My daughter is 19 and disrespectful, always wants to control me

Desiree - posted on 12/20/2015 ( 1 mom has responded )




My daughter is 19,living on her own,pregnant,has now dropped out of pre med school. Which i told her was not an option for her. We used to be best friends, and a great mother daughter relationship. Now all she does is analyze and interrogate me on everything that I do and say its like she has to have complete control over me monitoring me 24/7 and disagrees with anything that I say to her she is completely disrespectful rude and refuses at all to take responsibility for her actions.She is ruining our relationship. I need help!how can i talk with her without flipping out,losing control and solving the problem. Really if she wouldn't be so disrespectful and rude we would have no problems at all. It seems she has a controlling problem, she wants to know everything I'm doing and lets me know if she approves or not, i do not let her get away with any of this behavior. This is why we are yelling and fighting all the time now. I told her i was very close to being completely done with her,and i get the i am sorry but 15 mins later were it's right back to where we started...


Raye - posted on 12/21/2015




Well, she is an adult, so the relationship will never be what it was. She can make decisions for herself, and you can't control what she chooses to do. Neither can she control you. So you're at an impasse. You need to lay out boundaries, and you each need to show some respect as one adult to another, or you leave each other alone. Is it sad if you can't have a close relationship with her? Sure. But sometimes kids need to learn some things on their own, then come back around to realizing that maybe mom wasn't so bad after all.

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