Teen daughter wants to date older boy. She is Christian. He is Muslim!

Shelley - posted on 11/13/2017 ( 9 moms have responded )

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I would like advice on whether or not you would let your 16 year old daughter date a 19 year old boy (in his first year of college). ALSO! We (she) is a Christian and he is Muslim. My husband can't get past the age difference (me either), but I don't like that there is such a difference in spirituality. They met last school year while he was a senior and she was a freshman. Thought (Prayed! Hoped!) it was a passing fancy, but they are still trying to see each other. He visited his family in Jordan this past summer, and he brought home, and gave her a ring! What the heck? We've discussed being unequally yoked (1 Corintians 6 :14), and what this means. She left me a letter this morning explaining that she wants to do things with him. I've told her they can be together in a group. She even asked if he can be the one to drive (the group), which we've already told her is not a good idea. Told her we don't know him, and don't like the idea of them possibly being alone in the car. Help!!

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Deanna - posted on 11/16/2017

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Whew that’s a tough one. I can relate. My kids are the exact same ages. I think keeping the lines of communication open are important in this issue. I continue asking relationship building questions and discussing our biblical beliefs with my kids around the kitchen table. We also have an easy-read book about the basics of other religions. It has helped my kids understand some differences. If you want the title, let me know. Have you considered having him and friends over to your house for the “group” activities? I’ll be praying that you will have discernment, wisdom, and good communication with your daughter and the group.

Eyetalktotrees - posted on 12/02/2017

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It sounds like you are doing your best to educate her and honor her own independence and choices in relationships, however, she is still not an adult, especially in the areas of judgment and impulse control. I was in a similar situation in that my 15 yo daughter got involved with a 20 yo. I took the route of allowing them to spend time together in my house, in my presence, sometimes going out with a group which I mistakenly thought was safer. I thought, like some other posters here, that to resist the relationship outright would be futile and might backfire; Unfortunately, even without the huge religious differences to add to the situation, my daughter ended up being sexually assaulted. With the added piece of Islam being so extreme in it's treatments of women AND non-Muslims, and my personal experience, I would do everything in my power to discourage the relationship.

Michelle - posted on 11/15/2017

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I agree that the age gap is a bit of a problem as he is classed as an adult and she is still a minor. She has 2 years before she is an adult and can do what she wants. I agree with group outings but why are you opposed to her driving? You need to learn to trust that you have raised a young lady that can make the right decisions.
In regards to the religions, I think you need to relax on that. We can't help who we fall in love with and that applies to different religions as well.

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Cam - posted on 12/03/2017

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My husband is Muslim and I used to be Roman Catholic. While I love my husband and don't regret getting married and converting to Islam, the road is very difficult. It's not for the weak, I tell you that. But she's 16, let's hope he will find some other girl and leave your daughter alone.

Sarah - posted on 11/26/2017

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I have another article that you may find interesting.
https://www.quora.com/Who-knew-the-Hebre...

Look at Mike Muluk's answer.

My understanding of Islam is that it is an act of conquest to take a non Muslim woman as bride... The bride is automatically considered a Muslim, if she continues to practise her Christian faith, she is apostate and that is a death sentence.
In Islam it is a legitimate act of oppression/conquest to rape a non-Muslim woman.

This is Islam
http://drsircus.com/world-news/islamic-r...

If he converts to Christianity, that is also a death sentence for him. But that is what he needs to do. Islam has no mercy for mankind, no forgiveness of sins, no God who loves us. In Islam, humans are slaves to Allah to do as he wishes - the Quran never mentions that God loves mankind - he doesn't.
Salvation is only in Christ. No converstion - no dating your daughter, although can go out in a group - make sure there is a strong respected young man who will protect the girls.

A lot of what may happen depends on were in the world you live and his personal character and that of his family.

Carol - posted on 11/17/2017

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And there are huge amoun5 reasons.
Age
Religion and how that would change things totally
She dosent need bf this way when it’s time study etc
And hundreds more reasons

Shelley - posted on 11/16/2017

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If you can send me the title of the book, I would love to read it. Thank you!

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