how can i help my daughter who as been raped

Stephanie - posted on 12/09/2012 ( 5 moms have responded )

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my daughter was raped by 2 of her so called "friends" in august this yr and i dont know how to help her or what signs to look out for as she has self harmed twice since.HELP PLEASE

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Crystal - posted on 12/11/2012

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talk with her, go out to eat just the two of you, and talk, be her bestfriend, but don't get to close, let her know that self harmed will not help! and i could put you in touch with my wife who went trought the same thing!

Margaret - posted on 12/11/2012

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She must get help, as soon as possible. She should not try to work through this on her own.



I am not a psychologist and I won't pretend to fully comprehend what she's been through and what is still happening to her. However it stands to reason that it damaged her and it will take some doing to repair her.



She may have problems trusting anyone at this point and it will take time to for even you, her mother to regain her trust. Not helping will be your own need to comfort her while at the same time wanting to give her space. Try to find a balance there, call it "respect" if you will.



I am, sadly, a close witness to the damage that is done to a young girl by sexual assault. It takes time and sure isn't easy for anyone, not for the girl and not for anyone that loves her.

Stephanie - posted on 12/11/2012

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Thankyou for the advice and she s eventually seeing a therapist and i know itl take time. I worry though coz even though we are close she sits in her room for hours at a time but dont want to seem pushy so give her space. But ths is when she has harmed herself but other than not letting her out of my sight constantly im clueless! Any ideas would be really appreciated.

Shauna - posted on 12/10/2012

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What do you do if your daughter was raped when she was 14yrs old and tells you when she is 23yrs old???

Martha - posted on 12/10/2012

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Most hospitals offer intensive outpatient therapy. In one place she can see a psychiatrist and a therapist. She can receive one on one therapy and group therapy with kids her own age. My son went through one of these programs and I found it to be of great help. It speeds up the process of therapy because they go everyday for maybe 7 or 10 days then they can be put on a regular schedule with a therapist, in a lot of cases you can continue seeing a therapist through the program. Where it may take months to build a relationship with a therapist during weekly visits, this can get your daughter to that point much faster. Self harming is a huge cry for help, she needs all she can get for what she went through. Good luck, I wish you both the best.

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