anyone have a jealous spouse toward the kids

Amanda - posted on 05/28/2009 ( 11 moms have responded )

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i have to keep reminding my husband he is the adult in the situation dealing with our kids. he seems jealous toward how much attention our kids get versus him anymore. anyone got any suggestions?

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Quillerm - posted on 11/28/2013

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Our problem is the wife of our Relative is jealous of the attention he gives other children in the family. They have no children of their own, but every time there is a reunion, the wife expresses contempt, and jealously when her husband plays with the kids.

Amanda - posted on 05/30/2009

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i just feel like it yu have kids, you should spend as much time with them as yu do with yourself, when i ask for alone time it is to grocery shop or bra shop which is hard with kids. he goes out with friends and has some drinks and hangs out. yu made the kids it is time to be a dad and not as much of a friend as he is.

Amanda - posted on 05/30/2009

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i try to make time for myself because i know i need it but he has trouble watching the kids no longer then i am at work. he goes out all the time to play hisself. i feel like it you get time to yourself , i should too. at least i would just be going grocery shopping by myself. he goes out with friends. if these were not his kids, just mine i could undersstand, but come on already, you made them it is time to step up.

Charlie - posted on 05/29/2009

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i make sure my fiance and i have time to ourselves where we dont talk about kids we just pay attention to each other i feel people can get so swept away from their relationship once they have kids , children are amazing , and wonderful but i just keep in mind i only have these children because of mine and my partners love for each other and that gives me strength even when im too tired to make time for him and he does the same for me , its a good example for our child as well to see how much his parents love each other and hopefully when he grows up and finds a girl he will treat her the same .

Tiffanie - posted on 05/29/2009

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Just explain got him how you are feeling and ask him y he is so jelous of your kids. I understand you guys need alone time together but its not always possible. Maybe set out some time after the kids go to bed and wheather it be just sitting together watching a movie or go outside and sit and chat. I was getting jelous of my hubby going out all the time. He would come home from work play with the kids for a few hours then leave. I got really mad because there was no me and him time. sounds selfish I know but I still got mad. Now he only goes out once a week and he only goes out on Monday's becuse he goes to a friends house to watch monday night raw. But the rest of the week after the kids are in bed (7pm) all 3 of them 4in a half, 19 month old and an almost 3 month old. We usually watch a movie, or just sit and talk or even just cuddle. Best of Luck to you

Veronica - posted on 05/29/2009

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Ok, I really think maybe a counselor is needed here. And this will be my last post, i dont care to listen to women undermine their husbands - this is a problem that is between you and your husband, not 'you, your husband, and cyberspace' Im really serious on this one -- go seek help with a professional. Good luck - and close this thread down too.

Amanda - posted on 05/28/2009

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i guess but he should be able to be the adult and spend as much time with his boys as i do and maybe he wont be so jealous of the time i spend with them because i can get things done while he has them. and have more time for him.

Rachael - posted on 05/28/2009

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but he is a husband still along with being a daddy just like you are mom and wife. I know it's hard but you have to find a balance that works for both of you. maybe he is acting childish because he knows you will respond to it and give him the attention he has been seeking just like a child would.

Amanda - posted on 05/28/2009

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i thought a mommas boy would not have a problem with me spending more time and energy with my kids besides him, but he is childish toward our kids when he doesnt get his way and our kids get new things. how do i make him understand he is not a husband anymore, he is a daddy?it aint about him anymore...

Veronica - posted on 05/28/2009

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I think it may be time for you and your husband to have a good healthy talk. Asking him what is going on. Use "I feel this way, when this happen..." kind of statements. Let him know what YOU feel, and find out what HE feels - no interupting each other either, really truly listen, and see what can be changed, or compromised... this won't happen over night, so it may be an ongoing subject for a while, but its a very important one that should be taken seriously - Take care.

Ashley - posted on 05/28/2009

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It can be hard to balance kids and a spouse. The changes that it makes on your relationship can often be harder on the man, as you have had 9 months to get used to the idea of being a mom, and yes he knew a kids were coming but it's different.



You are probably exhausted and I don't blame you at all if you seem to have no time for him. But it can be hard for them to understand, Do you have family or friends that can take the kids for a few hours a couple times a month so you guys can have adult time or date night or something. It may seem like it will take a lot from you at first, but I am sure that in the end you will end up enjoying the time without the kids, be it just hanging out at hom or going for dinner or something. You may even find yourself looking forward to this time together.



Now if you are doing stuff like that and he is still thinking he is not getting enough time and attention you have to look at how mature he is.



Good luck :)

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