My 13 year old daughter is overweight.

Christabel - posted on 01/17/2014 ( 5 moms have responded )

44

3

2

She has always had problems with controlling her weigh, even as a toddler. Both her father and myself are healthy weight. Her younger sister is as skinny as a rake. But my sisters always issues with excess weight. Now I would like to suggest that we need to do something more proactive rather than just encourage her to eat healthily. Physically she is not an active child and I think she also eats because she is bored. How should I approach this?

MOST HELPFUL POSTS

Chet - posted on 01/20/2014

2,093

0

587

She's 13. You can't do this for her. You can support her, and you can do things that will make things easier, but the driving force for change needs to come from her.

How sensitive is she about her weight? Is she open to you suggesting physical activities? Are there things she won't try because she is self conscious about her size?

If she eats when she is bored can you help her to stay busy and occupied?

I would really try to pitch this as you making yourself available to help, throwing out ideas of what might be possible, but not actually telling her what to do.

Teresa - posted on 01/21/2014

24

0

5

I am referring to menstrual cycles. My daughter had some and then just stopped altogether. When she did have them, they were very irregular. I told Dr and he said if they didn't straighten out to come back to see him. When we went back, that is when they tested. Yes it is rare but apparently we have a family history of thyroid problems on my husband side. The pediatric endocrinologist did the test for ( which is different from normal thyroid) and did not expect it to be that but found out she had and was severe.
Some symptoms she had were tiredness ( not as active as before), trouble sleeping (always staying up or having trouble going back to sleep), cold (went camping and everyone finally got warm but not her) and dry skin
Hopes this helps.

Teresa - posted on 01/20/2014

24

0

5

First of all, since the rest of the family is of a healthy size and the sister is really skinny... have her go see a doctor and have simple thyroid tests ran. Just because someone like the younger sister is skinny doesn't mean there isn't a problem.
Also a doc can tell your daughter what is a healthy weight and it not be just a comparison with the younger sibling.
We had this happen in our house, my daughter at 13 was have problem with weight not huge just chunky. She started having cycle problems and when I took her to the dr for why her cycles were messing up, he did a work up on her thyroid. It was slightly off so he sent her to an specialist who tested her and she was dangerously low thyroid and had hoshimotos disease. It is rare in kids but she had. The dr said she could have starved and worked out everyday and would still gain weight. A daily thyroid pill ( 4.00 a month) and she now has lost over 40 lbs and is at college studying Health and Fitness. When she told her college professor about it, she also had the same issue, So just don't assume anything until the tests are done. Simple tests. Also the dr can tell her what to do and not hurt the parent child relationship. Whatever you do- don't cause self esteem issues or compare to the skinny child. Better to be a little overweight and love yourself than have a low self esteem. Buy only healthy foods, plan family events that include exercise, get a dog that has to be walked, but really see a dr first.

5 Comments

View replies by

♫ Shawnn ♪♫♫ - posted on 01/22/2014

13,264

21

2015

You should have started healthier habits at a younger age. SHE did not "control" her weight as a toddler, you say, but in reality, YOU did not monitor to see that she munched more.

That being said, a healthy lifestyle for the entire family is a good step. Singling out your 13 yo for "not controlling" her weight is not ok.

I agree with the poster that suggested a full physical as well.

So, whole family starts a healthier lifestyle, including eating right and outdoor activity. Daughter gets a physical, complete with bloodwork to make sure a medical problem is not underlying cause.

Good luck

Christabel - posted on 01/21/2014

44

3

2

It is interesting that you mention Hashimoto's since both myself and my sister have this but I didn't think children could get it. I did have her and her sister tested for coeliacs since my sister has this and I was worried that the skinny one might have it!!! (The things we do). Neither have coeliacs.
What are the other symptoms for Hashimoto's in children?
Are you referring to menstral cycles? My daughter has irregular periods but she has only just had her periods for a year. I was under the understanding that the cycle didn't settle down that quickly.

Join Circle of Moms

Sign up for Circle of Moms and be a part of this community! Membership is just one click away.

Join Circle of Moms