How do you deal with two teenage boys about sex?

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Lisa - posted on 07/17/2009

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I have to agree with most here. Be honest with your sons. Not just with boys but with the girls too. Now days you HAVE to know everything thats out there when it comes to sex. My son didnt know what a condom ws, I told him and he just couldnt grasp the idea of it, so I got one and showed him., I pulled it out of the package and let him SEE what they was. I let him feel of it to let him know what they really was. He now understands. We still have our talks. I dont believe in giving all the info to them at once. Let it sink in a little at a time. That way he has time to think about what we have talked about and can come to me with questions. We cant just worry about our boys getting girls pregnant now days.When I was a teenager, that was one of the biggest fears. Now sex can kill ya and my 13 yr old son knows that now. Just my 2 cents.

Mona - posted on 07/14/2009

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Darce,
I just wrote a blog about this. I have 2 teen boys (14 & 17). I talked to them at two different times/ages. I just laid it on the line. I figure their friends wouldn't be holding anything back when sharing their view so I had to do the same. I wanted them to have all the information. Yes, it was uncomfortable for everyone but I'd rather have that than.....well you know.
You should also watch 16 and Pregnant on MTV. It's great birth control.

http://moremilestones.blogspot.com

Päivi - posted on 07/10/2009

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I have been talking about sexuality with my sons since they were toddlers :-). Everytime they have asked something they got a honest answer, if I´ve known it. I have also given them condoms before they needed them, so they coulg practice to put them on. The first "action" is far too excited to deal with condorms first time. Boys are now 17 and 14. Every now and then we do talk about sex. One important thing is, don´t force you boys to talk and do not tell about you adulthood-sexlife.

Take care and good luck.

Sara - posted on 07/09/2009

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Darce,
I agree with what everyone has said. I was up front and honest with my older two boys and will be with my youngest too. I told them that I really hope that they will wait for the "right one" but I know that it will be hard to do. I also told them not to rely on the girl to provide protection and even if she says she has birth control ALWAYS use a condom. After I found out that they were sexually active, we talked again and made sure everyone was being safe and offered to buy or give money for the condoms. It was the hardest thing I have ever done.

Geraldine - posted on 07/07/2009

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Darce,
The best way to deal with them is to be open & honest with them . Ask them what they know so far and give them the feedback that they will need to make positive choices in their lives . Tell them that they must be mindful & respectful of their female counterparts as to their feeling about this subject & definitely not jump into situations without fully evaluating the situation from all angles.Reaching out to their family doctor for age approriate resources that they can read at their leisure is helpful too.

Cathy - posted on 07/05/2009

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We've been very open and honest with our boys all along but when those teenage years hit, we would have conversations quite often about "treating a female like a lady" and "respect women". We've had very frank discussions about sex, protection, STD's, pregnancy, all of it. Just know that teenagers are going to partake but hopefully they will be discreet and safe and know they can talk to you about anything.

[deleted account]

I agree with Shelley. Be honest. Share your own emotions at that age (no, don't tell them WHAT you did just how you felt) It helps put it all into context for them. Answer their questions with as much detail as you feel comfortable with. For our 16 yr old, it has been the combination of honesty and putting his life into perspective - within the context of history and experiences of others in the family. It helps them feel like they belong to the family as well - it is an identity and gives them a bank of experiences to pull on when they need it. Sex knowledge is not only about the nuts and bolts. The emotions and responsibilities that come along with it are as important, if not more so... and love them. Your teen boys need the occasional wink, smile and cuddle now so much more than they did when they weer but they won't ask for it.
xx

Shelly - posted on 07/03/2009

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Darce,

Be honest with them....Thats the best way to go about it teach them to respect the girls they are dating...If thier father is still in thier lives then have him talk to them or if not find a strong male role modle that can talk to them...What ever you do be honest with them...Good luck and let us know how it goes.

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