18 weeks and haven't told people and sex problems

Tiff - posted on 01/23/2014 ( 5 moms have responded )

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I'm 18w3days pregnant with baby boy #3 I don't know how to tell everyone as I have a 3 yr old who is 4 in March and a 8 month who is 1 in May. I have a very hard family to please and I'm getting my tubes tied straight after the birth I don't even leave the hospital. It's also hard because my SO I have been with since I was 16 I'm turning 21 in May young I know. I love him to death but when we make love I'm kind of grossed out it's been like this since I was pregnant with baby number 2. Please help any advise is appreciated!

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Rachel - posted on 01/26/2014

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Maybe you are suffering from mild depression. I know I was the same way after I had my daughter, and going through post partum. I'd start out being in the mood, but once it came time to get down to business, I would start wondering why he was even interested because I felt like I was disgusting. It put a strain on things for a while, but when I went back to work on weekends, I started feeling useful and like myself again. Maybe you just need a little more time for you, doing things you like?

Cc - posted on 01/25/2014

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As long as you are okay with having another baby, you will just have to bear with your family. I had similar issues with having a second child out of wedlock with half of my family being conservative Catholics. I just focus on my family and my relationship and when people make remarks or try to give me "talks" I just stick by my own beliefs and try to be respectful of their beliefs. Behind it all, we all love each other. I just keep a healthy distance. I waited until about 4 months to share.
Regarding the sex...I hated sex after second son until he was about 11 months. Hang in there...try to talk to your SO about it so he knows it's not uncommon. I used to have sex just to please him every once in a while and rarely enjoyed it. It's tough, but hopefully temporary.

Tiff - posted on 01/24/2014

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This should be baby number seven I have a strong history in losing babie which is why I didn't tell people and why they will do my tube cause I mentally can't Lose another baby. I don't care what others think I just don't know how to tell people ! I have tried therepy didn't change any thing I am still sexually attracted to my so it's just when we start doing stuff that I don't like it but the thought of it sound great.

Jodi - posted on 01/24/2014

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With regard to the not knowing what to tell anyone, why do you even care what others think? It's none of their business.

Secondly, I am surprised a doctor will tie your tubes at such a young age - aren't you worried that you may change your mind in 15 years? I certainly wouldn't recommend such a permanent decision at your age. Women often regret the decision to do this when they were so young.

Finally, with regard to the sex, have you considered therapy to help you with this issue and to get to the bottom of why you feel this way?

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