How to make my son do his work at school??

Jessica_lynne_0618 - posted on 09/02/2014 ( 3 moms have responded )

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My son will soon me 13 we have had this problem every year but I am at my wits end! It is the second week of school and i already got a call from the teacher informing me that my son is not getting his work done. i have bribed him, I have punished him, I have done everything! Does anyone have any advice for me please. I can't take this anymore it is ridiculous and it's not the fact that he can't do the work he can he is just lazy!

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Chet - posted on 09/04/2014

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I just want to add that middle school is very difficult because a lot of the fun stuff from the lower grades is gone, but you're still so far from graduating it's hard to see that school really matters. The middle school years tend to be a low point for academics, and a high point for things like peer orientation.

I would rather not try to scare a kid straight. Fear is not an ideal motivator. A lot of homeless people are homeless due to mental illness, not lack of education. It's true that a lot of inmates in the US prison have very little education, but generally, there were factors beyond the control of those that caused them to do poorly in school. They weren't given what they needed to succeed.

What you need is for your son to WANT to learn.

I agree with Ronnierae about having your son's academic level assessed, and confirming that he does not have any type of learning disability. If he isn't behind, or if he has some sort of learning difference, he is going to need support to get him to a point where he can do well.

If your son is just not inspired by this school I would look around for different schools. Maybe some type of alternative program would be more engaging for him.

Jessica_lynne_0618 - posted on 09/02/2014

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Thank you I am going to try it, we have mentioned to him before that you have to do good in school to have a good life later on. He does this every year and every year I think he will grow up.But he is old enough now to think about his future and I will try that!

Ronnierae - posted on 09/02/2014

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first thing I suggest is to talk to him, not accusingly, and ask him why? the second thing. give some real time examples he can see on his own, on the result of not doing, either required tasks, or work, ie..getting fired from work, not being able to afford food to eat, not being able to go to college, being considered dumb by his peers. I do have some first hand experience in this, and found that the reality of not doing assigned tasks, can take it's toll later in life. another example might be to take him to science fair, and point out the fact that not everyone participated, and what their future might be, and the future of those that did. Talk to your local police guy or woman, ask them where the bums and hobos are at, Take a drive past them, pointing out that you wonder what their education was, or lazy they were in school, may even mention drugs and alcohol. the reward system sometimes works, but it didn't with me, and I hate blackmail. reality did work, that's why I suggest it. but you got to talk to him, understand where his head is at. he will never come clean, if your berating him, or yelling at him. in his head you just don't understand. have you had his reading skills tested, or his comprehension level, or eyes as in dyslexic(letters backwards, numbers out of order). that's where I found my problem.

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