oral sex

Dawn - posted on 07/10/2014 ( 8 moms have responded )

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My daughter had recently opened up the discussion that when she had spent the night at her friends house one night her boyfriend and her had met up together and to my suprise she had given her boyfriend a hand job. I had no idea that she would of been even thinking of this behavior yet. Oh was I wrong. So I recently discussed with her dr about birth control. Am I supporting this idea?

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Carrie - posted on 07/10/2014

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>That doesnt sound like my child would do something like that at near age of just 14.

It is indeed shoccking. She does seem quite young for that kind of activity and it's likely oral and full sex will follow soon. Some people say it's the new trend, but I don't totally agree. Was she pressured into this? How did it happen? She couldn't understand the full consequences of her act.

It's normal to want to experiment, but some things do not add up.

♫ Shawnn ♪♫♫ - posted on 07/10/2014

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If she's only 14...I do see a problem with allowing a boyfriend at that age, and allowing them to spend alone time together, but each to her own as far as that goes.

But, since she's active, you better be proactive. Talk, talk, talk about consequences of ill thought out actions. Make sure she understands that, if she wishes to take it further, babies are for life...the next 18 years, at least. Try to get her to understand that, just because her boyfriend wants it doesn't mean she has to do it, and that she should think about that for a bit.

Good luck to you.

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Dawn - posted on 07/12/2014

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The boy is 16 years old. I am positive that her not being able to say no is due to a low self esteem. She has always been more overweight then her friends at school. She is a bigger girl and has the biggest heart and is funny and very smart. But a lot of biys at that age don't see anything except what you look like in a dress.

Carrie - posted on 07/10/2014

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@Dawn

Don't culpabilize or make her feel that she has done something wrong. Unless you want her to turn into BSDM,

> It makes me think the boy had influence on her decision and she was scared to have sex so she tried satisfying him.

Highly possible. What a sick fuck!

If that is the case, find the reason for your daughter's low self-esteem. She should have been able to say no to EVERYTHING. Wow, a 14 year old giving a handjob is a disgusting image in my head. Next time, she might not be able to say no at all.

Dawn - posted on 07/10/2014

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Yes this is a very big eye opener for me. I have sat down and had many talks with her about pregnancy and stds and all of the pressure their is that comes along with the idea of any sexual contact. I never thought that this would be my daughter I would be concerned about. The whole idea of what happened does makes it seem like a pressured topic. It makes me think the boy had influence on her decision and she was scared to have sex so she tried satisfying him.

Dawn - posted on 07/10/2014

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Thanks for the support. You know I always read this stuff about teens and parents and often thought oh my gosh what would I do? That doesnt sound like my child would do something like that at near age of just 14. I suppose I really should appreciate the fact that my daughter had felt comfortable enough to open up and discuss what had happened.

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