Am I just a fool?

Evalyn - posted on 06/05/2014 ( 1 mom has responded )




Hi All, I am a single, working mother of a girl aged 2 and a boy that is 19 months. I always do my best disciplining them, giving them all the time and love I have. Personally I don't think that I'm a bad mother. I'm actually very proud of myself for reaching goals with regards to my children. I do my best to look well after them, although being a mom and a dad is definitely not easy.

My little boy has a very bad temper. Throws tantrums and screams for me to pick him up. I have different ways to discipline him. From ignoring him, to giving him time out, to distracting him, to sometimes giving him a hiding. Sometimes it helps, sometimes it doesn't. I am coping with it. I think it just takes time to discipline them.

However, my girl listens to me most of the time, just very cheeky. But she help me so much with everything, she is very lovable and loves to keep herself busy. I discipline her differently because she is not as difficult as her brother. Usually I just count to 3 then she listens. But she can be so CHEEKY sometimes.

Now my problem is, I started dating a while ago. Got a little serious with 2 of the guys (not at once, lol). One had a 7 year old boy, and the other one doesn't have kids of his own.... Both times it didn't work out. Different reasons. The only thing that's similar with these guys, is both of them told me that my kids are brats. They walk all over me and I will never get a boyfriend with kids like mine. I personally feel that my kids really are not that bad. I have seen worse, and I have different ways of disciplining them. I also feel that my kids are my everything, they give me love, they aren't naughty all the time, and I cant just hit them all the time. That doesn't work. I will give up ANY guy for my kids. If I feel the person treats my kids like crap, he must go. Easy as that. I think its a six sense or something.... I don't mind others trying to help disciplining my kids, but its like I can feel the difference between caring and aggravating discipline.

Is there anyone that feels the same? Or maybe I am wrong.... should I be more strict, or just ignore the comments of the exes?

Thank you


Jenn - posted on 06/05/2014




I applaud you for being willing to put your children first! Good job!

Your parenting style is your own. And, given that these men are not the father, they do not get a say in how you parent your children.

Do you have any close friends/family that you could ask for an honest opinion about your childrens' behavior? Someone you know would tell you the truth, even if it hurt? That's the best way to know for sure whether what you heard was just these men being petty & seeking attention for themselves, or if there is an issue.

I believe you're probably right, and your kids are probably good kids (I'm not there -- I won't judge). But, it's always good to ask for a trusted opinion. :)

If several people tell you the same thing, you can trust it. If it's just one or two, I'd ignore it.

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