Anyone prolife? I need help before its too late!!!

Barbara - posted on 06/01/2009 ( 85 moms have responded )

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I need help! A friend of mine is driving me CRAZY!! Last night at her birthday party she pulled me aside for advice about her situation...It turns out one of her other bestfriends is pregnant. She is really into the whole partying scene and does ALL kinds of drugs and drinks alot! She told my friend "yeah we didn't use protection at all, and I was gonna get the morning after pill but didn't" And she doesn't have a relationship with the guys at all. The guy told her "if you make the right decision Ill pay for it all, if you make the wrong decision, Ill make your life miserable!" SERIOUSLY!?!? I don't know what to do, because my friend and I are TOTALLY PROLIFE!!!!!!!! And she told her friend that no matter what she decided she would be there. And so last night when she told me, she started crying because her friend chose abortion, and wants MY friend to go with her TODAY!!! What do I do? How can my friend go with her and be her NUMBER 1 support, when she doesn't agree with her decision? I think she needs to talk to her mom about it...her mom was raped and still decided to go through with it. So I just keep telling my friend that she needs to help Her friend realize, she wouldnt be here if her mom had made the same decision shes about to make. It's HER FAULT, she knew it could have happened but didnt seem to care much. On the flip side...should she really have this baby? shes been pregnant for a little over a month now and she's been doing ecstacy and smoking weed and tripping on mushrooms, the baby will have problems. My friend discussed adoption and she said "but ill get too attached and not want to give the baby up" So im like thinking to myself "HELLO! You are SOOOO selfish that you would rather kill your baby than deal with your pain when giving it up to someone who DESPERATELY wants a child to love and raise??? Help Me people! I dont know what to tell me friend. Either way, it seems like a lose lose situation...................

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[deleted account]

Quoting Holly:

I think everyone's already said what I was thinkig and I couldn;t phrase it any better. But I'd like to say that when it comes to abortion, Obama passed a law that when an aborted baby makes it and is "born", the child is placed on a cold steel table in a dark room somewhere in the hospital and left to just die. This has happened many many times right here in America. There were some cases where the baby took 8 hours to finally die. Crying for help on a cold table and ignored by nurses.
Maybe that will change her mind.



I know of someone who went through this as well. She was a big drug user and took no prenatal classes. Her child was born without kidneys and technically braindead. Still the babies natural breathing/heartbeat kicked in and it took 5 hours to proclaim the child deceased.



 



I am prochoice in some extreme cases.



Rape, you didn't make that choice and lets be honest there aren't that many women who could carry their rapists baby to term for it to be adopted and not go completely nuts. I know there are some strong women out there, but I'm not sure I could.



DEFINATE life threat to Mother EI pregnancy in the tubes (eptopic I think it's called).



DEFINATE if child even made it to term there would be no hope for it to live EI Severe spinal malformation, missing vital organs.



I DO NOT agree with Whoops the condom broke! ESPECIALLY AGAINST Eh F'ck the condom! When you make a choice to have sex you take the risk of being pregnant THE END! I don't care if you have to raise your kid alone because the Father is a deadbeat loser you banged in a bar! There are lots of single parents!



I also agree with the ultrasound before letting someone consent to an abortion. I LOVED my little Twinkle Bean when I first saw him at 3 months! Just a little bean with a twinkle of a hearbeat. My Husband and I sat and watched the 20 second loop for a 1/2 hour in the emergency room when they checked me for severe cramping and didn't notice a second passed.



If you do decide after ending up pregnant and seeing that to get an abortion I think it's tube tying time! One WHOOPS then you're cut off. It sickens me to think of my tax dollars paying to correct some irresponsible little tramps (not everyone who ends up pregnant by mistake is a tramp but we all know someone who knows the abortion clinic staff on a first name basis!) mistakes over and over and over again!



If you later in life get married and stable they can reverse the tube tying on your dime OR you can adopt a child who someone took responsibility for to term!

Christa - posted on 06/04/2009

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This might be too late, but I would tell her all the facts. And try to get her to see that it is murder. Would you help her murder someone who is out of the womb? NO! You wouldn't go with her to support her. To me its the same thing. I agree with others the choice ended when she had sex. She needs to change her life and take care of the baby inside of her. Regardless of the pregnancy that needs to happen. Support her that way, help her get off this destructive path. You do want to be there for her in that respect, let her know you will be with her every step of the way with the pregnancy. And try and urge her to talk to her mom (frankly if it was me I would tell her mother myself), who better to help her make the right decision. I do hope she didn't go through with it. If she did it's really time to help her change her life.

Lindsay - posted on 06/01/2009

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I agree with Jamie! Being a good friend doesn't always mean you have to go along with what they want. Get everything out in the open and go from there. Her mom needs to know.

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[deleted account]

Quoting Guggie:



Quoting Chelsea:

To the person who said there is never a medical reason for an abortion a pregnancy in the falopion tubes (Eptopic) will grow until
A) the pregnancy is lost through miscarriage.
B) the Falopion tube ruptures causing the Mother to bleed out and die taking the baby with her.






False argument. That is not considered an abortion unless the practictioner directly kills the pre-born human and then removes the body.






 






Science is moving forwards anyways and doctors are trying to successfully remove the pre-born human from the fallopian tubes to the womb so that he or she can continue to grow.






Some people consider Plan B and abortion because it prevents egg and sperm from meeting. Most consider terminating a pregnancy in any way shape or form at any time is an abortion. I'm not talking about the true definition because most people disagree with it anyways.



Even if the science and medical advancements did reach that point to successfully move a fetus (which I hope they do) you know just how specialized that would be? There would be a handful of doctors able to do the procdure. In cases where healthcare isn't paid for it would cost an arm and a leg to get it done. So much that the majority of people unless extravagently wealthy couldn't afford it.



Places healthcare would cover it you would still have the handful of doctors and it wouldn't cover travel and accomidations when you went to see them. Plus there would be a HUGE waiting list just like very other covered healthcare service and chances are most people wouldn't get to see the specialist in time.



So yes hopefully there is a option C soon but the chances of it being realistically affordable or attainable for the majority of people in this world is unfortunately slim to none.

[deleted account]

Quoting Guggie:



Quoting Chelsea:

To the person who said there is never a medical reason for an abortion a pregnancy in the falopion tubes (Eptopic) will grow until
A) the pregnancy is lost through miscarriage.
B) the Falopion tube ruptures causing the Mother to bleed out and die taking the baby with her.






False argument. That is not considered an abortion unless the practictioner directly kills the pre-born human and then removes the body.






 






Science is moving forwards anyways and doctors are trying to successfully remove the pre-born human from the fallopian tubes to the womb so that he or she can continue to grow.






Some people consider Plan B and abortion because it prevents egg and sperm from meeting. Most consider terminating a pregnancy in any way shape or form at any time is an abortion. I'm not talking about the true definition because most people disagree with it anyways.



Even if the science and medical advancements did reach that point to successfully move a fetus (which I hope they do) you know just how specialized that would be? There would be a handful of doctors able to do the procdure. In cases where healthcare isn't paid for it would cost an arm and a leg to get it done. So much that the majority of people unless extravagently wealthy couldn't afford it.



Places healthcare would cover it you would still have the handful of doctors and it wouldn't cover travel and accomidations when you went to see them. Plus there would be a HUGE waiting list just like very other covered healthcare service and chances are most people wouldn't get to see the specialist in time.



So yes hopefully there is a option C soon but the chances of it being realistically affordable or attainable for the majority of people in this world is unfortunately slim to none.

[deleted account]

I'm glad she has decided to reconsider her decision and good on the other guy for stepping up to the plate! I really hope the baby is his not that other losers who told her to abort! Even if things don't work out between them she will still have support and her child will have a Daddy! People make snap decisions in fear and desperation sometimes. Perhaps now she'll discuss the matter with her Mother as well for support.

Becca - posted on 06/06/2009

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If she's on drugs, there's a high possibility the baby won't make it, and if it does, it could be vegetative. Even tho I am PROLIFE, I think that abortion would be the best option FOR THE CHILD. Even in the 0.0000000001% chance the baby turns out without problems, druggies make terrible parents. I think however that your friend should tell her there is no way in hell she will go with her to the clinic. All she has to say is "it goes very strongly against my personal beliefs and makes me very uncomfortable, and I hope you're a good enough friend to understand that, just like I'm a good enough friend to not ridicule you for making a decision that goes against what I believe."

Charlie - posted on 06/05/2009

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my friend told her "look at my son...how could I have killed him? look what I have now! It was scary at first but look at him!! just look at him!"

WOW for a girl going through so much THAT is a massive guilt trip to lay on her !

Katie - posted on 06/05/2009

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Basically what I see it coming down to is this: If she has the baby, it will probably have issues or die because of the lifestyle she is living now and will probably continue to live for the duration of her pregnancy. After she has the baby it will most likely continue to suffer, since it's a good chance she won't want to have to give up said lifestyle to take care of it. She could give it up for adoption but then it goes back to the physical and mental damage she will have caused before it's born. Or she could have the abortion, saving the child from ever having to suffer and have what would probably be a very difficult life. I'm pro choice, but in saying that must also add that for me abortion would never be an option. Of course I got out of my partying days long before deciding to become a mother.



As far as your friend is concerned it's up to her if she wants to be a part of it or not. Being pro life or not she needs to realize that she can't make the girls decision for her, and decide how close of a friend she is to that person and if it's worth forgoing her own morals to be there for her.

Jaime - posted on 06/05/2009

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Quoting Stephanie:

She needs to grow up. I am pro-life, I believe the 'choice' ends when you have sex without protection, the baby didn't get a choice to be concieved. Adoption is ALWAYS an option, for some women, getting pregnant causes them to grow up and change.

My advice, pray for her to make the right choice. Your friend doesnt have to go with someone who is making a decision that goes against her morals.



"pray for her to make the right choice"???... how do you get to decide what is the right choice for this girl?  You don't live her life and you are not going to be there when the baby is born, so as nice as it might feel for you to be 'pro-life', the right choice for you might not be the right choice for someone else.  The choice doesn't stop when you have sex...choices don't end, they are continuous and individual. 



 Also, not supporting a friend because she has decided to do something that is against your morals is just silly...certainly you have the choice as to whether or not you want to remain friends, but if you choose to remain friends with someone that goes against your morals, doesn't it make you a bit selfish to insist that you friend always match your moral code in order to be worthy of your support?



Perhaps this situation will help this girl to 'grow up' and she will think twice before deciding to have unprotected sex in future encounters.  Abortion is not an easy decision to make for anyone and the emotional consequences will likely be with this girl for many years after, but people make bad decisions all the time in their lives...the only thing that gets them through is to know that one day they will be able to forgive themselves and move forward at the better decisions that have been made as a result of something in their past.  No one is perfect.

Jaime - posted on 06/05/2009

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Quoting Stephanie:

She needs to grow up. I am pro-life, I believe the 'choice' ends when you have sex without protection, the baby didn't get a choice to be concieved. Adoption is ALWAYS an option, for some women, getting pregnant causes them to grow up and change.

My advice, pray for her to make the right choice. Your friend doesnt have to go with someone who is making a decision that goes against her morals.



"pray for her to make the right choice"???... how do you get to decide what is the right choice for this girl?  You don't live her life and you are not going to be there when the baby is born, so as nice as it might feel for you to be 'pro-life', the right choice for you might not be the right choice for someone else.  The choice doesn't stop when you have sex...choices don't end, they are continuous and individual. 



 Also, not supporting a friend because she has decided to do something that is against your morals is just silly...certainly you have the choice as to whether or not you want to remain friends, but if you choose to remain friends with someone that goes against your morals, doesn't it make you a bit selfish to insist that you friend always match your moral code in order to be worthy of your support?



Perhaps this situation will help this girl to 'grow up' and she will think twice before deciding to have unprotected sex in future encounters.  Abortion is not an easy decision to make for anyone and the emotional consequences will likely be with this girl for many years after, but people make bad decisions all the time in their lives...the only thing that gets them through is to know that one day they will be able to forgive themselves and move forward at the better decisions that have been made as a result of something in their past.  No one is perfect.

Barbara - posted on 06/05/2009

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she does realize that it's no longer about her...She doesnt want to give the baby up for adoption, SHE wants to be the one to give the child the life it deserves...I think with either guy or alone, shell be a great mom and trust me, my friend and I did give her a wake up call...when we were with her and our kids, my friend told her "look at my son...how could I have killed him? look what I have now! It was scary at first but look at him!! just look at him!" and it kinda kicked in...plus shes a bit over the initial shock so shes starting to get more excited about the baby. We gave her a load of pregnancy magazines and books and shes becoming interested in whats going on. I know with some hard work and support it WILL make her GROW UP QUICKLY and shell realize that shes made some bad choices but it's only really a mistake if she refuses to fix it right?

Maribel - posted on 06/05/2009

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She needs to realize that this is no longer her she needs to think about. There is a child in her, that another family can take of and hive them the life the baby deserves. She should have and be intimidated by the a***hole threats. He is a sad excuse of a father like she is a irresponsible mother..who needs a wake up call from her friend if she is truly her best friend

Charlie - posted on 06/05/2009

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thats great everyone is stepping up to the plate and taking responsibility , and shes stop the drugs , i hope everything goes well for your friend and her baby , this is a fantastic opportunity for her , having kids makes you grow up very quickly ! all the best to them !

Christa - posted on 06/05/2009

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That's fantastic!!! Even though you don't know her that well, continue to support her and help her get through this. It will be hard no matter what happens, she needs good friends. Maybe you should suggest her getting into a drug support group to help her really quit that lifestyle. She may not see it now, but that baby might have been a blessing in disguise to help her get back on the right path. :-)

Christa - posted on 06/05/2009

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That's fantastic!!! Even though you don't know her that well, continue to support her and help her get through this. It will be hard no matter what happens, she needs good friends. Maybe you should suggest her getting into a drug support group to help her really quit that lifestyle. She may not see it now, but that baby might have been a blessing in disguise to help her get back on the right path. :-)

Barbara - posted on 06/05/2009

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I just wanted to post and let you all know what's going on with this situation now...Soooo, my friend took her friend yesterday to the clinic, they said it was AWFUL!, There were so many people there protesting (some even had their TODDLERS screaming "baby killers" to my friends!!! Anyways they had to have someone escort them from the car inside, and when they got inside they did an ultrasound. Come to find out she is FURTHER than she though...meaning now, there is a possibility it is another guys kid.....................OH MY GOSH!! A lot more DRAMA just got added to this situation. Anyways so she called the other guy and told him, and he's like "DONT GET AN ABORTION!! if thats my kid I want to raise it with you, we can make things work, you can come live with me..." So she asks well what if in the end it turns out its not yours? then what? And he didnt really have an answer for her. They can do paternity testing while she's pregnant but it's dangerous for the baby. However she did STOP USING THE DRUGS! I'm glad that now she at least is taking into consideration "im pregnant, i have a baby growing inside me" and she is now trying to do what is best for that baby...not just what's best for her now. So, she was thinking about trying to patch up her relationship with this other guy and if in the end it's not his they'll give it up for adoption. Who knows though...maybe today when she tells the guy she originally thought was the dad, he might have a change of heart...he might think to himself "oh sh*t im gonna be a dad, I couldnt scare her into taking the easy way out and now im gonna have to step up" I don't know either of the guys and I barely know this girl honestly...but I do think she is making a selfless decision now and she wants to give that baby the best life she can. My friend and I both told her, even if in the end it's not the dad she wants it to be, and if the other guy doesnt get his act together, than she CAN do it alone, and she WILL have support! Anyways, Ill keep you all informed.

Guggie - posted on 06/05/2009

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Quoting Chelsea:

To the person who said there is never a medical reason for an abortion a pregnancy in the falopion tubes (Eptopic) will grow until
A) the pregnancy is lost through miscarriage.
B) the Falopion tube ruptures causing the Mother to bleed out and die taking the baby with her.



False argument. That is not considered an abortion unless the practictioner directly kills the pre-born human and then removes the body.



 



Science is moving forwards anyways and doctors are trying to successfully remove the pre-born human from the fallopian tubes to the womb so that he or she can continue to grow.

Gracie - posted on 06/05/2009

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well this is all alot to read!

lots of you are prolife, as i am myself, but once again it is so hard to sit back and let someone abuse a baby.

really, people should think about the baby.

the mother of the baby has clearly forgotten about it.

i think she is in a state of despair. and needs her friends and needs advice from every corner.

this is a decision that will affect the rest of her life. she needs to know that abortion isn't a 'quick fix', nor a means of contraception.

she can suffer for a long time after, emotionally, spiritually, physically and mentally.

i think the best thing to do would be inform her the best you can.

in the end, the child in her womb is her baby and it will be her final choice.

best of luck.

[deleted account]

To the person who said there is never a medical reason for an abortion a pregnancy in the falopion tubes (Eptopic) will grow until

A) the pregnancy is lost through miscarriage.

B) the Falopion tube ruptures causing the Mother to bleed out and die taking the baby with her.

Charlie - posted on 06/04/2009

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Quoting Christa:

That's ridiculous, of course not. Like I said she needs help to straighten out her life. I sure as hell don't think that's a reason to kill the child. Sadly, there are babies born addicted to drugs all the time and they turn out fine and live great lives.


  im just saying there is a high chance that she will miscarrige if she continues to take drugs , and drink , in that case isnt she only putting the baby through a prolonged torturous death anyway ? That is IF she continues with the drug and alcohol abuse .

Charlie - posted on 06/04/2009

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Quoting Guggie:



Quoting Clare-maree:




Quoting Loureen:

a good friend supports and dosent judge . thats what real friends are for , in the end its her decision i just hope she has some good people around to help her when shes feeling down . its a hard thing to decide but i believe its sometimes for the best . she dosent sound fit to be a mother yet and the baby is more than certainly already taken a large beating from all the drugs and alcohol i wouldnt wish any child a life like that .








I agree totally!!








And on another note, those of you that are prolife, I respect you for standing up for your beliefs and encouraging mothers to step up and take responsibility for their actions, but there are times when there is no choice.








I had to have an abortion for medical reasons.... If i didn't, I wouldn't be here. My kids wouldn't have a mother and my husband wouldn't have a wife. I think about the ''what ifs?''  all the time, but the fact is I had to do the best thing for my children. So next time you say ''You would never understand it or condone it, please take a second to think of the times when it was the right thing to do.''









The Alan Guttmacher institute (the research arm for Planned Parenthood) released a statement confirming that abortion is never medically necessary. I hope you fired your OB and found a new doctor.





maybe you didnt read her post properly she would have died if she had the child , leaving a motherless child and a husband ?

Charlie - posted on 06/04/2009

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Quoting Guggie:



Quoting Clare-maree:




Quoting Loureen:

a good friend supports and dosent judge . thats what real friends are for , in the end its her decision i just hope she has some good people around to help her when shes feeling down . its a hard thing to decide but i believe its sometimes for the best . she dosent sound fit to be a mother yet and the baby is more than certainly already taken a large beating from all the drugs and alcohol i wouldnt wish any child a life like that .








I agree totally!!








And on another note, those of you that are prolife, I respect you for standing up for your beliefs and encouraging mothers to step up and take responsibility for their actions, but there are times when there is no choice.








I had to have an abortion for medical reasons.... If i didn't, I wouldn't be here. My kids wouldn't have a mother and my husband wouldn't have a wife. I think about the ''what ifs?''  all the time, but the fact is I had to do the best thing for my children. So next time you say ''You would never understand it or condone it, please take a second to think of the times when it was the right thing to do.''









The Alan Guttmacher institute (the research arm for Planned Parenthood) released a statement confirming that abortion is never medically necessary. I hope you fired your OB and found a new doctor.





maybe you didnt read her post properly she would have died if she had the child , leaving a motherless child and a husband ?

Guggie - posted on 06/04/2009

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Quoting Clare-maree:



Quoting Loureen:

a good friend supports and dosent judge . thats what real friends are for , in the end its her decision i just hope she has some good people around to help her when shes feeling down . its a hard thing to decide but i believe its sometimes for the best . she dosent sound fit to be a mother yet and the baby is more than certainly already taken a large beating from all the drugs and alcohol i wouldnt wish any child a life like that .






I agree totally!!






And on another note, those of you that are prolife, I respect you for standing up for your beliefs and encouraging mothers to step up and take responsibility for their actions, but there are times when there is no choice.






I had to have an abortion for medical reasons.... If i didn't, I wouldn't be here. My kids wouldn't have a mother and my husband wouldn't have a wife. I think about the ''what ifs?''  all the time, but the fact is I had to do the best thing for my children. So next time you say ''You would never understand it or condone it, please take a second to think of the times when it was the right thing to do.''





The Alan Guttmacher institute (the research arm for Planned Parenthood) released a statement confirming that abortion is never medically necessary. I hope you fired your OB and found a new doctor.

Guggie - posted on 06/04/2009

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Quoting Clare-maree:



Quoting Loureen:

a good friend supports and dosent judge . thats what real friends are for , in the end its her decision i just hope she has some good people around to help her when shes feeling down . its a hard thing to decide but i believe its sometimes for the best . she dosent sound fit to be a mother yet and the baby is more than certainly already taken a large beating from all the drugs and alcohol i wouldnt wish any child a life like that .






I agree totally!!






And on another note, those of you that are prolife, I respect you for standing up for your beliefs and encouraging mothers to step up and take responsibility for their actions, but there are times when there is no choice.






I had to have an abortion for medical reasons.... If i didn't, I wouldn't be here. My kids wouldn't have a mother and my husband wouldn't have a wife. I think about the ''what ifs?''  all the time, but the fact is I had to do the best thing for my children. So next time you say ''You would never understand it or condone it, please take a second to think of the times when it was the right thing to do.''





The Alan Guttmacher institute (the research arm for Planned Parenthood) released a statement confirming that abortion is never medically necessary. I hope you fired your OB and found a new doctor.

Christa - posted on 06/04/2009

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That's ridiculous, of course not. Like I said she needs help to straighten out her life. I sure as hell don't think that's a reason to kill the child. Sadly, there are babies born addicted to drugs all the time and they turn out fine and live great lives.

Charlie - posted on 06/04/2009

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Quoting Christa:



Quoting Jessica:

Wow...all I can say from reading 95% of these posts are most of you are very judgmental and cruel. You have not walked a mile in this girls shoes or are you able to be in her head and know what turmoil she is going thru. Deciding to have an aboration is not easy choice for ANYONE to make regardless of their situation. If you are a friend you will support her no matter what her decision as she needs to do what is best for her, her body, and her life. And in regards to all of you who are saying "tell her mom what is going on" unless this girl is under the age of 18 you have NO right what so ever to go to her mother and tell her mother. As long as she is over the age 18 she has the right to do what she feels is best for her.





 






You are entitled to your opinion, but I don't think it's judgmental to not support the murdering of a child.  And I don't care what age she is if I was concerned about my friend I would not hesitate to go to her parents.  I didn't realize that once you turned 18 you magically know all the answers.





do  you support slowly torturing a child through drug and alcohol abuse ?

Christa - posted on 06/04/2009

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Quoting Jessica:

Wow...all I can say from reading 95% of these posts are most of you are very judgmental and cruel. You have not walked a mile in this girls shoes or are you able to be in her head and know what turmoil she is going thru. Deciding to have an aboration is not easy choice for ANYONE to make regardless of their situation. If you are a friend you will support her no matter what her decision as she needs to do what is best for her, her body, and her life. And in regards to all of you who are saying "tell her mom what is going on" unless this girl is under the age of 18 you have NO right what so ever to go to her mother and tell her mother. As long as she is over the age 18 she has the right to do what she feels is best for her.


 



You are entitled to your opinion, but I don't think it's judgmental to not support the murdering of a child.  And I don't care what age she is if I was concerned about my friend I would not hesitate to go to her parents.  I didn't realize that once you turned 18 you magically know all the answers.

Jessica - posted on 06/04/2009

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Wow...all I can say from reading 95% of these posts are most of you are very judgmental and cruel. You have not walked a mile in this girls shoes or are you able to be in her head and know what turmoil she is going thru. Deciding to have an aboration is not easy choice for ANYONE to make regardless of their situation. If you are a friend you will support her no matter what her decision as she needs to do what is best for her, her body, and her life. And in regards to all of you who are saying "tell her mom what is going on" unless this girl is under the age of 18 you have NO right what so ever to go to her mother and tell her mother. As long as she is over the age 18 she has the right to do what she feels is best for her.

Jamie - posted on 06/04/2009

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those pics made me cry!!! omg, they are so disturbing! especially of the abortions done on the older babies! Did you guys know that partial birth abortion is legal in Canada!

Calli - posted on 06/04/2009

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Quoting Heather:

First of all it is your friends choice... NOT EVERYONE is made to be parents esecially at a young age... you can be prolife but there is a lot of responsibilties that follow that. and until you are put into the situation that she is you should preach about what you think is right or wrong. it is her life and her body and if your friend was really her best friend then she would keep her mouth shut and be there to support her friend in that difficult time. she is going to be very upset for a while but not as emotional drained and upset for missing out on her youth. try thinking about the situation and what you would do.... bc you GIVE UP EVERYTHING in your life when you become a young mother... and guys don't think it is all that cute either once you have kids young....


http://www.abortionno.org/Resources/pict...



 



I couldn't find the video of an actual abortion being performed but these photos should be enough to persuade you. Still think it's "her body"???? It's not!!! The body being ripped limb from limb is the BABY! The BODY BEING SCRAPED OUT is THE BABY! A TINY HUMAN BEING!!! I've been in her situation, and I'd never committ MURDER apparantely you would!

Calli - posted on 06/04/2009

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i hope someone showed her what an abortion IS and how barbaric and cruel it is. It's not a "medical procedure" it's straight up mutilation! If you've ever seen an abortion performed and you don't agree you have no heart. If you haven't seen one and choose to stay ignorant to what it does to someone then I'll pray for you!

Sarah - posted on 06/04/2009

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How is it that not supporting abortion is judging others? You are killing an INNOCENT human being! I understand wanting to support someone and "their decision" to abort a child, for the moms sake, but like so many others have said... THE BABY DOESN"T HAVE A SAY!!!! What about them?? Is it their fault the mom can't step up and the dad is a acting like a child? They both need to step up and take responsibility for their actions, as they ARE the ones who decided to cross the line and have sex. People dont understand how desctructive it is to have children outside of marriage. No one is protected outside of marriage. Like Crystal said, she is not only putting her child at risk, but also herself, not to mention the risks she is taking if she decides to get an abortion. There HAS to be boundaries set by law that protects those who cannot protect themeselves. It has nothing to do with "judging" others and their choice to either abort or not. You have to admit, there are some VERY selfish people out there who only care about themselves and not the child they would prefer to kill. It is still murder, no matter how much you sugar-coat it.

Crystal - posted on 06/04/2009

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I think she should have the baby and give it up for adopition and then maybe she will realize that life isn't all about partying its about taking responsibility for your actions and going and having an abortion is not the way to go. She needs to give that baby to a family who will care for it and she needs to stop doing the drugs because she is putting no only the baby at risk but herself at risk of serious problems in the near future.

Heather - posted on 06/04/2009

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First of all it is your friends choice... NOT EVERYONE is made to be parents esecially at a young age... you can be prolife but there is a lot of responsibilties that follow that. and until you are put into the situation that she is you should preach about what you think is right or wrong. it is her life and her body and if your friend was really her best friend then she would keep her mouth shut and be there to support her friend in that difficult time. she is going to be very upset for a while but not as emotional drained and upset for missing out on her youth. try thinking about the situation and what you would do.... bc you GIVE UP EVERYTHING in your life when you become a young mother... and guys don't think it is all that cute either once you have kids young....

Courtney - posted on 06/03/2009

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I am prolife as well, but in Jan. I helped a friend through the exact same thing. She is in a relationship with a guy that doesn't take care of the son they have together, nor his son from a previous relationship! I buy more diapers for her little boy than he does!! She was on the pill and STILL got pregnant!! (She got pregnant off the shot with her son) She is very much pro life, but they were on the verge of breaking up and she can bearly take care of herself and her son, let alone another child! So, she went to have it done, but she has NO family in the area, so she asked me; my hubby felt as you do...how could I go with her? But my reasons for being prolife are religious, with that being said, religiously HE wants you to be good to your neighbor...and "do unto others as you would have them do unto you". Though I would never get an abortion, I felt that someone should have been there for her. So, I took the responisbility on myself. While she was in the room, I prayed for her...and that was all I could do. Just as you are pro-life, all you can do is pray for those who think differently...just because they are different/think different doesn't mean they are not HIS children too. HE forgives all sinners...sorry if this came out too religious, but many people choose religion as their basis for prolife and that was the only way I could explain my opinion.

Kris - posted on 06/03/2009

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this girl does sound a little selfish for getting pregnant but in some ways having the abortion could be a good thing, like you said if she does go through with keeping the baby this poor lilttle baby could end up with a drug addiction and serious other problems. it doesnt sound like she would stop doing the drugs. im againist abortion as well but in some cases some people are just not in the right state if mind to have a baby. and your friend should just say sorry i cant go with you but ill be right out side ready and waiting to help afterwards if she has the abortion.

[deleted account]

sounds like this female ought to be as far away from children as possible. It is totally her choice, and what you and her other friend think is irrelevent, to be frank. This girl is in such a situation because of her choices and she needs to decide how to deal with it on her own. that's part of being an adult. I understand that what she's focused on is different to what you and the other girl feel is right, but again... it's not your choice. It sucks, but in the end it seems like the best thing for both baby and mom if baby doesnt happen. I'd rather she abort than have the child...and then there is another unwanted, unloved child on the earth that is miserable and most likely abused. That is not a life.

Tina - posted on 06/03/2009

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oh not good, i dont believe in abortions myself, i was 16 when i feel pregant and 17 when i have my child, and yes decided to keep him, he is now nearly 20 years old, but if this girl is taking these drugs and drinking so much then she could end up loosing the baby anyway, and maybe she feels that she couldnt cope with it, how old is she, well done to her mum, but she is not her mum though. it is up to her in the end and really yes she should speak to her own mother, no matter the out come of what her mum may say. and maybe if she still goes through with it maybe it will be her mum to go with her and your friend may not have too. but you both should stand by her what ever she decides, and next time she should make sure she is protected (her or him), me myself could not go through a pregance and give my child away and that is why i have all my children, good luck

Krysten - posted on 06/03/2009

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I dont always fully agree with abortion.. I almost made the choice.. but at the same time.. if the time is very wrong and it sounds like it is for this girl.. then she should get an abortion.. especially when she has someone who will pay for it all... Some people are not meant to have kids and this girl sounds like one of them.. well not meant to have kids now at least.. and if she winds up getting pregnant again, then thats her fault and she should deal with it then and make the guy pay child support.. Adoption is always a good choice too.. Have this girl watch the movie JUNO.. Anywho.. hope everything goes well..

Clare-maree - posted on 06/03/2009

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Quoting Loureen:

a good friend supports and dosent judge . thats what real friends are for , in the end its her decision i just hope she has some good people around to help her when shes feeling down . its a hard thing to decide but i believe its sometimes for the best . she dosent sound fit to be a mother yet and the baby is more than certainly already taken a large beating from all the drugs and alcohol i wouldnt wish any child a life like that .



I agree totally!!



And on another note, those of you that are prolife, I respect you for standing up for your beliefs and encouraging mothers to step up and take responsibility for their actions, but there are times when there is no choice.



I had to have an abortion for medical reasons.... If i didn't, I wouldn't be here. My kids wouldn't have a mother and my husband wouldn't have a wife. I think about the ''what ifs?''  all the time, but the fact is I had to do the best thing for my children. So next time you say ''You would never understand it or condone it, please take a second to think of the times when it was the right thing to do.''

Gretchen - posted on 06/03/2009

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you know i have to add the baby and mother are tested for drugs when the baby is born and if it comes up positive they will take her baby away, i know they do it here i don't know about other places. . .i had to sign a consent in the middle of labour letting them test us. . .so you can tell her that if she does decide to keep it

Jenee - posted on 06/03/2009

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I am pro-choice but only under certain cases, while i would never do the unthinkable some people still do it. It is not for us to judge. As for your friend, it is her choice to go along with her. She needs to be clear on the fact that she doesn't agree with this girls decision she will be there to support her. If this girl is doing all the drugs you say she is doing then this baby WILL come out with major problems and for what you have said I doubt she will be able to handle this sort of thing. While it is very selfish of her to say she wouldn't want to stop doing all the drugs and just have the baby out right and give it up, you have to understand that we all have free will and it is HER choice. You can't look down on her for it. One day she will have to answer for what she did and it will be all on her, not you or your friend. But honestly if she is doing all these things to begin with the baby is not going to make it full term anyways. You seem like a smart girl and I can tell you this and I am not meaning to sound B*tchy when I say it, just stay out of it if you don't feel right about the whole thing.

Gretchen - posted on 06/03/2009

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you know this is a really ugly debate to have. . .a lot of you are not going to agree with me but I am a mother of choice (meaning i am a mother and pro choice) depending on the situation abortion should be considered an option. .now with her it was her fault to not use protection and she needs to deal with it, maybe if she has the baby she will change her ways, but maybe not, maybe she is one of those people that need not to reproduce and stay on birth control or use condoms next time!. . .

i don't think women should use abortion as a birth control BUT what if there was a 14 year old girl who was raped on the way home from school or raped by a family member and she got pregnant then i think she should know about ALL the options and let her make the choice i don't think she should have to carry the baby if she didn't want to ( i don't think a baby should be brought into the world that was created by hate BUT THAT IS MY OPINION AND YOU DON"T HAVE TO AGREE!)

my cousin had to have an abortion because her babys brain was developing and there were a lot of heart problems and it was missing limbs (this was from med she was taking for a yeast infection) her mom 15 years ago had to have one because the baby had died and she had no choice. . .

and you know people who have to go through with one it is very very hard and yes it will stay with you forever. . but no matter her views or opinions the friend needs to be a friend and support her 100% no matter what

Jamie - posted on 06/03/2009

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Quoting Holly:

I think everyone's already said what I was thinkig and I couldn;t phrase it any better. But I'd like to say that when it comes to abortion, Obama passed a law that when an aborted baby makes it and is "born", the child is placed on a cold steel table in a dark room somewhere in the hospital and left to just die. This has happened many many times right here in America. There were some cases where the baby took 8 hours to finally die. Crying for help on a cold table and ignored by nurses.
Maybe that will change her mind.


I didn't realize this was going on!!!  I guess I don't know a whole lot about the abortion process, I didn't know a baby could make it through one!  That is soooo sad!  Does anyone know where to get more info on this stuff??

[deleted account]

I am completely prolife!!!!! Somone needs to tell her mom. BEFORE she makes the worst decsion of her life.. that boy can't do anything to her. Her mom will more than likely be understanding, considering that she was kind in the same situation. Please post on here what her final decsion was.

Jamie - posted on 06/03/2009

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The girl needs to really think about what she's doing! She's killing her child! She'll regret it later in life! Especially when she does have children, she'll always wonder about the one she chose to abort!!! It'll be hard to raise a baby, but it's hard for everyone and it's worth it!!!!!!!!!!!! No matter what the situation is, once she gives birth to that baby and they place it on her chest, she'll know she made the right decision!! This is a VERY unfortunate situation, I feel badly for the baby! :*(

Kelly - posted on 06/03/2009

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Quoting Tiffany:

For myself I am absolutely prolife I would never consider it no matter what the circumstances were. Having said that I don't believe I or anyone else is in any position to judge another person. I have been there for my friends who have had abortions. If your friend really is so prolife she cant be supportive she should not go as she will probably make an extremly hard day worse then it already is.



I agree with you.  She shouldn't go if she can't support her. 



 

Tiffany - posted on 06/03/2009

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For myself I am absolutely prolife I would never consider it no matter what the circumstances were. Having said that I don't believe I or anyone else is in any position to judge another person. I have been there for my friends who have had abortions. If your friend really is so prolife she cant be supportive she should not go as she will probably make an extremly hard day worse then it already is.

Andrea - posted on 06/03/2009

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I can't beleive that, it is horriable and just unhamunly to let a child suffer that way... most babies who can survive that long on there own more than likely do very well in a NICU. My daughter was born 2 1/2 months early and had to be intababted because she could brith that well so I think that is shows you how mature the little one is. There is alot of ppl who would love to adopt a child even if it has medical problems like being a preemie baby. While I don't beleive in abortion I know some ppl who have had some and I would say that 90% of them regret what they did. If she does decide to keep the baby there is always ways to keep him/her in her life stuff like open adoptions were she could still be in the child's life. I hope that she makes what is right for her and the child and will pray for her to be able to make choice.

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