Do i let my daughter stay be her cousin who has lice?

Amber - posted on 01/19/2010 ( 13 moms have responded )

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My in laws aren't very clean. When we go over there I have to make sure my daughter's hair is sprayed well with hair spary because I don't want her getting lice. She begs to spend the night there. She understands that her cousins have bugs but of course that doesn't matter to a 3 yr old who loves her cousins to death. These little girls have had lice their whole lives. They don't even itch anymore. It's so sad. But, back to the matter at hand, am I to stop my daughter from spending the night? She caught the bugs last time and it took me forever to get them out. I felt like I was the dirty negelctful parent. HELP!!!

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Christina - posted on 01/19/2010

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To be honest I wouldn't let my child stay the night or even go over to someones house who is infested with head lice. Like you said they are so hard to get under control plus it can be extremely expensive. What I'm concerned about it why these children have had lice for years? Where our their parents? Why hasn't something been done? I truly understand that it's hard to control but come on they have had them for years? To me it sounds like these children are being neglected, their parents can't just give up. I'm not trying to come off in an attacking way. But, I wouldn't allow my child to be around other children that I know have head lice. You have to protect your child.

Jenni - posted on 03/22/2011

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I know they're family and all but I wouldn't want my child around the kids until they are bug-free. Are her cousins in school???? If they're school age hasn't the school caught on if they've had lice their whole lives? Aren't most kids sent home if they have lice? Maybe they're not school age.

If the parents are that neglectful that there children have had lice their whole lives I'd be calling CPS. What are their living conditions like? It sounds to me like these poor children are suffering from neglect.

My brother had/has bedbugs in his appartment (nasty things are rampid these days) I wont allow him in my house until his place is exterminated. He completely understands.

Jessica - posted on 01/19/2010

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poor little girl. I remeber my cousins having the same problem growing up and I was never allowed to stay there but my mom would have them come over and then she would treat there hair for lice as soon her parents left and before we were allowed to play she also made her change into another out fit and was her clothes and we never got it. I wouldnt let my children into home that had lice.

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Emily - posted on 10/24/2013

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My daughter had head lice when she was in kindergarten. She had long curly and thick hair, and we let her decide what she wanted to do with her hair. She wanted to shave it all off, and that's what we did. :) It solved the problem, and she was happy. It sounds drastic, but she felt so beautiful. If cutting it isn't an option, try live shampoos and treatments. My daughter caught it again this year at school, and we did the treatment, sprayed down and everything. It just requires patience. :)

Mandy - posted on 03/22/2011

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I have a neighbor whos kids have lice so bad and ive told them to do something about it and they never do... it been 3 weeks! What Should i do?

Lucy - posted on 01/19/2010

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As a hairstylist and mom, the answer would be no dont send her... head lice is very contagious and the bugs spread and are hard to kill if bad enough. By the way hairspray will not stop or prevent anyone from getting head lice. Hate to say it but if the family cant get it under control I wouldnt be sending my child. By the way a dirty house is not the main factor of how head lice occurs, the child would had to get it from someone and brought it home.. the house would need to be cleaned with special sprays and the hair washed with special shampoo.

Michelle - posted on 01/19/2010

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lice does not affect only unclean people, it does not matter if you are rich or poor, clean or dirty. In fact it likes clean hair better.
I would talk to my in laws and see if they need help to get rid of the lice in their home. The problem could just be so out of hand that they don't know how to handle it any more.

Kati - posted on 01/19/2010

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I would not allow my child to be around children that have lice. when they hit school age and they see it as a pattern they will call child services and have you investagated.And you knowing there kids have them and still allow your child that can be used against you. If you can't talk to them like an adult and say hey my kid loves your kids but you need 2 deal wit the lice problem and get rid of them i don't want to put my child or the health of my house and the other people in it at risk...

Carmen - posted on 01/19/2010

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Personally, I wouldn't do it because your child may spread it to children outside your home and your inlaws'. I had lice twice as a child and nothing would make me share a hairbrush or article of clothing with another kid again. You may get it next. I would even encourage my in laws to make changes with their situation. If she caught it once she will definitely get it again. Good luck!

September - posted on 01/19/2010

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Well if you don't want her to get lice then I would not let her spend the night. Maybe you could address the issue with the parents of the children who have lice. You could offer to help clean their house, wash bedding, and wash the children’s hair. I think that once your child gets lice and you don't do a good job of cleaning the entire house then they are just going to keep coming back! Maybe they need help getting rid of them?

Amanda - posted on 01/19/2010

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Stay firm. Don't let her stay over the night there. From someone who has been the "lice kid" at school, it's psychologically destructive. I really feel for those kids. She can visit them during the day, but having a sleepover will pretty much garuntee an infestation.

I know in-laws are scary scary people, but see if there is any way you can talk to them about the children's welfare. Maybe invite the cousins over for a few nights and do lice treatments, play hairdressers with them

You are not a dirty neglectful parent, it sounds like the cousins' parents are, however. Maybe later on, if things don't change, you could contact some professional help for them. It might not be neglect, it could be that the parents feel they can't cope.

Anyway, I hope I've helped a bit.

Tiffany - posted on 01/19/2010

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I would not send my child to anyone's house (family or friends) that had lice or were unclean house-wise or body-wise. That is a very sad situation and I think you should talk to them about it. DFACS & CPS remove children on a daily basis from homes like this and the fact that you say they have had lice their whole lives makes me wonder about these people. Are they unfit parents? If so, someone needs to be a voice for these children and get them help. It is not the childrens fault that their parents are nasty. Do these kids go to school? I know your daughter loves her cousins and family is the most important but they have got to take care of this. I would not let her stay there if it were me.

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