Anyone having trouble finding friends?

Donaji - posted on 06/28/2012 ( 52 moms have responded )

3

0

0

Since I graduated high school I lost many friends and now that I had my son I lost many more due to them not having a responsibility or some making other mommy friends. I'm home alone with my son all day and want to get out with friends but many don't want to deal with my son and or understand I have a resposibty to attend him first and may not always be available. What should I do?

MOST HELPFUL POSTS

Leanne - posted on 08/13/2012

19

26

3

I live on the central coast, I work full time ,but I'm available on weekends for a walk to the park. I also have a son aged 4 and i understand how much attention is needed with children.

Keri - posted on 07/01/2012

363

40

0

There are several parents/moms groups out there. Hit up www.meetup.com. It's free to join and many of the groups are free, but some charge a nominal yearly fee because there is a fee the adiministrator of the group must pay to meetup. You can also find book clubs, cooking clubs, etc. if that's what you want.

Ashley - posted on 06/29/2012

149

22

4

Im 27 with two kids and have been in this boat for 7 yrs. I stay at home all day n night n I only get a life when I can get a sitter and I go act like im in my early 20's again. I dont have alot of friends n actually I dont mind to much. I have the few I want to do stuff with n they deal with the fact that I have kids but I try not to bring them around too much so it works out. Find a babysitter n go have fun yourself.

52 Comments

View replies by

Chantal - posted on 08/27/2012

21

11

0

Hi all I posted here a while back...Im 22 and have 2 kids one is 2 almost 3 and the other is brand new lol, live in ON...not sure if this site in international or not...we should make a playdate :) you can msg me on facebook if you want... Chantal Dupuis

Amanda - posted on 08/22/2012

5

0

1

You do have friends, your kids! Your creating the type of people you would want be around it is a full time job with very little vacation time. It is important to get out once and again and be you with out the guidelines to parenting dictating your actions! My three yr. Old is a diabaetic so I get out that much less and have just a hand ful if that of friends who I trust to influence my children. Thank god for family! I think that moms in the boat should row together we understand echother have lots in common and we are building relationships for our children. It is all about the kids no matter how you look at it. But playdates are for moms too! Any one?

Allison - posted on 08/18/2012

1

0

0

Im in the same boat but I just moved so I don't know anyone where I live now.

Stefanie - posted on 08/17/2012

32

0

8

I too have the same problem. All my friends for HS have moved on, have families of their own and new friends. I'm just sort of here. I never really had a lot of friends in HS, and I'm not sure I even know how to make new friends anymore.
My "friends" consist of people from work and my husbands friends. I'm not 100% comfortable with all of his friends either... I just feel like I don't fit in, or they don't really like me, just put up with me because of him. I don't get invited to things, and when I do go out to any of their get togethers I feel like I'm only there because he was invited!
It gets me down quite freqently. I've lost interest in a lot of the things I used to do. 28 years old and I feel like I'm 48 because i don't do anything but work, sleep, eat, clean house go grocery shopping and pay bills :(

Kristin - posted on 08/17/2012

1

0

0

MARIA,
I live in Rancho and am a mother of twins. We should try and see if we could meet for coffee or something.

Kristin
knowles2113@gmail.com

Maria - posted on 08/14/2012

5

0

2

Hello and I'm glad to know that I'm not the only one that feels lonely now that I'm a mother. I need some friends, specially near where we live, and have play dates for my 17 month old. If any of you live near Chino Hills, CA or in Chino Hills, please let me know.

I would love to meet other mothers and share stories. Thanks Donaji for giving me the courage to post my question.

Brittani - posted on 08/13/2012

7

0

0

I know just how you feel.. I had my son feb of last year and I mostly lost all my friends because of it. They didn't understand that I had responsibility's to take care of now and that I couldn't do the things I used too. Til this day I don't have any friends and I sit at home with my son alone until my fiance gets home. I'm so tired of being home alone all the time and not having anything to do but clean the house I want to be able to get out with a friend or two and do something .

Crystalclear - posted on 08/13/2012

0

0

1

I am a 23years old mum .my son is 8 months old. i really get so0o0 bored by sitting home all the time.need some mums in my friend cycle.

Annam - posted on 08/12/2012

7

18

3

My situation is exactly the same as yours..i stay at home all day..me n my kids..so want to find friends..because at so e point u need to talk to someone...all the time time u cant b playing with the kids..no doubt they r the biggest blessing...but doing all the home stuff n everything u need.a friend...i live in Glenroy..Victoria ..Melbourne..anyone from there plz.????

Annam - posted on 08/12/2012

7

18

3

Seriusly..its very true...i qm settling i Melbourne..Glenroy ..Victoria..have no friends at all..anyone from there.....i so want friends....

Rachel - posted on 08/08/2012

4

0

1

Any single mum in London who would like to be in touch. It is hard being a single mum.

Nicole - posted on 08/05/2012

1

0

2

i'm in the same boat as all of you. i'm 26 ad i have a soon to be 1 year old daughter and another one on the way (mydue date is dec 3rd). ever since i got married to my husband, both of our friends started floating away but it got worse when we had our daughter, all of our friends just want to partyall the time. a few "friends" have asked us if wewanted to hang out but we would tell them that we would have to takeour daughter withus and they basically threw a fit and said " well cant you find a babysitter"? and we tried explaining them that finding a sitter isnt as easy as they would think. after that, they started getting rude and ignorant withus. but, thats what happens when you have your priorities set on your family/kids instead of making it to a bar every weekend. itstheir loss, not yours. my best advice to give to you is go "explore" and see id there is any activities in your area that includes your children. also when you do make friends that hve kids of their own, they will b more understnding and they will have the same priorities as you. by the way, i love taking my daughter places, she is very observant and she gets excited when she sees new things

Patty - posted on 08/04/2012

3

0

0

i know how you feel, my fiancee is in the army and we just moved to maryland ive been hear almost 7 months and i still have no friends, ive got 2 little girls and it seems the only time i go out is when i go to the store or doctors appointments, other then that im always home... i hardly talk to anyone so it gets really depressing at times :/

User - posted on 08/04/2012

57

1

13

Im in san diego too, Jeanna :) my baby is 3 months though :P you could always try putting her in sports :)

Jeanna - posted on 08/03/2012

2

0

0

Wow! Going on this site has made me realize I am not the only one looking for friends! I am a stay at home mom and I am lost. I don't know where to start looking to find friends. I really miss having adults to talk to. I live in San Diego, Ca and have a 5 year old. I know she wants friends too just like me!!

User - posted on 08/02/2012

57

1

13

Same here!! once i got pregnant and wanted to sleep more than party i lost all my 'friends' where do you live?

Christina - posted on 07/19/2012

7

6

1

this seems to be and issue with ALOT of people. all of my friends just want to party all the time and i'm not one of those parents who can just drop there child wherever just so I can go out. I would love to have friends to talk about my daughter with, and for my daughter to have little play dates and things like that.

Chauntel - posted on 07/17/2012

1

21

0

Hi girls!! I was in this boat also up until a couple years ago.... I sell Mary Kay now (no, I'm not trying to pitch it to anyone, I'm just answering the question). I leave my daughter (now 7) with a friend or family member an evening/day or two a week so I can get out and be with people! Sounds corny, but it works! So, not only am I getting out and meeting new people/making new friends, I'm making money at the same time. Some of you may have the response that you have no one to watch your child while you do something like that (if you were to decide to), my answer - bring him/her with you, if your child is capable of sitting still for an hour or so most women don't mind. I have only had 1 or 2 women decide to reschedule their appointment to times when I had a babysitter because they didn't want me to bring my daugther with me, and I've been doing this for 4 1/2 years. Let me know if you want any info or anything. Hope this helps!

Kaya - posted on 07/17/2012

1

0

0

I am a 20 year old young mum and yes that baby in the pram is mine! My daughter is 10 months old and although shes a real handfull i do feel my mind slowly going to mush as we play the same games over and over again when will peek a boo get boring? I Would like to meet freinds with an valued intrest with there child. i go on play sessions with my little one 2 times a week one a gym session the other a music open gym day, we both enjoy swimming twice a week and attend one libary session. i would like to meet some new freinds and am allways looking for opportunities for meeting new people! i am new to this site but if you would like to contact me further my name is kaya marsh on facebook. my picture is yellow and has the words you are my sunshine. would love to hear of mummys!

Nia - posted on 07/17/2012

1

0

0

Same here! I'm 21 just moved, married my husband and now we have a 2 1/2 month old baby boy. I just haven't made many friends out here and I've just been looking for ways to connect with other moms and I fell upon this site this morning. but I know exactly what you mean, because of all our responsibilities, it's more challenging to hang out and just get up and go just anywhere.

Leah - posted on 07/17/2012

8

28

2

We give up a lot having children I felt the same as you girls. Now my children are getting older and all my friends are having them. You have to make your own plans and meet new people or your going to go crazy. Joining groups or sports with you child is a great idea. It will get better.

Jennifer - posted on 07/12/2012

12

0

1

I have two 7 year olds and a 5 year old, just went back to work part time seasonal but still consider myself a sahm. Ive been a mom since I was 20 and it still isnt any easier to find friends. I get so bored at home all day, and it gets very frustrating to deal with three screaming kids all day and not have anyone to talk to... The best thing I have found to do is find a moms support group in your area ( I just moved back to SD and there isnt one in my area anywhere lol) but that is normally a good place to start meeting other moms

CHARLENE - posted on 07/12/2012

22

0

1

thats what happened to me. am 23 and long gone are the days where i even get invites out now. Ave been branded a MUM so i guess to my friends that means we arent allowed to still enjoy life. Thing is they are not kids forever and soon enough you old friends will have kids and your will no longer be a baby and you dont have as much responsibility, they will be old enough for day care etc. Just enjoy your baby. If they are real friends they will find away to still be in your life x

Kristin - posted on 07/11/2012

3

0

0

I'm 30 now, i had my daughter when i was 19 so i finished High School and didnt go to college. During pregnancy everyone was all about me and helping out and visiting when they could. After i had my first daughter, my friends visited less and less, untill nothing at all. They kinda faded out. I had 1 friend, she had a baby a year after i had mine, so we were in the same boat, to this day, she is my only true, long lasting friend. But even after my girls got older and i can go out and enjoy myself, i have nobody to go out with, i have work friends, and sometimes we hang out as a group once a month or so, but nothing to really call a friendship. So if anyone has a solution to the problem, i'm all ears.

Ebony - posted on 07/11/2012

3

16

0

I understand exactly were u are coming from.I have 4kids and I barley have time to myself.I think key is to get out and enjoy the day.wit your child.If.you.ever wanna.hook up contact me.We can do the park,the pool,the mall.......u can still enjoy ur lyfe!!!

Christina - posted on 07/11/2012

7

0

1

HI Moms

I feel the same way. We recently moved and all of my friends are in a different city, not to mention they dont have children. So our ideas of going out are very different now. My baby is only four months old i found that joining activity groups through the early year center has helped with socializing and getting out once a week.

Angelina - posted on 07/10/2012

1

0

0

Ladies I'm in the same boat my girl is 4 and I don't have much friends,feel like I'm stuck in the same routine day in day out plus I'm a single mum. It gets really lonely at times.Ladies we should all meet some day or form our own mummy club

Steph - posted on 07/09/2012

17

4

0

Hi, Im new here. I am a unemployed single mom of a 4 year old girl :) Im going through a break up and Im very shy but lonely.
Wouldnt mind some friends myself. Find me on facebook if youd like: Stephany Toenniges.

Amie - posted on 07/09/2012

84

4

11

Same thing happened to me, I thought I had friends in high school but then after we graduated no one stayed in touch with me. So I'm a mom and now all I got is my son. And I try to make mommy friends but they don't seem interested. I went to church a few times and they got good nursery play time there but its only for a few. Add me as a friend on facebook, I'm looking for good mommy friends I can relate to and share stories with.

Melissa - posted on 07/09/2012

13

5

0

I have the same problem,the best advice I can give you is start making friends with other parents. Take your son to the park and try starting conversations with other moms. You can also take your son to parent and child activities, like art classes and library circle groups, activities like these will allow you to meet other parents and make new friends who have the same priorities as you and who understand that you can't always be available.

Tiffany - posted on 07/08/2012

7

4

0

Try your local libiary. I know ours has preschool and baby story time. I have met many great friends that way. Get to know them and start doing play dates, when ur son finds someone he likes. That way they are a mom too. And nine times out of ten they know exactly what your going threw and understand the importance of ur child first. I hope this helps. I know it helped me. :)

Mary Ann - posted on 07/08/2012

57

96

10

Hey moms!! I feel the same way. The friends I had in highschool I hardly ever talk to anymore and the one good friend I do talk to she lives 3000 miles away. She lives on the west coast now and Im still here on the east!! I do have a few "friends" that I talk to that have kids but it is so hard to meet up with them because of the way they work and me being a SAHM. Any body that wants to add me on facebook is more than WELCOME...Mary Ann Bragg. I would love to get to know more moms that feel the same way I do!!

Amber - posted on 07/07/2012

48

15

9

lol (to the ladies that have been in the same boat as me) Its not easy and I've been there. It stinks, but thats why you surround yourself with people in the same postion as you. Find a playgroup in your area (even on here asking around) Some of my best friends, I have meet through this site. Is your child old enough for school? I know your at home with him...but I just wanted to make because sometimes that interaction helping. And if you are relgious, I have found the church is a great place to meet people and your child get to interact with other children. Where are you located? Maybe some woman here are close to you

Krystal - posted on 07/03/2012

3

4

0

Hey for all you who would like to at least have someone to talk to on fb you can always add me, Krystal Carmichael. Until we can get together.

Ashleigh - posted on 07/02/2012

24

0

4

i wish I was a stay at home mom. With me being a full time working parent with an 11 month old son I feel like I am so isolated from the world. I have nobody I can relate to. With me being 20 years old, moms do not invite me and my son over for play dates. We got invited to one once but it was during the day whilst I was working so I could't attend. Since then nobody has invited us anywhere. So lonely.

Chantal - posted on 07/01/2012

21

11

0

Hey, I feel the same, I just came back from being in BC for a couple years and when I came back people changed, and moved on. Ive been going to a drop in center, and parks for my 2 yr old to play, but everyone basically keeps to themselves, they have there own clicks...how do you make friends when your not in school, or working just a stay at home mom? I wish we all lived in the same area lol then all us loners could get together! haha

LaShawnda - posted on 07/01/2012

2

4

0

To those of you with 3 and up kids signing your kids up for sports its a good Way for both of you to meet friends and the friends you will meet will more than likely have a child on the team and you can set up play dates and get to know each other then plan to go out on a girls day out at a later time but staying in the house is not the way to go about the situation I'm 25 and a single mom I don't have too many friends but my hair stylist is one of my best friends and we pretty much make Saturdays our day to do whatever kid freUKe so get up n get ou

Donaji - posted on 06/30/2012

2

5

0

if any moms want to get together one day we can im in!

(my old account merged with my facebook)

Krystal - posted on 06/30/2012

3

4

0

I feel the same way, I have a 3yr old, and no one to really to talk or hang out with, I think Melissa has a good idea we should get together one day.

Tiffany - posted on 06/30/2012

15

18

0

I think so many moms end up in the same boat when we decide to settled down and start a family it is hard i have true friend and she has a daughter bnut dont see her much since she works and im a full time stay home, i baby sit and i have my mom but it does get lonely. maybe you could try finding mommy froups for you and your son to attend and can find friends that way

Trish - posted on 06/30/2012

3

15

0

I was and still am to an extent in this boat to, look on facebook for mummy groups in your area there are usually loads. I've also posted a message on the meet a mum bord on netmums its been great i really recoment joining it. Where are you all from?

Trish - posted on 06/30/2012

3

15

0

I was and still am to an extent in this boat to, look on facebook for mummy groups in your area there are usually loads. I've also posted a message on the meet a mum bord on netmums its been great i really recoment joining it. Where are you all from?

Donaji - posted on 06/28/2012

3

0

0

@kayla Exactly all my old friends just want to party and drink and I have to take care of my son

@angelica I feel the same about the facebook. It's sucks not having my phone getting slammed with text like I use to. Now I just get text from family and my sons father/bf occasionally

Kayla - posted on 06/28/2012

1

0

0

omg im so in the same position. after i had my daughter it was like they were dropping like flies. i honestlly dont know what to do myself :( its hard for me to find friends because it seems like everyone around me is having fun and just starting their lives.

Angelica - posted on 06/28/2012

7

4

1

I would like to know what to do too! I am in the exact same boat sahm to my 3 year old son.I am to the point where I would be happy just to have some facebook friends to talk too.

Join Circle of Moms

Sign up for Circle of Moms and be a part of this community! Membership is just one click away.

Join Circle of Moms