Circumcision

Shameron - posted on 05/20/2009 ( 93 moms have responded )

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First, I probably need to start by giving you some information about my situation. I have been married before and have two little girls from that marriage. I am currently engaged to someone else now and a topic came up the other night that concerned me a little bit, only because we both seem to be set on each side of it.

Boy (I lovingly refer to him as boy) and I have discussed having kids. We want to have one together eventually and definitely are not in a place to do it now. The other night, somehow we got on to the conversation of circumcision and I pointed out that I was adamently against it. This actually seemed to surprise boy (he is circumcised) and I found out that he is completely against not getting a child circumcised.

I tried to explain my reasons for not wanting my son (if we were to have one) circumcised. The fact that most of the time they don't use anethsetics and the infant will go into sleep from shock. I pointed out the fact that it's unneeded surgery and is akin to getting your apendix out just because there is a possibility that later in life you could have an apendicitis. This had no effect.

I can't entertain the thought of having a child with him, especially if it does turn out to be a boy if we do not agree on this. Is this were I compromise because millions of children go through this and are fine or is there some other information that I can give him, maybe to open his eyes.

Anyone else go through this? What did you do?

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Claire - posted on 05/21/2009

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All i can say is I'm glad I'm not American!



Put it this way only a small % of American boys are done now, they're in the minority now. Outside of America it's only religious countries (Jewish or Islamic) that get done as a routine thing. America is not the healthiest country in the world, in fact it's far from it! British men don't worry about keeping it clean and they don't pick up loads of diseases or need it cutting off when they're older.



It's an unnecessary cosmetic surgery. There are loads of ways that I don't look like my girls, but I'm not going to put them through surgery to make them look like me.



A form of phimosis runs through my partners family. He was born without an opening foreskin and after attempts to create one for him failed he had to have it all taken off. is son was done a couple of years ago and when I was talking to my partner's mother about his son she told me that her ex-husband had had the same problem. My partner didn't know! He'd never noticed what his father looked like or that his brother looked different to them. Because, lets face it, with or without surgery men look different and men look different to boys.



It seems to me that there are some lazy reasons to mutilate a son:



Hygiene - teach him to wash himself properly

Looks like daddy - teach him that we all look different and that men do look different to boys.

STIs - teach him to use a condom! (and stop reading flawed studies that have been debunked)

Because girl's prefer it - I baulk at the idea of making decisions for my children as newborns based on what a shallow person they're thinking of sleeping with will think! Teach your son that girls (or boys ;-) ) will love him no matter what and if they don't they're not worth it. I have so much more to say on that issue but it really does make me feel sick.



I don't agree that dads should be the one that makes the decision alone either. For a dad to say "no" he has to admit that his parents did something bad to him and no one wants to think that. Decisions should be made be looking into the facts together. When in doubt, DON'T DO IT! Remember, it can come off later but it can never be undone.

Gretchyn - posted on 05/28/2009

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Wow. If it such a huge issue that you can not see ever having kids with him then what other issues are there that you guys don't agree about? My husband and I felt like we would do it and have our son circumcised BUT THEN at the last min after signing the release 3 separate times My hubby took off after the baby in the nursery and yelled for them to stop! It was adorable (and really sexy for him to save my baby from the dreaded cut) and where I think that the son looking or whatever like his dad is such a NON Issue. It was a big deal with him at the time. Now there are so many boys that are not circumcised that its not so bad for a boy. Cut or not cut a boys wiener is much more important to him than to us later in life, and he can always have it done later too. He can't really sew it back on after 20yrs though now can he?

Morag - posted on 05/25/2009

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Lets face it...unless your son's penis drops off, he can make the decision about his own genital mutilation at a later date. Then its his decision and if it all goes hideiously wrong he will only have himself to blame. I wouldn't go lopping off bits of my girls vaginas or popping breast implants, dying their hair, etc... Its not my body nor my place to make those decisions. I understand it may be easier to keep clean (girls are a lot harder to keep clean than boys) but as a parent its part of your job to care for your kids and I wouldn't go sewing up my girls vaginas just to make my life easier!!!, You are meant to keep them clean until they are old enough to look after themselves and make their own decisions about what they want to do with their bodies.

I speak as a mother of a child who legitimately requires cosmetic surgery. My daughter was born with only one breast due to Poland Syndrome as well as other malformities in her chest/arm area. Her breast is vital part of being a woman and how she will preceive herself.. She will be made fun of and she will have sexual issues with boys. Will I just plow ahead and get her an implant when she is older.. No.. its her decision and we will make that decision when she is old enough to make it.
Their bodies are only on loan to us. We are supposed to give it back to them cared for, protected and preferrably in one piece.

And really, if a foreskin didn't serve some purpose, why would men have them in the first place? Your little toe might not seem to serve any purpose but people who loose their little toe report balance problems, so it serves a purpose no matter how small.

The myth that men who are circ. get less STD's has actually caused an increase in infections because men who are circ. erroneously believe that they are protected where the ONLY way to protect yourself is a condom. Not only that, the studies failed to take into account that in Africa most circ. men are muslim and therefore certain sexual activities like homosexuality are frowned upon and less likely committed. These sexual activities carry higher rates of STD infection regardless.

I am not against circ. It serves a purpose. I am only against drastic and painful cosmetic alterations on children and babies without their consent because the parents "think" it makes them look better or makes them easier to care for (not ncluding Circ for medical reasons). Thinking about your kids in terms of your sexual preferences is wrong, and to then lop a bit of their kids body off because of their sexual desires is equally wrong...

Ez - posted on 05/22/2009

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Also, in Australia doctors don't do circumcisions at birth anymore, as it is no longer a standard procedure. In fact, you'll be hard pressed to find a doctor who will do it at all! In my city (of roughly 500,000 people) there is ONE doctor who performs circumcisions, and he actually does them on Sundays so as to not put off his other patients. While I accept it is a personal choice, the simple fact that doctors don't deem it medically necessary, and actually REFUSE to do it, should say something...

Traci - posted on 05/21/2009

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Well, I am THANKFUL I'm an American for a myriad of reasons. That being said, I had it done to my son. Personally, I think its weird otherwise, but to each his own. It is not that big a deal. The baby is only a day old or so, they do a little snip snip. They cry for a second and once they've got their pacifier they stop. My boy didn't even cry about it after that. Think about it, after going through the birth canal, a little snip can't hurt that bad. Even so, I'm sure its a lot better having it done when you are a day old compared to when you are old enough to remember and realize the pain. Get it over with while they're young I say. That being said, I would say it should be up to the dad to decide what his son will have done down there. I've never heard of a guy wishing his parents hadn't done that.

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Emily - posted on 05/28/2009

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Here is a switch, my husband (who was 20 when our first son was born) is NOT circumcised. Myself, having never had a penis :) asked him what to do. I was surprised, but he was absolutely adamant that we get Dane circumcised, so we did.

I'm sure there are horror stories, but my boys cried for maybe five minutes, and really after that, we just kept it covered in vaseline and didn't worry about it. It was no big deal. To each his own, I just thought that my UN-circumcised husband would know more about it than I would, and I had no trouble following his advice. I figured he would know, after all :)

Amanda - posted on 05/28/2009

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Well I have the opposite problem. I have 3 boys that are circumsised (sp?) and my husband and I do not have any children together. He is not circumsised and said if we have a son he won't be either. I'm sorry but don't tell me whether or not my son is not going to get circumsised!



Either way, yes they ALWAYS use local anesthesia for a baby when they perform the surgery. No baby passes out from shock so I don't know where you got your information on that.



A lot of people have their sons cicumsised for various reasons, and there are those that don't get it done. In my family it's not a HOT DEBATE LOL but if I carried a child for 9 months I think I should be able to decide if he gets his penis circumsised or not.



I totally butchered that word. I am sorry. But either way, it's your decision.

Guggie - posted on 05/28/2009

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Quoting Christina:

With regards to insurance companies. Guggie made it sound like most insurance companies won't pay for it and that isn't true (at least where I live). When Mycah was born I specifically asked the doctor about it and she indicated that unless I had medicaid that the insurance would most likely pay for it because it's rare for insurance to deny it. Some medicaid insurances do not cover the procedure and you have to have medical reasoning for it. And even though the medical organizations don't recommend it, they don't recommend not to do it either. American Society of Pediatrics has no recommendation. At least this was the case last year this time when I was looking into see what we would do for Mycah.


 




Actually, that is very outdated advice. The Federal Government through the Centers for Medicare and Medicaid Services has defined elective circumcision (ICD-9-CM V50.2) as medically unnecessary. As such, many insurance policies do not cover or only partially cover neonatal male circumcision. A good piece of advice would be to get a confirmation in writing from your insurance carrier before electing to remove your son's foreskin.



 



Routine, non-therapeutic infant circumcision costs taxpayers up to $70 million annually, according to the American Academy of Pediatrics. Costs are more when payments for complications and extended hospital stays are included. Sixteen states reallocate millions of dollars each year by not funding infant circumcision - Arizona, California, Florida, Idaho, Louisiana, Maine, Minnesota, Mississippi, Missouri, Montana, Nevada, North Carolina, North Dakota, Oregon, Utah, and Washington.





The American Academy of Pediatrics says, "Existing scientific evidence demonstrates potential medical benefits of newborn male circumcision; however, these data are not sufficient to recommend routine neonatal circumcision."





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Furthermore, infant male circumcision (along with infant female circumcision)  is not recommended by any national medical health organization in the world, including the American Academy of Pediatrics, the American Medical Association, the American college of Obstetricians and Gynecologists and the American Cancer Society.

Ally - posted on 05/27/2009

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OMG, I went through the same thing, I have been engaged for 3 years now and finally getting married this summer but I had my son in 2007 and when i was pregnant I had a fight with my fiance over circumcision. I didnt want him to be because i thought it was cruel and unnessecary. My fiance said that it was really important to him that our son be done. We had our tiffs about it but he had a friend in highschool , that had to be circumcised when he was 17 and has never been the same since. So I couldnt change his mind and he said taht this would be the only thing that he would be so strong about and if there was anything that i was strong about that he would support me. In the end we got our son circumcised and it was scary for me, always is for the mum. But he healed quickly and they do freeze them with cream so its not as bad as it seems. If i had another boy, I would do it again. And 3 years ago I was SOOOO AGAINST IT!!!
Hope I helped you hun,
Good Luck
xxx

Laura - posted on 05/27/2009

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I left it up to my husband, because, as I put it, that's a boy part and he's the boy. The final decision ultimately was made by the fact that in Ontario you have to pay for circumcision, and by the time we brought it up with the doctor, our son was 2 months old and he thought we might have to go out of town to a urologist.

Rebekah - posted on 05/27/2009

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You can ask your pediatrician to use some numbing shots if you'd like, they can't tell you no. My son was circumcised at 2 weeks old and I was terrified but he was good as new by the second day with no baby tylenol or anything. It heals VERY fast. However it can be done very easily later in life as well if you want to let your child make the decision for himself!

TeRina - posted on 05/27/2009

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I'm not for it and neither is my bf, but our son will probably have to have one when he gets older according to my doctor...I'm really hoping that won't be the case and it works itself out so he doesn't need one. Because I don't think I get stand my son going through surgery even if he will be a little older I'm really, really not looking forward to it, if it needs to happen!

Christina - posted on 05/27/2009

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With regards to insurance companies. Guggie made it sound like most insurance companies won't pay for it and that isn't true (at least where I live). When Mycah was born I specifically asked the doctor about it and she indicated that unless I had medicaid that the insurance would most likely pay for it because it's rare for insurance to deny it. Some medicaid insurances do not cover the procedure and you have to have medical reasoning for it. And even though the medical organizations don't recommend it, they don't recommend not to do it either. American Society of Pediatrics has no recommendation. At least this was the case last year this time when I was looking into see what we would do for Mycah.

Guggie - posted on 05/27/2009

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To the OP: have you allowed your boyfriend to watch the youtube videos of the procedures? If he argues that anesthetic is used, let him watch the video showing them administer the anesthetic.

Guggie - posted on 05/27/2009

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My husband is mutilated and he is a staunch intactivist. He told me his future sons will not be forcibly mutilated as infants. And I agreed with him. All my brothers are intact so I grew up thinking it was normal. Fortunately, since no medical organisation or insurance company supports it, this routine surgery is trending downwards and no doubt our future sons will be surrounded by many other intact American men later on.

[deleted account]

Veronica - Personally, I do feel that the two practices are comparable. You're right, that some female circumcision is the extreme which you describe, but that's only about 15% of cases. In countries that do that, they also circumcise their boys with broken glass and without anesthetic, but that fact isn't particularly relevant to why I oppose male circumcision on infants. But *women* who do support female circumcision - whether you're talking about just removal of the clitoral hood (like the foreskin) or something more extreme - support the practice because they say it is cleaner, lower rates of STD's, men prefer it, sex is better, should look like mom, its part of the culture, parental choice, etc. For me, the fact that women in circumcising cultures see male and female circ the same was one reason I began to question the practice. Fuambai Ahmadu, for example, is probably the biggest supporter of female circumcision in the US, and has written a lot on the subject:
http://www.thepatrioticvanguard.com/arti...

I don't think having a baby boy (or girl!) circumcised in a hospital is anything like what boys and girls go through in cultures where this is part of initiation rites. But I do think that both situations involve taking a decision away from an individual. They also both remove a sensitive part of the anatomy. For me, its not about if circumcising is good or bad per se, it is about who should make the choice. Hope that makes sense.

Veronica - posted on 05/27/2009

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I just wanted to make a comment between male and female circumcision -- have your own beliefs and whatever about male circumcision -- but you absolutely cannot compare it to a female circ - why? because the one for females is barbaric - they cut off the clitoris - which is a part of the stimulation - and they sew the "hole" (pardon my choice of words) so small - this is so that if the girl fools around, they will know because she will be "open" -- Boys get a piece of skin removed, and it doesn't cause any issues after its done - they still have stimulation, and they aren't painfully torn open!! So, its not really something you can really compare --

[deleted account]



Quoting Claire:

All i can say is I'm glad I'm not American!

Put it this way only a small % of American boys are done now, they're in the minority now. Outside of America it's only religious countries (Jewish or Islamic) that get done as a routine thing. America is not the healthiest country in the world, in fact it's far from it! British men don't worry about keeping it clean and they don't pick up loads of diseases or need it cutting off when they're older.

It's an unnecessary cosmetic surgery. There are loads of ways that I don't look like my girls, but I'm not going to put them through surgery to make them look like me.

A form of phimosis runs through my partners family. He was born without an opening foreskin and after attempts to create one for him failed he had to have it all taken off. is son was done a couple of years ago and when I was talking to my partner's mother about his son she told me that her ex-husband had had the same problem. My partner didn't know! He'd never noticed what his father looked like or that his brother looked different to them. Because, lets face it, with or without surgery men look different and men look different to boys.

It seems to me that there are some lazy reasons to mutilate a son:



 



 



 



Hygiene - teach him to wash himself properly
Looks like daddy - teach him that we all look different and that men do look different to boys.
STIs - teach him to use a condom! (and stop reading flawed studies that have been debunked)
Because girl's prefer it - I baulk at the idea of making decisions for my children as newborns based on what a shallow person they're thinking of sleeping with will think! Teach your son that girls (or boys ;-) ) will love him no matter what and if they don't they're not worth it. I have so much more to say on that issue but it really does make me feel sick.

I don't agree that dads should be the one that makes the decision alone either. For a dad to say "no" he has to admit that his parents did something bad to him and no one wants to think that. Decisions should be made be looking into the facts together. When in doubt, DON'T DO IT! Remember, it can come off later but it can never be undone.



 



 



 



All I can say is I am glad I am an AMERICAN. What does "America not being the healthiest country" have to do with getting your son circumcisied or not????  Why do people like you act like its the worse thing a mother can do to her son. And just how to do know that most American boys don't have it done these days, b/c you read some statistics in Britian or wherever you are from. I don't care either way what others choose for their son's, it's every mothers choice. So don't accuse mothers who choose circumcision that they only do it for cosmetic, or lazy reasonings. If we think it keeps them healthier in the long run or cleaner and easier to take care of  than that is our opinion. I thnk either way little boys make it just fine for the most part.



 



 



 





 

Angelica - posted on 05/27/2009

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MY BABY IS NOT CIRCUMCISED AND I DON'T SEE THE DIFERENCE HIS FATHER IS NOT CIRCUMCISED AND MY BABY IS FINE .

Michaela - posted on 05/27/2009

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We chose not to have our son circumcised. My fiance isn't circumcised and we didn't see it as something really necessary. In fact, around the time we were making our decision, my sister was having issues with my nephew's circumcision. It had started to grow back and needed to be redone. Members of my family complained a lot about us not having Joey circumcised. They kept talking about how different he would be. It was awkward and hard to try to tell them that Jesse wasn't done. I think that a lot of moms are now deciding not to do it and when the kids get older everyone will be different.

Christina - posted on 05/26/2009

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According to our doctor there is no recommendation by the American Society of Pediatrics either way. There are some studies that show there is a slight decreased chance of infections and std's as they get older if they are circumcised. But there isn't enough proof to say that circumcision is the reason for the decrease. Our doctor indicated that it is mostly a cultural thing.

I left my 10 month olds circumcision in his dads hand. It didn't matter to me either way. In the end it didn't matter because he was hypospadias and chordee (very minor case with how the skin was shaped). In order to correct the problem, they moved the skin and it resulted in what appears to be a circumcision. The reason I went into detail about this is because it involved a lot more than the circumcision and he did just fine. He was a little upset right after the surgery, we brought him home that day, and gave him just one dose of pain medicine (was a little cranky and tired) and never opened the remainder of the pain medicine after that first dose. He did very well and never complained.

On a note about cleanliness. I was told my a nurse at my OBGYN that it is more likely for an uncircumcised penis to get an infection if cleaned the same way as a circumcised penis. Meaning if there is a lack of care/knowledge when cleaning an uncircumcised penis is more likely to get and infection than and circumcised penis. It isn't a problem if you clean your baby correctly and teach him how to clean himself. She indicated she has saw cases where the mom just didn't know how to clean them right and it caused infections and even in one case she mentioned caused a slight deformation.

Jaime - posted on 05/26/2009

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Quoting Jenifer:

Sorry, I guess I'm not sure what sexual abuse has to do with circumcision. Do you mean you're worried about wiping off his penis when you change a diaper? Don't you do that anyway for your circumcised son? How is it any different? You'll need to wipe him while he's in diapers and teach him to wash himself as he potty-trains if he has a foreskin or not. I don't see how there is any difference in the level of 'touching' either way. I'm not sure where you got your "medical facts" but they are filled with myths. Once again, it is not cleaner or healthier to be circumcised - that's why no major medical organization recommends doing it routinely.


Yes, very well put.  I too have never come across medical findings that base the necessity of circumcisions on cleanliness.  And circumcised or not---I completely agree---a child's penis needs to be washed because removing foreskin does not make boys immune to infections.  

[deleted account]

Sorry, I guess I'm not sure what sexual abuse has to do with circumcision. Do you mean you're worried about wiping off his penis when you change a diaper? Don't you do that anyway for your circumcised son? How is it any different? You'll need to wipe him while he's in diapers and teach him to wash himself as he potty-trains if he has a foreskin or not. I don't see how there is any difference in the level of 'touching' either way. I'm not sure where you got your "medical facts" but they are filled with myths. Once again, it is not cleaner or healthier to be circumcised - that's why no major medical organization recommends doing it routinely.

Rebekah - posted on 05/26/2009

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Quoting Jaime:



Quoting Rebekah:

i have a nearly 3 year old and he was done at 18month, because of my financial situation i wasn't able to do it at 6 weeks like i wanted. he recovered from it fine and i woudn't have it any other way, my sons father had no say in this because he wasn't the one that would be toilet training him. i did it because as a single mum i wasn't going to be the one to teach him to pull back the skin and clean it, i could never see myself touching my son like that, they do use a cream to numb the area and also a pathedine injuction for the highly active children out there like my son. my son has not been traumitised by this at all. i was brought up with a family that believed in it for religious resons but i did it for personal reasons. also when u are with someone you can't brush off what they believe in, it's just not the way relationships work and if you don't want to have kids with someone who won't agree with you then that is a good thing, woman are not the deciders of all, when there are 2 parents, it's 2 parents that decide what happens to the child. sorry i am opinionated.






You contradict yourself a lot in your statement because at one point you say that your Son's Father had no say in the decision to have the circumcision done, but at the end you say "when there are 2 parents, it's 2 parents that decide what happens to the child"...is this only if the couple is together?  If so, I think this is a bit selfish...just because you are not with the Father of your child does not mean that he has no right to help make important decisions about your Son.  And using the excuse that you had your Son circumcised because you were going to be toilet training him and don't want be the one to show him how to pull the skin back and clean it is just ridiculous!  Touching your child's genitals for the purpose of cleaning them is necessary.  Even a circumcised penis needs to be cleaned thoroughly and your Son won't magically know how to clean his circumcised penis any better than if it wasn't circumcised---I promise you!  Children learn from their parents, and if you are already dreading the idea of having to show your Son how to properly care for his physical body, then what will happen when he's older and hits puberty and then when he starts having sex?  If your Son doesn't learn from you and his Father, how do you expect him to know anything?  Sure, you can leave it up to education and health class...but that's a long way off.





i'm sorry can't you read the single parent part? i am a single parent and because of my sexual abuse throughout my family and myself personally, i would not touch my son and that is my choice. my sons father didn't ha say because he wasn't around to make that decision, and when he was he didn't care, if his father was around then it would be different but he's not. when 2 people are in a relationship and have a child together they make decisions together, not just the mother because she thinks something, or the father cause he thinks something. for a woman to say that a male isn't allowed to be apart of the decision making about their child is wrong.



if you are happy for your child to go uncirc'ed then fine they may suffer medical condidions later on in life, and personally i would not want to sleep with a man who is uncirc'ed because u have no idea if it is clean or not. i based mine on medical findings, and on the fact that my father got hiself circ'ed when he was 35 because he belives it is cleaner and based on medical fats it is. 



 



 

Tricia - posted on 05/26/2009

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Our first child was a boy, and I was surprised at how easily this topic was handled in our situation. We decided to get our son circumcised. Our hospital used local anethsetics and it healed in 2 days. Two days of pain that my son cannot remember or many hurtful and emotional scars from teasing. Kids can be mean, to us it was no question that this is what we would do.

[deleted account]

When my son was born he had what the doctor called a natural partial circumcision. Basically it meant he didn't have very much foreskin and it was as if he had a natural circumcision and the doctor wouldn't perform circumcision until he was at least 6 months old. By the time he was 6 months old his foreskin had grown more and he was circumcised under anesthetics. He was perfectly fine, the only trouble we had was when he was waking up from the anesthetics he cried for about half and hour then he was fine.

[deleted account]

Quoting Kelsey:



Quoting Jenifer:

I suppose I'm not sure what your preference sexually has to do with your baby's penis. It's not like that penis will be any of your business after the boy's first few years of life. Just because you prefer one thing doesn't mean your son will or that any future partners will. On top of that, if that is a good reason, would you also consider changing baby's eye and hair color, or giving him a nose job so that he's closer to what you find attractive? And if not, how is altering his penis any different?

Penises that are not circumcised are not dirty or harder to clean, either. I mean, if the foreskin was such a hotbed for disease and infection, how exactly did we get along before circumcision was invented? And why is it that the rest of the world (the 80% or so that are not circumcised) don't seem to have any problem with it?





Not to be rude Jenifer but the fact of you saying your baby is none of your business after the first few years of life is just ridiculous. You bring a child into the world it IS your business for the rest of your life. Each parent has their own formed opinion about this. It has NOTHING to do with changing eye or hair color, or even giving him a nose job? If you read on you would see parents do this for hygeine and medical reasons. Altering a "penis" is very different from all of that. From personal views which I am entitled to, uncircumcised males ARE dirty and harder to clean. Sweat and bacteria form much quicker due to being so enclosed even if they do know how to "clean" it properly. Regardless males were born the way they are and should be kept that way just for the fact that if it needed to be otherwise they would never have been born with foreskin. Again it is a personal decision and has NOTHING NOTHING NOTHING to do with it not being the mothers business OR wanting to alter what your baby looks like because clearly, it is not visible to the world such as things like eyes and hair. So before you go saying RIDICULOUS things like that, open up your eyes.





You're right, you are certainly entitled you your personal views. My point is that your opinion is not based in medical fact. Uncircumcised penises are not dirty, nor are they harder to clean. If this were the case, penis infections would be the norm outside the US (since no other country routinely circumcises) and perhaps just one health organization in the world would endorese the practice. They're actually quite easy to clean, and the foreskin serves to protect the penis from infection, not cause it. That's one of the reasons it is there. In some countries, uncircumcised females are thought to be dirty, but that isn't true either. Since there is no medical or hygenic reason for circumcision, how can it be anything other that cosmetic surgery?

[deleted account]

Quoting Kelsey:



Quoting Jenifer:

I suppose I'm not sure what your preference sexually has to do with your baby's penis. It's not like that penis will be any of your business after the boy's first few years of life. Just because you prefer one thing doesn't mean your son will or that any future partners will. On top of that, if that is a good reason, would you also consider changing baby's eye and hair color, or giving him a nose job so that he's closer to what you find attractive? And if not, how is altering his penis any different?

Penises that are not circumcised are not dirty or harder to clean, either. I mean, if the foreskin was such a hotbed for disease and infection, how exactly did we get along before circumcision was invented? And why is it that the rest of the world (the 80% or so that are not circumcised) don't seem to have any problem with it?





Not to be rude Jenifer but the fact of you saying your baby is none of your business after the first few years of life is just ridiculous. You bring a child into the world it IS your business for the rest of your life. Each parent has their own formed opinion about this. It has NOTHING to do with changing eye or hair color, or even giving him a nose job? If you read on you would see parents do this for hygeine and medical reasons. Altering a "penis" is very different from all of that. From personal views which I am entitled to, uncircumcised males ARE dirty and harder to clean. Sweat and bacteria form much quicker due to being so enclosed even if they do know how to "clean" it properly. Regardless males were born the way they are and should be kept that way just for the fact that if it needed to be otherwise they would never have been born with foreskin. Again it is a personal decision and has NOTHING NOTHING NOTHING to do with it not being the mothers business OR wanting to alter what your baby looks like because clearly, it is not visible to the world such as things like eyes and hair. So before you go saying RIDICULOUS things like that, open up your eyes.





You're right, you are certainly entitled you your personal views. My point is that your opinion is not based in medical fact. Uncircumcised penises are not dirty, nor are they harder to clean. If this were the case, penis infections would be the norm outside the US (since no other country routinely circumcises) and perhaps just one health organization in the world would endorese the practice. They're actually quite easy to clean, and the foreskin serves to protect the penis from infection, not cause it. That's one of the reasons it is there. In some countries, uncircumcised females are thought to be dirty, but that isn't true either. Since there is no medical or hygenic reason for circumcision, how can it be anything other that cosmetic surgery?

Kelsey - posted on 05/26/2009

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Quoting Jenifer:

I suppose I'm not sure what your preference sexually has to do with your baby's penis. It's not like that penis will be any of your business after the boy's first few years of life. Just because you prefer one thing doesn't mean your son will or that any future partners will. On top of that, if that is a good reason, would you also consider changing baby's eye and hair color, or giving him a nose job so that he's closer to what you find attractive? And if not, how is altering his penis any different?

Penises that are not circumcised are not dirty or harder to clean, either. I mean, if the foreskin was such a hotbed for disease and infection, how exactly did we get along before circumcision was invented? And why is it that the rest of the world (the 80% or so that are not circumcised) don't seem to have any problem with it?


Not to be rude Jenifer but the fact of you saying your baby is none of your business after the first few years of life is just ridiculous. You bring a child into the world it IS your business for the rest of your life. Each parent has their own formed opinion about this. It has NOTHING to do with changing eye or hair color, or even giving him a nose job? If you read on you would see parents do this for hygeine and medical reasons. Altering a "penis" is very different from all of that. From personal views which I am entitled to, uncircumcised males ARE dirty and harder to clean. Sweat and bacteria form much quicker due to being so enclosed even if they do know how to "clean" it properly. Regardless males were born the way they are and should be kept that way just for the fact that if it needed to be otherwise they would never have been born with foreskin. Again it is a personal decision and has NOTHING NOTHING NOTHING to do with it not being the mothers business OR wanting to alter what your baby looks like because clearly, it is not visible to the world such as things like eyes and hair. So before you go saying RIDICULOUS things like that, open up your eyes.

Jaime - posted on 05/26/2009

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Quoting Melissa:



Quoting Loureen:

They dont offer it in Australia or do it unless you have a good medical reason or a solid religious reason !





 






Im very glad they dont! America has some strange ideas






I too am glad that there are a few countries left that believe in "don't fix it if it ain't broke"...lol  I think that North America has tried for years to be trend-setters, and unfortunately, given the fact that circumcision is not a necessary procedure, I feel that it has become more of a trend for boys to look like other boys to avoid being made fun of for being different.  It's so strange to think that your natural body can be considered different...it seems more logical to say that having surgery is what makes a person different.  It's also interesting that religion would require it...the saying "God created us in his image" comes to mind, which is the basis behind many religions.  That being said, if God did create us in his image--then it makes no sense to have a circumcision done for religious reasons...does it make men closer to God?  hmmm, I have a difficult time with "religious reasons"...let alone "solid" religious reasons.  Medical reasons are much different, and even they are up for debate most of the time.  Having a circumcision because there is a serious medical problem is different than having one because parents think it's easier.

Jaime - posted on 05/26/2009

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Quoting Rebekah:

i have a nearly 3 year old and he was done at 18month, because of my financial situation i wasn't able to do it at 6 weeks like i wanted. he recovered from it fine and i woudn't have it any other way, my sons father had no say in this because he wasn't the one that would be toilet training him. i did it because as a single mum i wasn't going to be the one to teach him to pull back the skin and clean it, i could never see myself touching my son like that, they do use a cream to numb the area and also a pathedine injuction for the highly active children out there like my son. my son has not been traumitised by this at all. i was brought up with a family that believed in it for religious resons but i did it for personal reasons. also when u are with someone you can't brush off what they believe in, it's just not the way relationships work and if you don't want to have kids with someone who won't agree with you then that is a good thing, woman are not the deciders of all, when there are 2 parents, it's 2 parents that decide what happens to the child. sorry i am opinionated.



You contradict yourself a lot in your statement because at one point you say that your Son's Father had no say in the decision to have the circumcision done, but at the end you say "when there are 2 parents, it's 2 parents that decide what happens to the child"...is this only if the couple is together?  If so, I think this is a bit selfish...just because you are not with the Father of your child does not mean that he has no right to help make important decisions about your Son.  And using the excuse that you had your Son circumcised because you were going to be toilet training him and don't want be the one to show him how to pull the skin back and clean it is just ridiculous!  Touching your child's genitals for the purpose of cleaning them is necessary.  Even a circumcised penis needs to be cleaned thoroughly and your Son won't magically know how to clean his circumcised penis any better than if it wasn't circumcised---I promise you!  Children learn from their parents, and if you are already dreading the idea of having to show your Son how to properly care for his physical body, then what will happen when he's older and hits puberty and then when he starts having sex?  If your Son doesn't learn from you and his Father, how do you expect him to know anything?  Sure, you can leave it up to education and health class...but that's a long way off.

Jaime - posted on 05/26/2009

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Quoting Veronica:

Wow, so many great opinions, and interesting points of view. We never thought about the matter - we had our three boys circ'ed - it sucked, and i was upset - but for us it was what we felt was right for our sons spiritually - take that as you will. Whatever the decision is - Im very controversial on these forums -- I personally think that I have every right to decide what will be done with my child as I see fit -- I would teach them right and wrong, and morals and values as I was taught and see fit. They are not adults, and if I feel that it will or will not benefit their future, i think as a parent I see to it that they are brought up properly and learn right and wrong. Like Sharon said - should we then have something to say about getting ears peirced, or tattos?? those hurt too! What it comes down to is this -- make the decision based on how you want to raise your children -- worrying about if your kids will be teased is hogwash bull -- kids are teased inevitably, and if kids have to tease someone about what they look like, then those kids are most likely that way becasue mom and dad are/were -- If you want to circ. then you raise your children to the values and morals you have with that decision -- if you dont want to circ - then raise your children to those values and morals. What about us woman? If you have no boobs, you are picked on, if you have huge boobs you are picked on -- so then should we change our breasts sizes because we are being teased? I have two sisters - mine are the biggest, one is medium, and the other is small -- should we all get breast augmentation just so we can all look alike?? I dont think the decision on circs should have to involve looks or popularity -- I love my husband no matter what his penis looks like -- I DIDNT MARRY HIS PENIS!! So to end this nicely -- make your decision based on more than looks /pros/cons -- make it based on how you want to raise your son -- what your morals and values are -- and as a parent, and an Adult. Take care, and don't base your relationship on this kind of argument -- really really look at what you both want for a family and how you want to raise your kids --- thats where the more important questions are... ok, im shutting up now! BYe!



 





While I agree that parents reserve the right to make decisions for their child, there are some that can be left up to the child when they are much older and capable of deciding for themselves.  There is absolutely no medical necessity for circumcision, which means that any reasoning behind it---religious or otherwise---is not an acceptable excuse.  You discuss the idea of 'right' and 'wrong'...but you also talk about morals and teaching your child in accordance with your beliefs and your own upbringing.  This brings me, once again, to the topic of female circumcision.  I bet that if you asked the religious elite in the countries that support FGM, they will tell you that it is necessary and in accordance with their beliefs...does that make it right?  And despite the disturbing reality of FGM (which is essentially removal of the female pleasure centre), is it accurate to say that it is wrong?  How can a society that supports male circumcision, be against female circumcision?  Just something to think about. 



I'm certain that many will try and argue the difference between male and female circumcision; however, I find it impossible to distinguish between them when they both involve the removal of something vital.  I'm sure that it can be argued that foreskin isn't vital for a man, and perhaps it is not as important as a clitoris, but it is there for a reason and removing it so that your child's penis is easier to clean is just silly.  Women have a lot more going on down there than Men---circumcised or not---and we have figured out how to keep up with hygiene.



At the end of the day, I believe in a person's right to choose...and parents reserve that right when their children are too young to decide; however, I think that we jump the gun on some decisions believing that it will be easier in the long run, when in fact we are making a decision based on our own interests and not that of our children.  Piercings are also ridiculous for young chidren that cannot talk and tell you that they do or do not want holes in their ears/nose/whatever...  Many people think it's cute for little girls to have earrings, but don't realize that they are removing a choice from their child, and that one day she will be quite capable of deciding if earrings are right for her.  It's absurd that we do things based on popular opinion and then try to argue right vs. wrong--- right and wrong are always relative to popular opinion unfortunately because these are man-made terminologies and are inherently flawed as a result!

Rebekah - posted on 05/26/2009

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i have a nearly 3 year old and he was done at 18month, because of my financial situation i wasn't able to do it at 6 weeks like i wanted. he recovered from it fine and i woudn't have it any other way, my sons father had no say in this because he wasn't the one that would be toilet training him. i did it because as a single mum i wasn't going to be the one to teach him to pull back the skin and clean it, i could never see myself touching my son like that, they do use a cream to numb the area and also a pathedine injuction for the highly active children out there like my son. my son has not been traumitised by this at all. i was brought up with a family that believed in it for religious resons but i did it for personal reasons. also when u are with someone you can't brush off what they believe in, it's just not the way relationships work and if you don't want to have kids with someone who won't agree with you then that is a good thing, woman are not the deciders of all, when there are 2 parents, it's 2 parents that decide what happens to the child. sorry i am opinionated.

[deleted account]

We didnt circumsise our son.

I personally see no need to do it. I also think using the "locker room" is a poor excuse for having it done. I also don't believe in tampering with our children's bodies for the sake of it (unless of course they need it medically).

How would you like it when your son gets older and learns that he could have experianced more arousal etc had he had not been done? He was done because his parents wanted it done. I personally think this decision should be left for the child in question for when they get older.

Boys are born with foreskin, it serves a purpose, just like we were born with a womb etc.



My Dad was circumsised when he was younger due to urine infections (he wished he was never done), they almost had to do my brother aswell. But they ended up being able to fix his infections without resulting in circumsision.



This is just my personal opinion though.

Mel - posted on 05/26/2009

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Quoting Loureen:

They dont offer it in Australia or do it unless you have a good medical reason or a solid religious reason !


 



Im very glad they dont! America has some strange ideas

Melissa - posted on 05/26/2009

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Quoting Veronica:

Wow, so many great opinions, and interesting points of view. We never thought about the matter - we had our three boys circ'ed - it sucked, and i was upset - but for us it was what we felt was right for our sons spiritually - take that as you will. Whatever the decision is - Im very controversial on these forums -- I personally think that I have every right to decide what will be done with my child as I see fit -- I would teach them right and wrong, and morals and values as I was taught and see fit. They are not adults, and if I feel that it will or will not benefit their future, i think as a parent I see to it that they are brought up properly and learn right and wrong. Like Sharon said - should we then have something to say about getting ears peirced, or tattos?? those hurt too! What it comes down to is this -- make the decision based on how you want to raise your children -- worrying about if your kids will be teased is hogwash bull -- kids are teased inevitably, and if kids have to tease someone about what they look like, then those kids are most likely that way becasue mom and dad are/were -- If you want to circ. then you raise your children to the values and morals you have with that decision -- if you dont want to circ - then raise your children to those values and morals. What about us woman? If you have no boobs, you are picked on, if you have huge boobs you are picked on -- so then should we change our breasts sizes because we are being teased? I have two sisters - mine are the biggest, one is medium, and the other is small -- should we all get breast augmentation just so we can all look alike?? I dont think the decision on circs should have to involve looks or popularity -- I love my husband no matter what his penis looks like -- I DIDNT MARRY HIS PENIS!! So to end this nicely -- make your decision based on more than looks /pros/cons -- make it based on how you want to raise your son -- what your morals and values are -- and as a parent, and an Adult. Take care, and don't base your relationship on this kind of argument -- really really look at what you both want for a family and how you want to raise your kids --- thats where the more important questions are... ok, im shutting up now! BYe!


I didnt circumsize my son for looks either it was I seen my nephews 3 of then all have gone through infection after infection screaming that there penis's hurt all the tim until each one finally wnet in to get circ'd as alot of doctors do not like to do it all 3 boys were from my same brother I did research I cried stressed out but I regreted it once I seen it at first but now I dont I know I could not have gone through and put my son through any of that my doctor said with having 3 emergency circs he advised me to get it done it was costly 400.00 and I seriously would not have put him through anything unless I thought it to be a good reason. I know some people never go through any of these problems being uncirc'd but seeing and knowwing it might effect my son I had to.



He was done at 6 days old never cried till he was hungry and never had any problems but I wish people didnt think I did it for looks like I care what my sons penis looks like I just want him to be happy and healthy

Melissa - posted on 05/26/2009

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Quoting Veronica:

Wow, so many great opinions, and interesting points of view. We never thought about the matter - we had our three boys circ'ed - it sucked, and i was upset - but for us it was what we felt was right for our sons spiritually - take that as you will. Whatever the decision is - Im very controversial on these forums -- I personally think that I have every right to decide what will be done with my child as I see fit -- I would teach them right and wrong, and morals and values as I was taught and see fit. They are not adults, and if I feel that it will or will not benefit their future, i think as a parent I see to it that they are brought up properly and learn right and wrong. Like Sharon said - should we then have something to say about getting ears peirced, or tattos?? those hurt too! What it comes down to is this -- make the decision based on how you want to raise your children -- worrying about if your kids will be teased is hogwash bull -- kids are teased inevitably, and if kids have to tease someone about what they look like, then those kids are most likely that way becasue mom and dad are/were -- If you want to circ. then you raise your children to the values and morals you have with that decision -- if you dont want to circ - then raise your children to those values and morals. What about us woman? If you have no boobs, you are picked on, if you have huge boobs you are picked on -- so then should we change our breasts sizes because we are being teased? I have two sisters - mine are the biggest, one is medium, and the other is small -- should we all get breast augmentation just so we can all look alike?? I dont think the decision on circs should have to involve looks or popularity -- I love my husband no matter what his penis looks like -- I DIDNT MARRY HIS PENIS!! So to end this nicely -- make your decision based on more than looks /pros/cons -- make it based on how you want to raise your son -- what your morals and values are -- and as a parent, and an Adult. Take care, and don't base your relationship on this kind of argument -- really really look at what you both want for a family and how you want to raise your kids --- thats where the more important questions are... ok, im shutting up now! BYe!


I didnt circumsize my son for looks either it was I seen my nephews 3 of then all have gone through infection after infection screaming that there penis's hurt all the tim until each one finally wnet in to get circ'd as alot of doctors do not like to do it all 3 boys were from my same brother I did research I cried stressed out but I regreted it once I seen it at first but now I dont I know I could not have gone through and put my son through any of that my doctor said with having 3 emergency circs he advised me to get it done it was costly 400.00 and I seriously would not have put him through anything unless I thought it to be a good reason. I know some people never go through any of these problems being uncirc'd but seeing and knowwing it might effect my son I had to.



He was done at 6 days old never cried till he was hungry and never had any problems but I wish people didnt think I did it for looks like I care what my sons penis looks like I just want him to be happy and healthy

Charlie - posted on 05/25/2009

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i thought my son would be circ'd but having spoke to my partner i do now understand where he was coming from for going against it if someone asked me if i wanted my daughter circ'd ( and they do use the same reasons to do it for a girl as they do a boy ) i would say no way in hell ! my personal opinion.

Catrina - posted on 05/25/2009

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I didn't go through all the postings, but a few at the beginning.......



I have 3 boys of my own. 10, 4 and 3. I also have a step son. All 4 boys are circumcised. My 1st son was circumcised within 32 hours of his birth, and there were no issues. My 2nd son was circumcised 2 weeks after birth, again no problems. The same with my 3rd son. In all reality - it wasn't a question of doing so. My husband is, and as is my many nephews and other family members. It was never really discussed as being something that could be a problem later in life. It was just done.



In my case, I have a defective ureter - and therefor has created multiple issues with my kidneys. I have a high risk of infections that skip my bladder and go straight to my kidneys. Knowing that this is something I could have passed down to my sons, looking back I am glad they are circumcised. The Doctor's have expressed their concerns about my children and having them checked. Done that, and thankfully so far all is A OK. I know that after my first son was born, the procedure was no longer covered under our insurance because it wasn't found to have more than a 50% benefit factor. It was 50/50 so for my other 2 sons - we paid a hefty price for it. Again not something we second guessed. The cost even increased in 1 year by $50 -- insane now that I think about it! ($275 and then $325)



I have however had 2 other experiences with the topic of circumcisions. A friend did not circumcise her son, and he ended up getting a really bad infection because the forskin was not pulled back and cleaned properly. She was a single mom, no male influence in her life. SO she thought she was hurting her son everytime she tried to clean him. She cleaned him each changing, and he squirmed and wiggled and sometimes even cried so she worried she was hurting him by pulling it back....



Than on the other hand, I had a cousing end up deciding to get circumcised at the age of 19. This was the more horrific experience of his life. He was in pain for nearly a month, and felt like he needed to sit in bed with nothing on his penis just to let it air out and have NOTHING touch him. He was upset that his parents did not do it when he was younger so he didn't have to go through with it.



Something to just really need to look into if there are concerns or opinions that are conflicting.

Charlie - posted on 05/25/2009

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They dont offer it in Australia or do it unless you have a good medical reason or a solid religious reason !

Veronica - posted on 05/25/2009

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By the way -- a lot of people get their babies ears peirced -- i personally think that that is too young -- but that is my opinion -- maybe that's bad? or not.. so really - its not about anything but your own beliefs - and really i think we all need to quit bashing every down for how they were raised or what they believe to be -- i dont think anyone is entirely right or entirely wrong on any of these forums -- I enjoy this diversity, Ive learned great things from all the women in teh circle of moms -- and I think this is a great place to really learn and teach -- commend and praise each other for being MOMS period -- everyone so far on this sounds like a loving, caring, responsible mother -- we aren't perfect, we are not the same - please quit the bashing -- if you aren't religious, thats fine. If you are, thats fine too. if you are young, fine, if your'e old, fine, if you have one child and dont want more fine, if you have ten and you want more fine -- who gives a hooey horsesh*t -- is this a popularity contest? who can win the best mom award? We were given this wonderful gift, lets enjoy it, and commend each other for the endurance/selfsacrifice/strength/wisdom - etc. Come on women -- we need to HELP each other - I dont like when someone tells me Im wrong -- i fall to peices, get depressed, and things dont work out - but when im encouraged, helped and not JUDGED - i can do anything ----- Good Job to everyone in the Circle of Moms group and beyond -- I think every MOm on here is the best she can be!!

Veronica - posted on 05/25/2009

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Wow, so many great opinions, and interesting points of view. We never thought about the matter - we had our three boys circ'ed - it sucked, and i was upset - but for us it was what we felt was right for our sons spiritually - take that as you will. Whatever the decision is - Im very controversial on these forums -- I personally think that I have every right to decide what will be done with my child as I see fit -- I would teach them right and wrong, and morals and values as I was taught and see fit. They are not adults, and if I feel that it will or will not benefit their future, i think as a parent I see to it that they are brought up properly and learn right and wrong. Like Sharon said - should we then have something to say about getting ears peirced, or tattos?? those hurt too! What it comes down to is this -- make the decision based on how you want to raise your children -- worrying about if your kids will be teased is hogwash bull -- kids are teased inevitably, and if kids have to tease someone about what they look like, then those kids are most likely that way becasue mom and dad are/were -- If you want to circ. then you raise your children to the values and morals you have with that decision -- if you dont want to circ - then raise your children to those values and morals. What about us woman? If you have no boobs, you are picked on, if you have huge boobs you are picked on -- so then should we change our breasts sizes because we are being teased? I have two sisters - mine are the biggest, one is medium, and the other is small -- should we all get breast augmentation just so we can all look alike?? I dont think the decision on circs should have to involve looks or popularity -- I love my husband no matter what his penis looks like -- I DIDNT MARRY HIS PENIS!! So to end this nicely -- make your decision based on more than looks /pros/cons -- make it based on how you want to raise your son -- what your morals and values are -- and as a parent, and an Adult. Take care, and don't base your relationship on this kind of argument -- really really look at what you both want for a family and how you want to raise your kids --- thats where the more important questions are... ok, im shutting up now! BYe!

Sharon - posted on 05/25/2009

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I would recommend reading up on the subject. We circumcised our son and he's just fine. It took a whole 10 minutes from waiting room, patient room and back. The procedure is very routine, very clean and safe. I would compare it to getting your ears pierced. You have a flap of skin on your ear and you get something punctured through it just for what- beauty I suppose. I would take to your doctor, your friends with sons. Having a foreskin increases the risk of urological infections. Plus, your son may have it done later on in life, so might as well do it while he's young than old.

Liz - posted on 05/25/2009

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I have 2 boys, both of which are circumcised. However, both boys did not have the same procedure done. My first son was done the "most common way" and he was very red for a few days afterwards, but it really didn't seem to affect his temperament. My second son had a ring put on, and the foreskin gradually came off on his own, with no redness or discomfort at all. I don't know if this is helpful, but maybe you could find a doctor that would do a circumcision this way. It really didn't seem to cause him any pain, and this might also ease your apprehension about it. Hope I could help!

[deleted account]

Sandra, make sure your a doctor isn't a bit overzealous about circumcision - a lot of them in the US still are. Phimosis (the skin not retracting) is totally normal through puberty. And redness can happen sometimes when the foreskin begins to retract, so not always a problem on its own. Obviously, I have no idea what your son's particular situation is, but I've spoken with other moms whose doctors were quick to suggest circumcision when there wasn't really a problem at all, so I thought I'd put that out there... Hope the appointment goes well with the surgeon.

Sandra - posted on 05/25/2009

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well, my son is 2 and we have not circumcised him because we are catholic and we just don;t believe in it. We feel that if the child was born that way, then thats the way it was meant to be. But...as he is growing, his skin is not folding back the way it should be (the doctor said) and sometimes it gets really red and easier for him to get infections. So even though i am extremely agains this procedure, if it means that he will not have as many infections and his skin will go back correctly, then i might think twice about it. we just have to do it before he gets older. I am going to a pediatric surgeon this week, only to see what he has to say about it. i can come back and give you some more info if you'd like. =)

Jaime - posted on 05/25/2009

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Quoting Jessica:

Excuse me? If that's your excuse for not having a child, with a man who wants one!!! You should be ashamed of yourself. I had my son circumsized, I was in the room with him when they did and made sure that they used anesthsetics on him. He had to have gauze with vaseline spread on it, over his private area for a week. I look at it this way. He'll never remember having it done and won't be psychologicaly scarred from it. I know three family members who had to be circumcised later in life due to infections that would go away. Their ages were 5, 18 and 65 years. Do you want your son to remember such pain and torture? Not only from the surgery but the persecussion from his friends and peers thinking that he's dirty and the no girl will want him!



"You should be ashamed of yourself"? ......hmmm, not quite sure what your angle is here.  Your comment is a bit harsh considering that we are all entitled to have an opinion on this subject.  If your husband/boyfriend wanted to circumcise your daughter and insisted on it because he feels it will be more medically beneficial to help ward off potential diseases, would you want to have a child with this man?  Circumcision should be the choice of the individual that it is being performed on, because you (parents) have no possible way of knowing later in life if having this procedure or not having it will be harmful or beneficial to your child.  What would you do if the doctor made a mistake during the procedure and your baby was left without a penis---and yes, this has happend before (there is a video available called "John/Joan" that details the horrific repercussions of a circumcision gone wrong!).  Although with today's technology, the likelihood that a mistake like this would be made again is far less than the chances of it happening 30 years ago; however, it's still an unneccessary surgery that is more for convenience to the parent than to the child.  And, I have a couple of friends that are not circumcised and they had no problems with girls thinking they were dirty and not wanting them (they are all married or in stable relationships)---I think this frame of thinking is a bit childish.

Melissa - posted on 05/25/2009

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Hello. My name is Melissa and i have a son who is now 6. My husband at the time was not circumcised so i let him choose what we should do. He chose not to have it done. When my son was 1 1/2 the skin on his penis started to completely grow over and close up. When we asked the doctors about it when he was little they said we didnt have to pull it back to clean it. It would take care of itself. The matter was he wasnt peeing like he should of been and he was in pain. Personally if I had another son i would definately circumcise him. Each to there own and it is your choice. good luck

Samantha - posted on 05/25/2009

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My husband and I had discussed this( if our little one was to be a boy), and we both said and agreed that we would not get him cicumcised that when he grew older it would be his decision as it is his body and who are we to decide the fate of his body part, when it is he, who will be the one who has to look at himself in the mirror every day as he gets older and more aware of his body. Good luck.

Sarah - posted on 05/25/2009

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I am currently in nursing school and just stood in on a circumcision last week. I agree wtih you it is completely unnecessary-if you properly clean your child and teach him to do the same, there is tons of research which shows it is not a medically necessary proceudre. Most peolple now choose to do it for looks which is sad, considering what the baby has to go through. Having said that, they do inject lidocaine at the base of the penis and wait for 15 minutes for some numbing effects. Some doctors (and I'm sure you could request this) also use a topical numbing gel. The baby still screemed and I was mortified. I wish people could change their ideas about a foreskin being unatractive or dangerous. Also, from talking to men they say their is more stimulation for them who are NOT cirumcised. It is an out-dated procedure and parents and doctors need to catch up with the times.

Good luck to you and yours

Cathy - posted on 05/25/2009

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i would stand by what u believe, dont just get it done just because ur boyfriend wants to, i have 2 boys and havent even thought of getting them done

[deleted account]

I suppose I'm not sure what your preference sexually has to do with your baby's penis. It's not like that penis will be any of your business after the boy's first few years of life. Just because you prefer one thing doesn't mean your son will or that any future partners will. On top of that, if that is a good reason, would you also consider changing baby's eye and hair color, or giving him a nose job so that he's closer to what you find attractive? And if not, how is altering his penis any different?

Penises that are not circumcised are not dirty or harder to clean, either. I mean, if the foreskin was such a hotbed for disease and infection, how exactly did we get along before circumcision was invented? And why is it that the rest of the world (the 80% or so that are not circumcised) don't seem to have any problem with it?

Jessica - posted on 05/25/2009

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Also when the birds and the bees topic comes up and Daddy has to tell him about it'll help that their both missing the same parts.

Jessica - posted on 05/25/2009

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Excuse me? If that's your excuse for not having a child, with a man who wants one!!! You should be ashamed of yourself. I had my son circumsized, I was in the room with him when they did and made sure that they used anesthsetics on him. He had to have gauze with vaseline spread on it, over his private area for a week. I look at it this way. He'll never remember having it done and won't be psychologicaly scarred from it. I know three family members who had to be circumcised later in life due to infections that would go away. Their ages were 5, 18 and 65 years. Do you want your son to remember such pain and torture? Not only from the surgery but the persecussion from his friends and peers thinking that he's dirty and the no girl will want him!

Mel - posted on 05/25/2009

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i agree, that comment made by Amanda was completely out of line. it is your opinion not everyone elses. i find men that are circumsized very unattractive not the other way around.

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