My son trying to be a girl/baby

Kaitlyn - posted on 10/15/2012 ( 22 moms have responded )

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I found out that my son is cross dressing as a girl and not only that but I caught him also pratending to be a baby in his sisters outfit. He had a diaper on and was even drinking a bottle and watching a disney princes movie he is 17 what should a mom do?? He said he was always thinking about being a baby/girl for a long time and all the time. He has been going back to wearing diapers and drinking a bottle and will crawl and talks like a baby. I admit at times it can seem a little curte but other times upsetting. Do any moms think I should just make him come home to his room as a nursery and have his own little toy box? Idk what to do he got really upset and started crying when I told him I didnt like his new adult baby fetish

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Kaitlyn - posted on 11/13/2012

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If I let my son be a baby/girl how do I suport him? And if you know sombody else that does this how do you feel about it? Do you want to give me ideas for his room?

Heather - posted on 10/22/2012

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It sounds to me like the cross-dressing and the baby fetish are two different things. Your son may feel he was born in the wrong body. I would ask him about his sexual preferences. He may be attracted to guys if he feels he was born in the wrong body. If this is true then he might consider himself a straight girl trapped in a guys body. If this is how he feels then he needs your support, not your judgement. If he wants to dress like a girl, let him! Set up limits if you feel they are needed. But talk to him about what he wants and what you feel comfortable with.



As for the baby fetish you need to talk to him about an appropriate time and place for his fetish. You need to set up rules for when and where it is appropriate according to you and your family. Many people have an adult baby fetish. Its not something that's wrong, every person is different. If you feel he should be allowed to change his room and it's what he wants, then go for it.



I would ask him if he would like to see a professional. Not because how he feels is wrong but because some people don't understand and can be quite judgmental. If you are judgmental to him you might push him away and then he will just hide what he is doing, and hiding who he is not healthy. If you want to talk feel free to send me a private message.



Just so you know how I know about this, I live with a person who has an adult baby fetish and I also have friends who cross-dress.

James - posted on 12/22/2014

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Dear Kaitlyn,

Firstly. I'd like to congratulate you on achieving a very sophisticated level of communication with your son. You caught him in a very vulnerable position and it seems that it has brought the two of you closer together. More importantly, you haven't shamed him! He's accepted himself this way so easily because he feels accepted by you.

Pat yourself on the back. You deserve it. Kaitlyn, you see the benefits of this relationship, but don't neglect the complications as those will be your greatest triumph.

You are very lucky Kaitlyn. You chose an extraordinary life path. You are traveling on unpaved roads. Lewis & Clarke! Hernando Desoto! Christopher Columbus! All would be proud.

So what? Your son likes dresses and diapers. What do these things have in common?

1. They are legal - be happy you're not the mother that never hears from her son because he has too many issues that she would not "approve of"

2. They are fabrics

Women wear dresses all the time, and when she picks the right dress it's usually because it "feels" right. So your son likes the way it makes him feel, rock on.

Maybe the two of you can learn how to make clothes and start a business. the possibilities are endless.

It's important to keep the communication open and make sure everyone knows what to expect. Finances, chores, etc.

Feel empowered, you've got guts and compassion. There's not much that can stop you with those two utilities.


A great place to find out more about "littles" and ABDL/TBDL is a micro blogging site called tumblr. Some of the blogs are NSFW so be aware, but there are plenty more that are SFW.

Here is one http://littlespacethings.tumblr.com/post...

It may seem overwhelming at first, but it's a great place for creative self expression. I wouldn't be surprised if your son was on there herself.


One more thing, Kaitlyn, I think there would be a ton of people interested in hearing how your story develops. Blog about it ! I will be your first follower if you do :-)


Good luck with everything...you have an amazing path ahead of you...

Sincerely,

James

lekasjames@gmail.com

L R - posted on 10/16/2012

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Kaitlyn, I do hope that this is a joke and that this is all nonsense. I cannot believe that a mom of a 17 year old would allow their 17 year old to get away with this! It sounds like your son is in dire need of help and you need counseling. I understand that he is confused and wants to be a cross dresser... however, you finding it "cute" to want to be a toddler??? That is going way too far. You both need counseling and you need to do it fast. He is crying out for help and you truly wanting to redo his room and allow him to wear diapers is just mind blowing! For his sake, seek help.

Vanessa - posted on 01/20/2015

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I'm sorry if what I say offends anyone, but what exactly constitutes what is normal for a teen? In my opinion, there is no such thing as a normal teen. There may be typical teens out there, but every teen is unique in their own way.
And there are some more unique than others. There are some teens that even feel more like the opposite sex than others. Some teens even like to dress as the opposite sex. Does this mean the teen is homosexual? Chances are; not likely. Although, I suggest that you ask your son before following what I just said. Each person is different, and even though crossdressing and sexual orientation are not related, he could be. Also, he might identify himself completely as female, and maybe not. Again, talk with your son about it. It's important that you understand your teen's situation before taking action. If he believes himself to be female, or if he's gay, or both, and you attempt to change him by therapy, chances are you will not only fail to fix the problem, but also could cause depression in your son, as well as thoughts of suicide.
As for the baby part; as weird as it may sound, this is actually a lot more common than you know. In truth, any teen might like to wear diapers. Even the most unlikely teen might be into it, so to say it is not typical behavior is a bold statement on it's own. Will a teen normally be open about it? Definitely not. The reason is very simple. They are afraid of ridicule. Also, it isn't always for sexual reasons that a teen would put on a diaper. He may get some sexual pleasure from the diaper, but that alone doesn't really answer why a teen would think to put on a diaper to begin with. It could be that a teen would wear a diaper because it reminds them of when they were little, when things were simpler. Yes, teens get stressed out, too. However, you may be wondering why a teenage boy, age 17, would want to dress and act as a baby girl. Well, there isn't really any knowing unless you find out. There could be a variety of reasons. But should he be punished for wanting to be a baby girl? That is the question I hear around me, but the question that should be asked is this; if this is who he is, should he be punished for expressing himself? If you need to, seek a professional to evaluate your son. Someone that specializes in this field. Your son may not even know who he, or she, is, and a professional can help you and your son better understand. Overall, whatever you choose to do, I hope it is in the best interest of your son; however the coin falls. I hope for the best.

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James - posted on 12/22/2014

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Dear Kaitlyn,

I would first like to commend you on establishing a very sophisticated level of communication with your son. For him, at 17, to be comfortable enough to tell you these things is fantastic! It means that he doesn't feel judged by you. That's pretty impressive considering how embarrassed he must have felt when you initially found out.

So what? He likes dresses and diapers. What do these things have in common, I'd first like to point out that they are LEGAL and made of fabric. Does he like soft blankets too? Your son likes the texture of comforting fabrics...don't we all? Perhaps he is taking it further because he has a very vivid imagination. He could be very talented if put in the proper position who knows?

I think it's important to make him understand things like finances. When will he have to start paying rent? What are some responsibilities he will have under your roof?

I think letting him wear the clothes, etc all the time is no big deal, but he can't "act" like a baby all the time, at least that's how I see it, I'm sure there are a plenty of people who disagree.

More importantly, you should consider yourself a pioneer! You're a mother walking the path less chose. Lewis & Clarke! Hernando Desoto! Christopher Columbus! These are explorers, and by the looks of it, you have a little explorer running through your blood line. I have no doubt that his explorer side comes from you.

Your mind is opened. You see the benefits, but don't neglect the complications as they will be your greatest triumphs.

I'm not sure that babying him, SO he never moves out is a good idea. If you do it, do it because you want to, but you should encourage him to move out. If you both decide you are happier to live together then all the more power to you.

The world is a scary place, and if you can find happiness is something simple you are blessed.

There are so many different types of people in this world. As long as they are not hurting anyone, why should we cast them out? Why do we shun them? Fear. Decisions based on fear are damned. We are all god's children, and he loves us all.

Kaitlyn,

I think your story is very unique and there are lots of people who would be interested on knowing what your life will be like on a day to day basis. You can learn a lot about other people that share the same interests as your son on Tumblr. It's a micro-blogging site that allows users to express themselves creatively to individuals of all sorts.

If you are interested, this is a nice place to start...
http://littlespacethings.tumblr.com/post...


If you do decide to begin blogging about your experiences, I would love to follow your story :-)

Good luck and I hope this was helpful.

Sincerely,

James

lekasjames@gmail.com

James - posted on 12/22/2014

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Dear Kaitlyn,


First off I would like to commend you for establishing a warm and welcoming relationship with your son. From my perspective, if he is telling you that he wants to dress up like this all the time, it means he doesn't feel you are ashamed of him. Therefore, he is comfortable acting that way around you. What is his social life like outside of his fetish? Does he have friends? If not that's ok, not everyone is meant for a cookie cutter lifestyle.

Some people are misanthropes. Some people are popular and have all the right answers. Some people want nothing and do nothing and are free. Some girls secretly go to bed wearing football pads. Some girls...wear pads all the time! We don't criticize them for wearing pads because it's all "part of the plan." We are all god's children and he loves us all.

What is a dress? A piece of delicate fabric, and many women will tell you when they like a dress...if FEELS right. What is a diaper? It originates from a term for a cloth. In fact it is cloth. ON a broader level, I'd say it's safe to say your son loves fabrics. Does he? Ask. Maybe the two of you can a DIY project together that indulges his fetish and teaches him a skill. The internet is BOOMING right now with online specialty clothing stores that entertain the minds similar to your sons, and there are girls out there doing the same thing!

A great place to start to learning to understand him better is a micro blogging site called tumblr.com

It may seem confusing and overwhelming at first, or you may think it's similar to Pinterest, but it's not. Here is a good place to get started....http://littlespacethings.tumblr.com/post...

There are a lot of creative "littles" out there and if we support them they are destined to do great things for everyone.

As far as the babying him forever so he never moves out...that seems like it would be something you should discuss with him. If he doesn't want to move out, pays rent, and accepts you as his life caregiver who is to say it couldn't work?

I do agree with everyone on the fact that you both should be seeing a mental health professional. I think that you could handle this in so many ways and there are so many nuances to it that it's important to know which way is up at all times, which can be difficult, especially when you are approaching some brave new territory.

Now that I think about it, Kaitlyn, you might be the first mom to openly accept your son as a baby girl. You're a revolutionary. I'm ranting sorry, but the fact is that you have a unique situation! Your life is different and original, and everyday you are writing a story. Perhaps you could blog your experiences yourself. If you decide to do that please let me know as I would love to know how everything turns out!


You are going to be great Kaitlyn it's written in the stars.

SissyBabyGirlInMyPantiesAndDiapers - posted on 09/18/2014

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Here's the truth: Young males are beginning to open up to each other and admit that there is nothing more thrilling, tingly, erotic, taboo, "shameful", and deliciously erotic than:

1) Admitting you want to give in to the fantasy that EVERY little boy has: and finally begin dressing, acting and feeling like a Little Girl...everyboy who has tried it, LOVES it. And the naughty, nasty, "shameful", "humiliating" part of it is also what makes if feel SO GOOD

2) Confessing, first to yourself...and then gradually to friends and potential girlfriends or boyfriends, that you have a growing, overwhelming deep hidden need to give up your power and choose to be an obedient, adorable, precious soft, goo goo gaa gaa BABY GIRL SUCKING A BOTTLE WHILE DRESSED IN A LITTLE GIRL PRINCESS PAMPER.

I know all about this...I grew up in the pre-online world but by 13 my masturbation fantasies were centered on 3 things: 1) The beautiful girls in my class; 2) My craving to be forced by older pretty girls or my mommy or aunties to dress up like a sweet pretty little soft, giggly, prissy princess, as femmy and little girlish as possible, while I was slipped into The Panties Of A Precious Little Girly Girl, my first petticoat girl slip, my first babyish, short, adorable, puffed sleeves, pink, girly girl DRESS, little white sissy girly tights, Mary Janes for my little precious feminine feet...and a pink ribbon for my hair...I dreamed that I would then be stroked, coddled, fondled, touched, whispered to, kissed sensually, and "felt up" under my dress, over my titties, and everywhere else, sending me into a blissful, uninhibited sexual paradise...

I'm now happily married, with an excellent job, having graduated from an elite college, married to a Yale graduate, who understands and allows me to indulge my deep sexual needs related to gender, regression, power, control, and the symbols of compliance, shame, and erotic pleasure...diapers, panties, slips and dresses...

And now, my wife is encouraging me to follow some feelings for soft, feminine, pretty young males that I have secretly indulged since 7th grade...now, I only wish I had gone further during my early adolescence, from 11 to 14, when I was naked and intimate with a total of nine beautiful soft, pretty boys...I only wish I had the courage then to kiss on the mouth...hold each other;s penises...and engage in private boy intercourse...while sharing our need to be babied, diapered, pantied and girly...yum

So, I would explain to your son that ALL little boys have "girl feelings" inside of them; it's only natural...and he is free to indulge in pleasuring his own boy body...while wearing dresses and panties...but only in private, alone. (When he's older you can discuss the possibility of sleepovers with other sweet, gentle girlish baby boys...)

When my wife, or my mom---yes, they both know---or now, my oldest daughter wants to "treat" me, as on my birthday, they've arranged for me to spend the weekend with an "Age Play or Feminization" Professional...where I could enter a world of fantasy...and spend an entire weekend as a diapered toddler...in the most femmy prissy babyish dresses imaginable...Yum!

So let you son induldge, just watch and intervene, as you feel is necessary...and treat him sweetly...buy him adorable panties...and sweet preschool style dresses....encourage him to act and feel more llike a girly girl...and yes, allow him an occasional "Baby Diaper Weekend"....his moans from his bedroom will make you feel very good.

Joel - posted on 08/01/2014

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I went thru these years ago--I have normal relationships and some of my girlfriends and I's best friends, especially as a couple, are with people where one of the couple is an adult baby like me. I have had very little problems with being accepted.
Have your son look on internet and meet other adult babies. They are always middle class normal people with wives, and work every day elc.
My doctor told me I had a diaper fetish, a paraphilia, which would never go away--I could bury it for a while but it would always come back.
If he gets married,have him tell his wife before because it could be big trouble, if he doesn't later on.

Becca - posted on 12/04/2012

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sooo hows things going with your grown baby boy, im sorry not to sound mean

Heather - posted on 11/15/2012

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Ask your son what he wants and needs from you. ONLY he can answer that.



I'm okay with the adult baby fetish that my family member has. We agreed that he will only do it in his room.

Cass - posted on 10/29/2012

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The dressing as a girl is not a big deal. When my little brother was like 5-7 he would wear my moms leather jacket and leather boots and we'd all have a giggle as he strut around the house. It was genuinely funny and there was no mental disturbance that was holding him back from progressing and learning in life. He's a normal and smart kid, the top of his sports team, and working with his dad to save up money for a big hockey tournament in Europe.



I'd say if your son likes to dress as a girl, let him. I was a little tomboy when I was young, and you would never ever see me wearing pink or playing with barbies. I'd be playing outside in the mud and always had short hair. I also knew others like this. Now I'm 21 with a hubby, baby, and pulling my own weight in life. Transgender tendencies aren't automatically unhealthy.



If your son prefers girls clothes, no big deal - just might take a bit of "getting used to." However, this whole baby fetish thing I've never heard of that before, but to be honest my gut is telling me that one is weird. I mean sure, its one thing to play imaginary games once in awhile and pretend to be a baby - still a little immature for 17 year old boy. I was actually shocked when I read that he's 17, I thought you were talking about maybe a 10 year old or something. Full out 24/7 drinking bottle, wearing diapers, and speaking like a toddler and crawling around is too far. Sounds like there may be some unresolved suppressed issue that need to be dealt with or something like that. Seek help from a professional and get him to talk about it. You need to find a deeper understanding of the issue and find solutions when you figure out what's really going on on a deeper level. Be super conscious of how punishment and judgement has the potential of making things worse. Sometimes when people are rejected in vulnerable times such as this one, the issue doesn't heal, but becomes deeper and harder to resolve. Its probably also a hard choice for a mom to go through such a strange situation and have to admit her son needs help - but you have to tough it out and do it asap before things get worse.

Tracy - posted on 10/24/2012

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He wants to be a girl? So what. Let him be whatever gender he is comfortable with. He wants to be a baby? Well, is he being responsible and following "normal" maturity (jobs, girlfriend, car, college, etc...) for his age? If so, though this is potentially disturbing behavior, maybe it will pass. Maybe he's afraid of growing up. Who knows. But if he is really wanting to be a toddler again and not progress into adult responsibilities, then this might be a big issue that needs counseling. I would NOT indulge in the behavior though. Whatever is going on, I can only see that it would complicate the issues. If this doesn't pass soon though, I would certainly seek outside help - they at least might be able to tell you what's going on.

[deleted account]

I agree with the others - get help for him. If he wants to dress as (or be) a woman, that seems to be more and more accepted today. But he will still need help to sort through his feelings and decide how he wants to handle things.



As far as I'm concerned, there is nothing acceptable about being an "adult baby". It's ridiculous and socially unacceptable, and to me it indicates either extreme laziness or serious mental illness, or both. I'm sorry, I don't know why anyone would accept a grown man sucking a bottle and expecting someone to change his diaper. He needs some help before it gets any worse.

Alexandra - posted on 10/23/2012

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I would seek help, go see a professional. As you know this is not the norm and you might have big problems in the future.

L R - posted on 10/23/2012

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I don't mean to sound harsh but I really cannot take this post seriously because any mom would know that this is abnormal and it's time to get help!

Danielle - posted on 10/23/2012

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Hi Kaitlyn,



I have a couple of questions? Is his father around? Is there a male figure to emulate? If not he needs one, along with someone to confide in about what he is feeling.



With that said, I would have to say that I agree with most of the panel, in that this is NOT normal behavior, and something is going on. He needs someone to help you get to the bottom of it, perhaps there has been the wrong message delivered in some fashion (from an outsider).



I commend you for seeking help and advice on this matter, it shows that you are like most mothers, and you care about your child.



Good luck!

Kristin - posted on 10/18/2012

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I agree with LRF this is not normal behavior. My son is 16 and he wont even crawel on the floor to play with his baby sister. It is not cute behavior and it is not healthy, There is no way a normal teen wants to wear diapers unless he is feeling lefty out and this may be a cry for your attention and if there is a baby in the house it could be his way of showing his jealoiusy. Either way you can not enable this behavior and you need to get him some help.

Kaitlyn - posted on 10/16/2012

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We had a talk and it seems that he is just more happy as a girl and loves to pratend to be a baby Im just still totaly lost. He is 17 and he wants to start being and acting like more of a todler. I kust dont know if I should baby him and just let him be a girl so he never moves out or what.

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