school and high school, does she have any interest in sports or clubs? Good Luck!!!

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