Kids and Homework...

Carolyn Beth - posted on 05/14/2013 ( 7 moms have responded )

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Please Help is all I can say. I moved about 8 months ago from a small town and the schools are better here but here is the issue I am facing. My kids are all smart and they are lazy as all get out. this is the 3rd time in 8 months that I have had to get them all caught up on school work. My daughter I am scared will have to repeat the 5th grade because she is missing 17 assignments. My son who is in the 6th grade is missing 14. All the time.. "no mom, no home work" and here we are yet again. This is the 3rd go round of no toys, Tv, video games, all home work , and chores but still they don't care. How do you handle this?

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Nightingale - posted on 05/14/2013

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Yea,that was me growing up..
mom- homework?
me- uhh, no?
mom-are you sure?
me- yep.

Thanks to me being like that..and my mom being a push over.. I was a bit wiser with how I handled my own kids.. I dont ask them if they have homework.. I tell them I got a call from the school and they have to have all assingments done by tonight or its summer school.. so grounded until further notice or I see their completed work and YES I know what they have left to do!

Amazing..they believe me. And I check every night their assignment books and if I feel something isnt kosher, I call the teachers or email them.

Both of mine are really smart as well, but when both hit 5th grade, they felt homework was a waist of time. I home school now.. so much easier sticking them with their interests rather than learning all the pointless bs schools teach today. ANd I know when they have assignments due!

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My 13 year old daughter is in 7th grade and I ask her everyday if she has homework and everyday I receive the same response "no". Well she brought home 2 Ds on her last report card in English and Science. When I go on the parent website I see that she is getting straight As on all her tests and classwork, however most of her homework is listed as incomplete or missing. When I ask her about missing assignments she will flat out lie and tell me she just turned them in that day and the website hasn't been updated yet.

We made her sit down and complete her missing English assignment which immediately brought her grade up to a B. Unfortunately she claimed that she lost her Science package and would have to look for it in the classroom (it has still not been completed and that was a month ago). We took all electronics away for 2 weeks thinking that would be incentive to bring up her Science grade. No effect! She now has a second assignment missing and is one point away from an F.

Our new incentive will be to ground her until the parent website shows that she has turned in all late assignments and raised her grade to at least C which is sooo frustrating since she is capable of an A. Hope this works, but I would appreciate any advice.

Christie - posted on 05/23/2013

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My 21 yr old son graduated three years ago and it was a miracle. He didn't do his homework from the second grade until he was a senior. And he lied to me the whole time about what he was supposed to be doing.

Yes, I was the Pushover Mom like Nightingale's mom, but I also spent two years doing what Laura Buchanan talks about. The teachers emailed me the assignments and I checked that he was doing them for those two years. Then my husband lost his job and I ended up working many hours of overtime and I dropped the ball. My husband wasn't much help--he would spend his time being upset about my son's grades but he wouldn't put the effort into helping. That was "my" job.

Sorry to get into the griping thing. What I'm trying to say is that I posted to this message board when my son was a freshman and multiple Moms on here told me that things would turn out okay. The phenomenon of intelligent children, especially boys, doing poorly in elementary/middle/high school and then going on to succeed in college and/or careers is fairly common.

The one thing that you, Ms. Diel, must never do is complete your children's homework. Compared to the workplace where a person gets fired and loses his income for poor job performance, the school's "worst" punishment is making a person repeat a grade level. In fifteen years, are you going to travel from one of your children's house to another to another just to do their work for them? It's better that they learn there are consequences for their behavior NOW than wait for the big bad world to teach them. Because that will be a nasty lesson.

Hang in there and stay strong. Don't do their work for them and have faith that they'll start doing it for themselves eventually. *hugs*

User - posted on 05/21/2013

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Wow, your kids sound like my 5th grader! She has a lot more going on than yours, or atleast it sounds that way, b/c my daughter has anxiety and is a homebound student. But you know what, my daughter is so string willed that even as far back as 2 nd grade, I can remember her not caring about her homework. It drove me crazy!! Now we are on quite the journey, but she still hates homework and I have to take her privileges away too. Even then, she just doesn't put the effort forth and I too end up doing it for her! Best of Luck!!

Laura - posted on 05/21/2013

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Get a planner and have the teacher put their assignments into it, have her email you their assignments. AT the end of the day, she can let you know if they turned them in. I had to do this with two of my boys.. Talk with the teacher and see what is more convienent for her so she will be willing to help. Get the kids and IEP and then the teacher will have to do something to keep you informed.

Lulu - posted on 05/16/2013

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So I have four daughters one is still 4 and hasn't started school yet and my oldest is 13 in 7th grade. The two oldest ones (the 13 year old and a 12 year old) are doing ok in school and have no missing assignments. The 6 year old is having a lot of trouble in 1st grade. She doesn't want to do her homework and wants to play in her iPad all day. I do take away her iPad but she doesn't seem to care. She wants to watch tv, so I take out the card. She is smart but doesn't want to learn. In where I live, kids can't get held back until high school. So I will put her in summer school and maybe a reading/math camp for first graders. My oldest daughters do their homework and get good grades because I threatened them that if they do bad in school, they will end up in summer school and they really don't want to go to summer school. Tell that to your kids. Also in both my oldest daughter's schools, there is a homework class after school. They can do their homework there and get all the help they need. Also my oldest daughter said that in her class, her teacher lets the kids come before and after school if they need help or have to catch up with assignements. Have a talk with both their teachers to see what you can do. I hope this helped and I hope your kids improve in school.

Jodi - posted on 05/15/2013

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I am concerned that it is only now that you are aware that all of these assignments are missing. Did the school not discuss this with you sooner? I teach high school (Years 7-10) and we call parents when an assignment isn't submitted.

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