How often does your 14 yr old hang out with friends?

Pam - posted on 06/04/2011 ( 5 moms have responded )




My daughter has been hanging out with friends and has a curfew. She follows curfew, is an excellent girl and I have no reason not to trust her. The thing is her friends keep texting her to go out, they seem to go out every night and ask my daughter to come too. Its hard for her to understand that since her peers are aloud to go out that I maintain "not every night". Is there really anything wrong with her going out as long as she is keeping her curfew and behaving?


Jodie - posted on 06/10/2011




I have a fourteen yr old girl and she is also a good girl, because of this she does have a lot of trust from us.In saying this she does try to stretch the boundries every now and then, call me old fashioned,but in our house through the week is for heads, study, school, jobs there is also plenty of time for phone calls and facebook, i dont mind if a friend wants to come over for an hour or so after school, but thats IT ! She goes out most weekends to friends places or friends sleep over.. one weekend a month is family time , fishing, family gatherings, camping ect.Even though i trust our girl there are many young girls out there in the world who unfortunately can teach ours bad habits, and i have learned this the hard way with our eldest girl.The thing with teens is to really consider the rules and boundreies before agreeing to their once we say yes or go along with certain behaviour it becomes really hard to say no or change our minds later.i say keep them around for as long as you can till you can really feel the need to give another small inch at a time :)

♫ Shawnn ♪♫♫ - posted on 06/09/2011




I'm in with the other moms. At 14, how much "hanging out" are they doing? Is it a potential situation where they could eventually be enticed to do something stupid?

We've been the "kid house" since before we even had kids! Most were kids of our friends, who'd been raised around us, so it was natural to come hang out at our house. And, they did little odd jobs for me in return for the privilege. As my kids were born, and have grown, we're still the kid house. On any given day, we have an age range from 6-18. (ours are 13 & 17). I don't mind that they hang at my place, I'd much rather be the neighborhood mom than think they may be elsewhere getting into mischief!

Constance - posted on 06/05/2011




I agree with Jaime. My house is like the community center I have 7 kids that range from 19 to 6. They all have tons of friends and they are alway here. As far as not letting her go every single time she may not like it but she is 14 she still needs limits. That was my problm no limits. I had a curfew I followed the rules but when I wasn't home, you really don't want to know everything I was doing.

I am not saying she is going to misbehave but limits remind her you are watching.

Jamie - posted on 06/05/2011




How about hanging out at your house? Do the friends come and veg?Do you talk to the other parents, where the kids are hanging out at? I bet the mom would like to have another parent, willing to have the gang over, make your place the meeting spot every once and a while.

We had a revolving door at times the family room downstairs was like a hurricane hit it...but my kids and their friends were safe, and it gave me a chance to get to know the kids` friends. There were times my kids weren't even home and the friends were vegging in our basement playing xbox, ps,guitar hero, or outside on the trampoline,in the pool, skateboarding on our driveway etc.


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Louise - posted on 06/09/2011




If she is sticking to her curfew then you are very lucky and should allow her some freedom but just explain to her now that she will soon have a heavy work load from school which will have to come first. There is nothing wrong with letting her go every night as long as homework is done. Lets face it every night turns into once a week during the winter months when it is cold. let her have fun whilst she can she sounds like a good girl so reward her.

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