Am I cheating my son because I don't want to be with his father?

Abby - posted on 12/08/2012 ( 2 moms have responded )




I don't even know where to begin. My son's father and I are not together. We've gone back and forth from day one of simply dating four years ago, but now I'm 20. My son is 14 months, and my son's father is just immature. I'm over the drama of him not having a job, not interacting like he should, and the comments made towards me during our relationship about my past, or stupid things. Thats a whole other story. But anyways, I've decided to officially break it off with him for good. I don't want my son to have to be around us yelling at each other or me being in a bad mood because of his BS. But now that we're in the stage of I hate you you hate me and all the mean hateful things are being texted and said back and forth there is one thing that just really bugs me.

He always say that I'm cheating my son because I don't want to be with him.

Any one have any comments on this? I mean I push and push for him to act on his visitation, but its all drama and he just ignores me when it comes to our son. I am in no way trying to keep my son from him, but I don't want my son thinking like his father. I don't know. Anything would be nice. I just need someones voice besides his in my head.


Michelle - posted on 12/08/2012




It's more detrimental to your son to be around parents that don't get along. You also need to give yourself the chance to meet your perfect partner as he obviously isn't.

Your son will be happier if you are happier so don't listen to him. Also don't respond to his text messages etc. You are only fueling the fire and making yourself more upset. Tell yourself that he is still a child and until he decides to act his age then he doesn't deserve any response from you. It will infuriate him to start off with but hopefully he will slowly understand he can't bully you into doing what he wants.


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Cass - posted on 12/09/2012




it would be cheating your son by indirectly teaching him that being truly happy is unimportant

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