help needed for my 17yr old son

Claire - posted on 01/09/2014 ( 14 moms have responded )

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My 17 year old son is driving me insane. Hes out of control hes selfish. Disrespectful argumentive and damn right rude. He constantly wants money and causes arguments between every one please help

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In the same boat, I have a 16 year old who's so disrespectful, dirty, rude and in a bad mood all the time. I've heard people say that these are really tough years for a mother and I pray to god that they are right because this is awful

Thatbinnichick - posted on 01/12/2014

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And aldo if he wsnts money he needs to get a job give him money only when you know what its for if its important if he lies and spends it on somthing stupid dont give him nuthin

Thatbinnichick - posted on 01/12/2014

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What i do to my 20 year
Old is take away her wifi it works take away his keys and when hes rude tell him to man the hell up and recpect his mother

Jodi - posted on 01/10/2014

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I agree 100% with Shawnn. And with regard to the money thing? Tell him to get a damn job. Sorry, but my son has had a job since he was 15. Yes, he only works two shifts a week, but it is enough money that he doesn't have to mooch off me every opportunity he gets, AND he learns a sense of responsibility along with it, together with life skills. It also means he has less time on his hands to be a pain in the butt. No 17 year old should have money just handed to them and neither should they expect it.

♫ Shawnn ♪♫♫ - posted on 01/10/2014

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Because, at some point, you give in, and he knows darn good and well that you do.

Hopefullmom - posted on 01/10/2014

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Clothes left on the floor, he folds and puts away a load of laundry. Backtalks his phone gets taken away (Can't talk to family with respect then you can't talk to others). trash not picked up he vacuums the house, He does the chores but the very next day it's like he has no clue what was done the day before and why....

♫ Shawnn ♪♫♫ - posted on 01/10/2014

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So, you're allowing your 10 yo to dictate to your 17 yo proper behaviour? No wonder the 17 yo is being an ass. No one likes to be disciplined or dictated to by a younger sibling.

If your kid is still acting out, you're still missing something somewhere.

Hopefullmom - posted on 01/10/2014

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Fully understand what you are saying but please believe me I do have consequences and I do hold them accountable. I have established sensible consequences that reflect the behavior My 10 year old tells my 16 year old how to respond with respect and how to avoid having consequences. I am at a lost and ready to give up...

♫ Shawnn ♪♫♫ - posted on 01/10/2014

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Then quit giving him privileges back. Simple enough.

Hopefullmom - posted on 01/10/2014

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I take privileges away....But it just goes right back to being selfish and rude. I have other children that I have never seen this behavior in.

♫ Shawnn ♪♫♫ - posted on 01/10/2014

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Here's the deal. These kids do not just wake up one day and decide to be assholes. They are merely continuing behaviour that has been allowed or not discouraged up until this point.

If you want your kids to be respectful and mindful of their responsibilities, you need to parent them from day one.

If you do not have consequences for their actions now, you need to get some established.

♫ Shawnn ♪♫♫ - posted on 01/09/2014

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And what are his consequences for being rude, disrespectful, and demanding?

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