Depression and Nightmares.................

Theresa - posted on 05/27/2009 ( 7 moms have responded )

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I have been abused time and time again.....That is how my first child was born, now that I am pregnant again with a very loving Fiance.

I can not seem to get rid of the nightmares of my passed and the constant feeling of wanting to hide under a rock and die.

What should I do since I don't have the money for counselors or a psychiatrist?

7 Comments

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Theresa - posted on 05/27/2009

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I apologize for writing the wrong name hun it was meant for the other lady sorry

Victoria - posted on 05/27/2009

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Im sorry Theresa I didn't write the post about god .....



Victoria



and for some reason i have 2 profiles the other one does not have a picture

Theresa - posted on 05/27/2009

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Well Victoria I thank you for your kindness, I grew up in a catholic family of twelve, and I have explored many different types of religion, I do not however blame "GOD" for anything, and I know that my choices in life have led me to many things.
I have forgiven my opressers many times over, it is the forgetting that is my problem.
I am sorry to say that I am one who can not and will not believe just for the sake of believing , I myself have proven TO ME that there is something out there, but that is my choice and it to will either lead to a good or bad thing, but just reading the bible has never been enough for me, the only thing that seems to help is kind and understanding souls that will talk with me, I try to do the same for others and that is what I depend on.

Candice - posted on 05/27/2009

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Hi, I understand how you feel. Can I suggest one really crazy, but 100% effective thing you can do. I don't know if you are a God fearing or believing person - heck, you could be Jewish for all I know, but here's my 5 cents.

I had a similar past and I ended up going to a church counselor (it is free) The one thing that helped me was forgiveness - it's a terrible thing to say to someone, I was so hurt when I was told that it was me who had to forgive to set things right. Especially when I was the one who was hurt and abused etc...
But after reading Matthew 18:21-35 I ended up getting down on my knees and choosing to forgive my offender in the name of Jesus (It gave me the strength to leave him). All I can say is that I cried and cried, but it was as if I a huge weight left me. I also chose to forgive myself for staying with the man even though he was abusing me, for not having the self-respect and worth I should have. Because in the word, God tells us how important we are: (I have listed something for you below:
My Child,

You may not know me,
but I know everything about you.
Psalm 139:1

I know when you sit down and when you rise up.
Psalm 139:2

I am familiar with all your ways.
Psalm 139:3

Even the very hairs on your head are numbered.
Matthew 10:29-31

For you were made in my image.
Genesis 1:27

In me you live and move and have your being.
Acts 17:28

For you are my offspring.
Acts 17:28

I knew you even before you were conceived.
Jeremiah 1:4-5

I chose you when I planned creation.
Ephesians 1:11-12

You were not a mistake,
for all your days are written in my book.
Psalm 139:15-16

I determined the exact time of your birth
and where you would live.
Acts 17:26

You are fearfully and wonderfully made.
Psalm 139:14

I knit you together in your mother's womb.
Psalm 139:13

And brought you forth on the day you were born.
Psalm 71:6

I have been misrepresented
by those who don't know me.
John 8:41-44

I am not distant and angry,
but am the complete expression of love.
1 John 4:16

And it is my desire to lavish my love on you.
1 John 3:1

Simply because you are my child
and I am your Father.
1 John 3:1

I offer you more than your earthly father ever could.
Matthew 7:11

For I am the perfect father.
Matthew 5:48

Every good gift that you receive comes from my hand.
James 1:17

For I am your provider and I meet all your needs.
Matthew 6:31-33

My plan for your future has always been filled with hope.
Jeremiah 29:11

Because I love you with an everlasting love.
Jeremiah 31:3

My thoughts toward you are countless
as the sand on the seashore.
Psalms 139:17-18

And I rejoice over you with singing.
Zephaniah 3:17

I will never stop doing good to you.
Jeremiah 32:40

For you are my treasured possession.
Exodus 19:5

I desire to establish you
with all my heart and all my soul.
Jeremiah 32:41

And I want to show you great and marvelous things.
Jeremiah 33:3

If you seek me with all your heart,
you will find me.
Deuteronomy 4:29

Delight in me and I will give you
the desires of your heart.
Psalm 37:4

For it is I who gave you those desires.
Philippians 2:13

I am able to do more for you
than you could possibly imagine.
Ephesians 3:20

For I am your greatest encourager.
2 Thessalonians 2:16-17

I am also the Father who comforts you
in all your troubles.
2 Corinthians 1:3-4

When you are brokenhearted,
I am close to you.
Psalm 34:18

As a shepherd carries a lamb,
I have carried you close to my heart.
Isaiah 40:11

One day I will wipe away
every tear from your eyes.
Revelation 21:3-4

And I'll take away all the pain
you have suffered on this earth.
Revelation 21:3-4

I am your Father, and I love you
even as I love my son, Jesus.
John 17:23

For in Jesus, my love for you is revealed.
John 17:26

He is the exact representation of my being.
Hebrews 1:3

He came to demonstrate that I am for you,
not against you.
Romans 8:31

And to tell you that I am not counting your sins.
2 Corinthians 5:18-19

Jesus died so that you and I could be reconciled.
2 Corinthians 5:18-19

His death was the ultimate expression
of my love for you.
1 John 4:10

I gave up everything I loved
that I might gain your love.
Romans 8:31-32

If you receive the gift of my son Jesus,
you receive me.
1 John 2:23

And nothing will ever separate you
from my love again.
Romans 8:38-39

Come home and I'll throw the biggest party
heaven has ever seen.
Luke 15:7

I have always been Father,
and will always be Father.
Ephesians 3:14-15

My question is…
Will you be my child?
John 1:12-13

I am waiting for you.
Luke 15:11-32

Love, Your Dad
Almighty God

We can never blame God for things that happen to us through our own choices. I chose to date that man, I chose to stay with that man. That man chose to hit me. God gave us free will and people always want to blame Him when things go wrong. But we all forget that we make our own choices that put us in our own predicaments and then we want to blame God. That's exactly what I used to do.

Put your trust in Him, he will deliver you from your nightmares and fear. God bless you.

Victoria - posted on 05/27/2009

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Same here i was cornered into having an abortion with the first and then after i got married I lost one of my twins in my second pregnancy. I completley agree with samantha. obviously it will always be in your head as ii know all to well but thats all it is is a memory it cant get you anymore try to remember that but if you do need someone to talk to im also here prpixie730@gmail.com my name is victoria.

Samantha-jacqueline - posted on 05/27/2009

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did you know its normal to feel this way? I went through a hard time in my past ... and now im married we had 6 miscarries and when i was pregnent with my son we almost lost him 6 times.. I had nightmares every day and was sooo depressed even to the point where I would push my husband away and hope he'd leave... luckly he didnt and my son was born and everything was fine... now im pregnent again with our daughter and I started doing the same thing again! fighting everyday crying all the time being depressed nightmares of my children dying etc.... I was os scared i went to talk to my family doctor he said part of it is all the fear of your past ( ex boyfriend etc) but a big part is your hormones LOL believe it or not lol.. its normal even to feel depressed ... hang in talk to your family doctor and tell him or her... it could be a depress some women get it through the pregnecy and some after ( baby blues ) if you need anaything let me know Ive been through it 2 times now LOL

stef_sam_4e@hotmail.com

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