over 40 with little ones

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Marci - posted on 08/05/2009

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Hi Kim, I am 39 and have an 11 month old. I already kind of feel bad for her knowing she's gonna have one of the oldest parents in her class and wondering also if I'm going to be as understanding and open minded as I want to be for her when she is older.
Hope you are well!
Marci

Cynthia - posted on 08/05/2009

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Hello. I'm a single 44 yr old with 4 children and I'm doing it alone as well. My oldest son is 24 and in the Marines, my second son is 11 and he's Autistic. That's a challenge by itself. I also have twin daughters, they are 9.

Angela - posted on 08/05/2009

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Me also, Well there is 5 years between my daughter and son. So, not a huge difference. But the youngest is more like an 'only child' because of the age barrier. And the older kids sometimes resent the relationship the youngest has with his dad. Their dad wasn't around much and definitely didn't put them first. Ages are Ben 18, Sara 16 and Joshua 11.

Jackeline - posted on 08/05/2009

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Hi Kim, I know all about the tired part. Are you doing it alone? If so, hang in there, it may not get easier but they grown fast (heavy sigh) If not, you are lucky, it's hard work and help is important sometimes. When I get home from my 1 hour commute, I have to cook, clean up what I can, maybe do a load of laundry so I'm not bombarded on the weekend and my little girl (5) has missed me all day and wants my total attention. Tough sometimes. My older ones are self sufficient, they work and go to college, so I don't rely on them for any help. After all, I'm the one who had the baby. I found that I now require little sleep and little food, funny how you can get used to the strangest things...

Kimberly - posted on 08/05/2009

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My name is Kim I'm 41 and work fulltime. I have a 4 yr old girl and a 14 mo old boy. Life is hard at times and I'm tired all the time. More Later.

Jackeline - posted on 08/05/2009

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Hello Everyone,

I', 44 with a 23 year old girl in college, a 21 year old son in college and a 5 year old who will start school in Sept. Challenging to do it alone, but totally worth it. Proud Mommy over here! I am physically tired (working Mom) sometimes get lonely (Single Mom) but again, totally worth it.

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Hi Kim. I have a 24 year old daughter, (2 granddaughter by her one is 5 the other is about to be 6), and son who's 18, and another one who's also about to be 6 (tomorrow). talk about busy.

Kyra - posted on 08/05/2009

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Hey kimberly, I have 6 kids. My oldest is almost 23 and my youngest is almost 14 weeks and i am 46. How about you? I have to be honest having a newborn has been challenging but so rewarding. Kyra

Elley - posted on 08/04/2009

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hi kimberly im new on here and i must say ive found it very rewarding just reading many moms msgs of support if u fancy a chat just shout i have a boy of 5 and im 45 very tireing but rewarding x

Christina - posted on 08/04/2009

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I have a 19 yr old son, a 3 1/2 yr old son and a daughter that is 15 months. I love being able to do it all again!! & this time there are two of them. They definately keep me on my toes!

Sheila - posted on 08/04/2009

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Kim my kids are older. 29, 27, & 23. When I had the 23 year old it was like starting a brand new family. He and I are closer than the other two, I had more patients & still do towards him. Having a second chance is great. I wish I would have had a chance to start over at least after at least 35, I had more patients, I was the go to Aunt, I baby sat for over 15 years raising my great niece's & Nephew's, but I lost the physical ability to have anymore kids after 32. you become so much more laid back & the kids come first not trivial things like house work.

Gina - posted on 08/04/2009

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I am 43 with a 6-almost 7 year old girl and an 8 going on 18 year old girl- 14 months apart- someone has a terrible sense of humor- don't yaou think?

Leslie - posted on 08/04/2009

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I just turned 44 and I have one daughter who will be 19 months next week. I am doing it alone....I thought I had faced challenges before in my life...but having her is like going back to high school again and not being a popular kid! (she was an oops...my dr didn't realise that the Pill is not so effective on women over 40, lol).

Lesley - posted on 08/04/2009

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Am 41 (almost 42) and have a 14 year old, 6 year old and 4.5 year old (all boys) and the thing I find most difficult is finding family activities to suit all ages I don't know about you!

Sandy - posted on 08/03/2009

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I am in the same boat my children are 27, 24, 22, 20, 17, 4 and 2. My grandchildren are the same age as my youngest two. I'm raising the little ones alone. I used to say "I can't believe I have to do all this myself" I'm now trying the positive approach and saying "Thank God I have the energy to do this myself". It really make a difference.

Nancy - posted on 08/03/2009

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Hi Kim! I am 40 and have a 3 year old boy. It looks like you (ok, all of us) have a lot of support options, but if you ever need to talk, rant, yell or laugh - even if for no apparent reason - I am here. :)

Jenelle - posted on 08/03/2009

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Hi, I'm 45 with 2 stepsons (40 and 35) and 2 great kids of our own 6 and 8. We tried for a long time and we were finally blessed when I was 36. I agree, we don't have the energy that younger women have but we have a (little) bit more patience.

Virginia - posted on 08/03/2009

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Hi -- I'm 45 and mom to a 27 yo boy....and hoping for a new one to join my family in March/April 2010 (we have just completed ivf and are 5 wks pregnant). My husband and I met later in life, tried to get pregnant initially and got tired of the treatments....but decided last year to try just a bit more, and it worked! Hopefully everything will go well!

Kathy - posted on 08/03/2009

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Hi all! I'm 44 and I have 3 kids, a 25 year old son and my girls are 21 and 6. I also have a 3 year old grandaughter and my grandson is due in October.

Betsy - posted on 08/03/2009

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Hi all! I have 3 sons...27, 20. and 4. Thought I was going to enjoy "the after the kids life", got remarried, and now have a 4 year old. It's great though, seeing everything again from "new" eyes. At 45, I never expected to do all this again! He is keeping me active (he never stops going, like the Energizer bunny!!!!) Congrats to all of you! Just remember...LIFE IS SWEET!!!

Daryl - posted on 08/03/2009

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Hi I just turned 54 and my son is 7 years old he just started second grade today I love being an older mom I think I have more patience now than I would have had when I was younger and I know I'm smarter, the only down side may be being around for grand kids and great grand kids.

Tina - posted on 08/03/2009

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Hi Kimberly,
Wow, is it a whole different story having kids when we are older. I have my first when I was 19. Got remarried and had 2 more at 36 and 38. Almost died in childbirth for both of them but that was the easy part. Since then I have increasingly had chronic pain that has worsened until now I have it every day. I am on 2 strong medications to deal with it. I also homeschool my 2, which are now 14 & 16. At one time I homeschool my 2 grandsons at the same time - which made 4. I have homeschooled them thru their whole school life.
I was over forty and you just don't have the energy as you did when you were younger. I believe I had more patience when they were young, there are some things that are easy being an over 40 mom, but some things are a lot harder. Now at 52 with teens, life is good. If you have your health, thank God for it ever day. My husband was put out of work permanently disabled a few years ago so between the two of us we just can't do a lot with them. Advise- Take care of yourself because you have many years to go. You will be in your fifty when they are teens. They will need you. Develop a close relationship with them. My son comes to me about girlfriend issues regularly and that is just what you want. Be kind to them. My husband once said to me when I was complaining about a teaching issue - Honey, they don't think like you do. You have a lifetime of experience to influence your logic but they are only kids. They can't comprehend things like adults do. It was an eye opener for me. Just love them and thank God for them and their health every day. Hope this gives you something to think about. Have a great day and a great life.

Tammy - posted on 08/03/2009

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Hello !!! KIMBERLY I am tammy I have 2 children .. my daughter is 20 and my son is 6. I had my son when I was 36, I am now 43 .HE was a total surprise But such a nice one!!! I think having a small child after 40 is wonderful. I think I am a better parent now.I also think I have more time now too.Also at school it's becoming a new trend I do believe.I was not the only older MOM there. and me and my husband did not feel like the grandparents when we take him to tee-ball or to the park !!! LOL!!(btw my husband is almost 50 ) I love to rub that in !!!

Laurie - posted on 08/03/2009

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Kim,
I am soon to be 45 with 5 children, 6, 7 11, 12 and 22. The 22 year old is on her own living in Michigan. It is very challenging finding something to fit all needs. I have to send the 6 and 7 year old to Grandma's house sometimes when the older ones want to do something age appropriate for them. It is getting harder and harder as the older ones are entering the teen years. Not to mention, I have one boy (7 year old) the rest are girls. He is starving for boys to play with.

Wendy - posted on 08/03/2009

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I am 43 and have a single child, a boy who just turned 6. I used to think 50 was the perfect age until I got pregnant. Now its 55 (he'll be 18 then).

Anne - posted on 08/03/2009

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hi kim my oldest 3 have left home and im bringin up my youngest on my own hes 8 ive also got 5 grandchildren ranging from 12 to 15 months

Jocelyn Renada - posted on 08/02/2009

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My oldest ones are 25, 23, and 21 my younger ones are 7 and 6. Busy Busy Busy

Toni - posted on 08/02/2009

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Hi Kim,

I'm 43 I have a 24 yo boy 22 yo girl and an adopted seven yo girl. My son blessed me with a grandson who is 20mons. I love it. I have more patience this time around and I stop and smell the roses more and enjoy her childhood. I don't rush everything anymore..

Veronica - posted on 08/02/2009

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Hi Kimberly, I am a brand new mom of 3 little ones, a 3 yr girl, 4 yr and a 6 yr old boys. I lost a 2 yr old son 2 yrs ago, nearly gave up on life then bam jumped into fostering these 3 and looking forward to adopting them and yea I am over 40. Glad I am older and wiser while raising kids, I couldn't have handled the pressure when I was younger.

Verna - posted on 08/02/2009

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Hi Kimberly, my name is Verna and I am a 55yr old Stepmom.....children live with us. I have 2 older girls that are married and live out of town. If you have any questions, write me anytime. I will listen...if needed.

Teresa - posted on 08/02/2009

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I'm going to be 42 in October. Our son just turned 2 a few days ago and we're trying to have another. My husband and I met late in life and we've been married for just over 3 years.



How many kids do you have and what ages?

Lori - posted on 08/02/2009

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Hi Kimberly,



I am a single mom to 2 kids girl almost 15 yrs old and a boy 4 yrs old. The fun part is the hormones coming into everything. I am 44 and starting pre-menopause. It is good but can be stressful. I work fulltime and we just bought our first house.

Lori

Kerri - posted on 08/02/2009

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Hi Kim:
I am a 41 year old (single) Mother of a 14 year old boy and I have a set of twins that are 4. My life has changed, but I am so glad it did. Starting over was overwhelming at first but it is amazing and rewarding.

Carol - posted on 08/01/2009

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Hi Kim,
I'm new on here but I am 41 and my boys are ages 17, 15, 12, 8, and 1 year on Tues.
I totally understand the feeling of being pulled in several directions at once.

Dorrie - posted on 08/01/2009

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Hi Kim--I'm Dorrie. I'm 42 and have a 19 month old. He just got out of a cast he was in for 3 weeks. Broke it going down a slide. He's pretty amazing, my little son, he's almost back to where he was before the cast. Walking pretty well, I think. Sometimes I'm tired and sometimes I'm just not sure I'm doing the best job, but then he claps and giggles at something I've done for him and all that tired and questioning mostly goes away. Hang in there. Happy to chat.

Christina - posted on 08/01/2009

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Hi Kim - I am a 40 year old mom of a 15 month old. Sure there are challenges unique to the situation of being an older mom of little ones...but every situation has its challenges. Personally I take comfort in knowing I'm a bit wiser, calmer, and more responsible, and focused than I was 20 years ago when I first married.

There seem to be a bunch of us here ready to help swap experiences and advice which is always great! We're not alone. ~Christina

Deanne - posted on 08/01/2009

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Hi Kimberly - I'm new here. I'm 43 and my daughter is almost 8! I am also a single mom 24/7 (dad abandoned us around 3rd month of pregnancy) and there are definitely days when I feel over 40!!! :-) For the most part though, I think there are a lot of advantages to having children later...I'm more patient than I was at a younger age, definitely more self-confident and don't constantly question every decision I make, and I had a lot of fun before I had kids, so I don't "wish I would of before I had kids". I know it is tiring, but hang in there and remember to take care of yourself too! Here if you need to chat. - Deanne

Monae - posted on 08/01/2009

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Hi Kim - I'm 47 and I have a 7 yr old daughter. My husband and I met later in life and I didn't have her til I was 40 (obviously). Anyway, how old are your children? Here if you need to hollar. Or if you just need encouragement to find the energy, I know that's really hard sometimes :)

Phyllis - posted on 08/01/2009

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Hi Kim

I'm 41.I have a 16 year old daughter & a almost 10 month old daughter. We didn't think we were going to have anymore children then surprise. There isnothing like starting all over. Best part I never knew I was pregnant until 4 hours before delivering. Hang in there.

Phyllis

Shirley - posted on 08/01/2009

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Hi Kimberly, I'm 41 soon and have 2 stepdaughters (26 and 20) and a 4 year old daughter, hoping to have yet another one next year. My hubby was the one that started again and has done great at it!

Deb - posted on 08/01/2009

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Hi Kimberly. I have soon to be 4 children (due in 10 days) My girls are 13yr and 11yr and son is 4yr. Soon to be born daughter due on the 11th of August. I just turned 42 and family will be complete after "Savannah's" birth. Welcome!

Donna - posted on 08/01/2009

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hi Kim, I have four boys 23,23,20,17, and one girl,, 15 I now take care of a 3yrs old lil girl,,..My husband never had any kids,, its fun watching him grow...with a little one around fulltime...he fun...very challenging...but a joy...

Robin - posted on 08/01/2009

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Kimberly - I'm 49 and have a nearly 10 month old son and a 9 year old stepson. Waiting to find out next week if we're adding to the family again. There's lots of us out there!

Leanne - posted on 08/01/2009

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My 17 year old daughter is now 5'9" and my almost 16yr old just passed me up as well! :) Great job raising 2 kiddos on your own!

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