Do any mom's have hobbies? Or a way to stay sane other than being a mom?

Megan - posted on 04/22/2009 ( 10 moms have responded )

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I am a 24 year old mom of two little girls...I quit my job 3 months ago so i could be a stay at home mom, which was an amazing blessing that my fiance and I were able to do that. I love my girls more then anything in the world but adjusting from going to a corporate working mom to just stay at home mom hasn't been easy. I feel like i've lost "myself" (whatever that was to begin with). My fiance keeps telling me to get a hobby and do things that i enjoy for a couple hours a day even if that means the kids go into daycare just for a few hours a week..but how do you figure out what you like all over again? lol sounds stupid but i've been trying to figure out something that would give me a break and alittle bit of sanity! Can anyone relate or give any advice!! HELP!

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Ashley - posted on 04/23/2009

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I believe that your sanity does not come from the activities you can become involved in once you make the change to a stay at home mom. People identify themselves these days by what they "do" not by who they "are". Have you ever noticed that when someone is introduced, they say "this is so and so and she is an accountant for such and such." To go from cooperate to home is a big step, I am sure you are feeling a bit overwhelmed with the transition and you probably lost a little bit of who you are. Try to keep in mind that you are not and have never been a job title. You are a person and you are unique. I am sure you are going stir crazy because your life isn't "business" anymore, and instead of adult conversation, you are baby talking, and instead of your cute business clothes, you are walking around in sweats all day (by the way, you feel much better if you take the time to get dressed). Hobbies and play dates and support groups are great, but do not loose focus on why you choose to be at home. Stay at home moms can be just as or more overwhelmed than the working women out there because they pack their schedules full of activities to keep them occupied. The kids will keep you occupied enough. Set a good schedule, learn what activities interest you, do not take on too much, and enjoy your time with those girls! The adjustment will take a while, but remember, you are precious to your family, and your time with them is priceless. Feel good about your decision. You didn't loose "yourself" you lost a job title, and now you get to give "yourself" to your family. Enjoy it!

Brenda - posted on 04/22/2009

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I write in my spare time, and I play video games on the Xbox and Computer, as well as read when I can. I can't do the pure SAHM thing so I have a part time job usually (I wasn't able to find one while I was pregnant because i was so sick but normally I work 15 hours a week) and that is part of what keeps me sane...lol.

Sarah - posted on 04/22/2009

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I've been a stay at home mom for almost 3 years now. Dang three years already! I got involved with my church and I have made some great friends through local mom groups. Find a volunteer something that really interests you and get involved! Find local moms and have a playdate once a week and make sure you get some you time. It's very easy to seclude yourself as a stay at home mom, but that can cause major problems. If you don't have a local moms group stat one and advertise! A great online group that connects people in your are is momslikeme.com.

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Megan - posted on 04/23/2009

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Wow thank you everyone for your help! it's all made me realize alot. Especially what you said Ashley Hudson :) i never really looked at it or thought of it that way..and yet you are so right! The transition hasn't been easy but with all the suggestions I know over time I will find that "something" that interests me and helps me stay sane for my family...lol. Thanks again to everyone!

Emma - posted on 04/23/2009

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Hi i have a little boy just gone a year and have postnatal depression but thankfully am recovering from it, the best thing i did was to go to toddler groups every morning. When i had my little boy my health visitor was useless and said there was nothing to do where i lived. I however looked into it myself and found loads of mother and baby groups, so mon to thurs i go to different ones. Jack my little boy loves it as he plays with the other kids and it also gives me a break and keeps me sane as i get to chat and have a cuppa with all the other mammies! Also on an evening for an hour two days a week i go to the gym with a friend, it gives me a little break as my partner looks after him. It is importnat for you to have 'you' time. Also have you tried taking the kids swimming? they do all sorts of different classes thes days.

Kylie - posted on 04/22/2009

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It's so important to have a little time for yourself during the days to recharge and have space to be alone with your thoughts. I have a few hobbies which I haven't really had much time for lately as my newest edition only wants to nap on or with me. I love doing my art (painting and doll making) and hopefully as he gets older i cant spend more time on that. I do gardening with the kids , plant herbs and veggies and walk around garden shops getting myself inspired, i find this really relaxing and for filling. When my husband gets home form work in the afternoons i leave the kids with him for 45 min and go for a walk or have a bath and do my nails if the weather is bad, this recharges me so i have the energy finish off the day. I'd like to do some water colour painting classes or join a gym but moneys is a bit tight for these things at the moment. Even jumping online and using these forums is a little bit of me time during the days, i enjoy clicking around and researching things.

Michelle - posted on 04/22/2009

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You could get the kids involved in story time at your local library, try your hand at photography, start a scrap book (maybe get a little help from the kids?), try gardening (again, something the kids can help with), or settle in with a good book (great because you can stop any time to do whatever you need to for the kids). There are lots of options..and if your not sure where to start do a random draw...you might like something you didnt expect to. : ) Hope this gets rid of your mommy dolldrums.

Lisa - posted on 04/22/2009

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I have been a stay a SAHM for four years. During that time ive had 3 littlies. I had planned to go back to work after our second child but another little one surprised us. Before kids i was a very spontaneous do what i like person and always kept busy so staying at home was hard to adjust to spec with no timefor myself. After my first i enrolled in study and did a diploma through correspondence as my own time but after having my son i didnt have much time for anything so just relied on visiting friends and playgroup as an outlet. I do read alot also. I know until my youngest is 2 i wont return to parttime work as having kids has also been my dream.You just dont realise how much you sacrifice as a mummy. As long as you find something u enjoy or just distract you sometimes can help alot..its only going to be a short while as the children grow so quickly...just keep reminding yourself of the good bits!

Mary - posted on 04/22/2009

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I am a stay at home mom of 6 kids. Most of the time I feel like I'm gonna go insane if I dont get some "me" time. I totally understand how you are feeling. Maybe you should try to set up dates to go do something with your friends, have some adult time. Or a monthly date with your fiance. I have dinner and movie night with my friends about once a month. I also got into Zumba classes, which is a dance workout class at the YMCA. Its nice to dance off some stress:) Or I just go for a walk and relax. Just find something that interests you and go for it. You gotta keep your sanity

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