I need help

Lourdes - posted on 10/15/2014 ( 8 moms have responded )

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I need help . My daughter just told me that she have feelings for girls , what can I do I'm so scare ,and I dont know what to do

8 Comments

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Sarah - posted on 12/12/2014

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Easy there don't freak out she is probably just looking for attention from you or her dad or kids at school. Don't make it a big deal. Just tell her " Sounds good and I will support you no matter what". Then just drop it and talk about other things. Every time she brings up that she is gay always respond with the sounds good statement

[deleted account]

Your daughter has confided in you. It's not easy "coming out" to someone, especially your mother.

She has confided in you because you are her mum. She loves you, and you love her. She knows that you will always love her, and that you will always be there for her.

It takes a while to adjust to the fact that someone is not hetereosexual, especially with the heavy discrimination that comes with being a teenager. But not just a teenager, it effects everyone differently.

Sexuality is not a choice in life. You should support her the best you can, if you don't feel that you can have a discussion with her. If she can openly admit this to you, you should be able to have a conversation and respond appropriately and explain yourself. She will be looking for acceptance, it's an important step in coming out. You can simply explain that you love her, but you would like some time to adjust to this idea however you do not love her any less. If you don't feel you can adjust, you should explain to her that you will need more time and you do not know how long it will take. Explain that you told someone you and her are both close to know or know well, such as a best friend and that they will be there for her. If that person is happy to.

There are plenty of LGBTQ communities and support centres that can not only assist your daughter, but also you. If you're confused on this situation, I wouldn't begin googling sexualities, the Internet is an opinionated place. I'd suggest to talk to your local GP and gain knowledge on sexuality from a professional view.

It also depends on her age, for now she may like females but throughout puberty hormones continually change. They also get confused, however this does not mean she is confused. She may change her mind on her sexuality, depending on the reaction she receives.

Tessa - posted on 12/03/2014

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Your daughter is probably just as terrified as you are. It probably took a lot of courage for her to come out to you. She is still the exact same person. The best thing to do is to be supportive.

Barbj - posted on 10/31/2014

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I think as parents, we all have these dreams of what our children will be. I dream that my own daughter will be a nurse or a counselor, get married fairly young to a man who will spend his life being crazy about her. It's hard to imagine your child living a life so different than the one we imagined they'd have. Your daughter is young, and brave for telling you how she feels. You must be a great mom for her to be able to share with you how she feels. Is your daughter kind, sweet, respectful? Those are what truly matter in life, not who she chooses to share it with. Just support her, she may need you now more than ever.

Maria - posted on 10/30/2014

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It's important you let her understand you accept her unconditionally. It's something concerning her personality in the deep, very very important issue for her. Give her tranquility as much as you can.

Raye - posted on 10/20/2014

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If your daughter is attracted to girls, there's nothing you can do to change her. If you try, you will just humiliate her and make her hate you. Accept her and be supportive of her, but you also need to be a responsible parent. You want to make sure that your daughter is spending time with people that will treat her well, no matter what gender those people are.

♫ Shawnn ♪♫♫ - posted on 10/17/2014

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2015

Accept that your daughter feels differently than you do and move on. If you can't support her, keep your mouth shut, and let her be herself.

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