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perfectionist 3 and 1/2 year old won't practice letters

Laurie - posted on 06/11/2010 ( 7 moms have responded )




My daughter can write her name but she is refusing to do it! She'll make the first letter, then get upset that "it's not right!" and scribble it out. I keep telling her writing takes practice and even showed her that pencils have erasers so she can start over. She's not having any of it. Any advice


Rachael - posted on 06/30/2010




Don't make her write her name. If she WANTS to sign something, allow her to draw a self-portrait or just write the first letter. She is likely responding a sense of pressure to perform and her desire is to perform perfectly. At 3.5, she needn't write her name at all. Eventually her manual dexterity will advance and the problem will disappear.


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Jane - posted on 07/14/2010




My advice is this. Leave her alone! She doesn't have to write her name. She's 3-1/2...let her just be :)

Rebekah - posted on 07/12/2010




This is frustrating for her. We went through the same thing with my son. I got alphabet stamps and a bunch of alphabet stickers in the $1 bin at Michael's and he used those to "write" his name and other words he wanted to put on things. OR try letting her use the computer to type. She'll have the interest and coordination to do the handwriting eventually.

Maura - posted on 07/11/2010




Her brain is ahead of her physical development and that is frustrating for her. I would recommend letting it go. Play flashcards, make simple words with flashcards. Continue to stimulate her mind and eventually her body will catch up.

Candi - posted on 07/07/2010




its perfectly normal. when my daughter was in school, she would write her name everywhere. Once she got home, nothing! I bought her workbooks and handwriting tablets to keep up her skills. She loves to do the work, but I won't let her start until she writes her name at the top. Works like a charm. I tell her not to worry if its messy or if the letters are crooked. I just want her to write her name without making her feel like I am pressuring her

Amanda - posted on 06/30/2010




My son was the same way! I don't know how many times I've said that's what erasers are for! LOL After 4 or 5 years of saying it, he actually said it to me the other day when he made a mistake "That's what erasers are for, right mom?" Music to my ears! We finally had to take him to an OT. We found out he is double jointed in his hands and fingers causing him trouble. They gave us a lot of ideas on how to strengthen the muscles in his hands and fingers. We just started and it is still like pulling teeth getting him to write, but they said just get him to try for no more than 10- 15 min. a day. Don't worry, she will get it. He was a little behind when he started Kindergarten in his handwriting. They said if he didn't improve my Dec., to look into OT. He improved dramatically JUST before December break. I decided to still take him to OT due to him complaining of pain when writing.

Linda - posted on 06/15/2010




I'm new at this, so I don't know how much help I will be. My 3 1/2 year old loves learning. I don't really make him do any of the learning, we make more of a game of it and make it fun. Good luck.

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