my 16 year old who has been going back and forth with my ex and me, is now staying with his father,his father was mentally abusive, and i feel like my son does not respect me and hurts my feelins, hangs the phone up on me, does not want to talk to me, what do i do?

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Christine - posted on 08/06/2012

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Its so hard to give advice, fear you may say the wrong thing, but know this, you do not deserve to be treated this way, you must first know your worth and represent it as such.......teen age boys tend to subconsciously divert from their moms because they are starting to grow into "man hood" and that is confusing for them, however this does not give them the green light to disrespect their mothers, I have two boys myself, one 18 and other 15. The 18 yr old would have his moments, and still does, but I noticed if I quit calling him, he would not go more than a week without calling me, so I guess what im trying to say is know your role and be confident in your decision, and that he will eventually learn that you are an important role in his life, lets face it, they do spread their wings and fly the nest, just hang in there, i know it is hard and heart breaking, just remind him when you can that you will always be there for him and you understand that being a teen in a tough spot is hard in itself and if he wants to talk you are there, dont be surprised if he doesnt talk, thats normal. I hope this helps. Again, just remember you will always be the first women in his life that has always been there, practicing dysfunction on our own family is the best place to do it because its the most comfortable,,,,,

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Naz - posted on 08/07/2012

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I am going through the same with my twins(seventeen years old) ,one stops talking to me and is becoming very violent towards me since his twin sister moves out to live at her dad's.Now every time i call my daughter she said "mom I liked someone and dad is supporting me and I don't care if you disown me for my mind is made up"She is only seventeen and just graduated and is starting college next year. I don't know whether she is teasing or just want to piss me off but since she is living at her dad's and his wife apartment she is a completely change person. Her dad is a Muslim and is extremely religious and thinks is strongly encouraging to marry a boy 17 yr old ,no job ,no good lifestyle and 20 of them live in the same apartment for his dad marry two times( Samallia from Africa )I am extremely depress over this matter and really needs help since she hardly talks to me and whenever I text her she only reply with ok.She is a very pretty Pakistani /east Indian and her dad brainwashed her to the point where she believe it doesnt matter what and how someone is ,including low life once they are Muslim that's all.I need some suppport

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