i need advice on my 16yr old daughter,weve had a bad arguement,which is out of character for her and i,we had a great mum/daughter relationship.it started with her laughing at me about my laugh and it esculated,she said im a bully,spend money on her to buy her love,im jealous of her and her dads relationship,she left to go to a friends yesterday without telling me,but im the heated arguement i said i wish id never of had you.which is completely untrue,now she wants nothink to do with me,my husband is no help.we are moving in a few weeks[no far away]she also says i always moan about money.what hurts me is she called me a bully?what do i do,how do i mend these bridges and hopefully get back to how we were?please help at my wits end :p

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Mary - posted on 10/22/2011

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Sounds like she is upset about the move? The best way to get through to her is have another parent speak to her! Can you find one of her friends parents that she admires to find out how she is feeling about this! On the down side this may be the start of a long time of her being angry with you! Many Teens go through this period! Honestly it is sort of a way to cut the apron strings... If Everything is good she will never move out...... Let her know how much you love her! Write her a letter to tell her so! Ask her to write you back! Remember that things always work out in the end! Sometimes we get all caught up in the moment. Take the time while she is at her friends to take a hot bath...get your hair done. Let her see you are spending some of your own money on you instead of her. The next time she asks you for something cut a picture of it out and give it to her with a note that says I love you so much I wish I could get you this! Trust me she will get over this! YOU will TOO!

Louise - posted on 10/22/2011

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Let her calm down for a few hours and then ring her and ask her to come home and talk calmly. She may have the ump for a few days or so, so be prepared for that. You have both said things you don't mean but as you are the parent here you need to make the first step to reconcile. If she refuses to talk to you then write her a letter and post it where she is staying. She will read it. Then let her come to you. You have done all you can. These things happen, what you have to do now is allow her space to lick her wounds and calm down. She knows you love her and that this was just an arguement that got out of hand. Give her time.

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