Bonding Gone Bad?

Bonitabellachiquita - posted on 02/04/2014 ( 2 moms have responded )

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Hello Moms! My daughter is 3 months old and I have been breastfeeding since she was delivered. Despite all the benefits of this there are some cons. My daughter has become so attached to me she is barely taking to anyone else. Even her father is having a hard time bonding with her. Does anyone have any advice on winging her away from me or how other people can start to bond with her more easily?

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Denikka - posted on 02/07/2014

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At 3 months, your baby doesn't actually see herself as an individual. She's just an extension of you at this point.
Give her time :) She'll go through stages where she'll just want mommy or just want daddy.
But until about 6 months, there is no sense of self, just an extension of mommy. And I'm sure you would be pretty freaked out if your arm just detached itself and wandered off :P

Chet - posted on 02/07/2014

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This is normal. 3 months is early. Give her more like a year to eighteen months. We have four kids. They all played favourites... wanting me to the exclusion of others for their first year of life and dumping me for my husband when they got to be toddlers.

Your baby's dad just needs to be around. She needs to see him with you. He needs to hold her and talk to her when she is content for that to happen. She will warm up in time. Don't push.

To develop normally infants need to bond with someone, and they need that relationship to be stable. As long as a baby learns to bond with one person (usually their mother) the bond with others will come when they are ready. It will eventually grow from what a baby learns in that first bonded relationship.

Don't push your baby away to encourage her to develop a relationship with her father or anyone else. It's better for her to go willingly.

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