due in 3 weeks n wanting to breastfeed but i'm a lil self concious wat should i do ?

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Katelin - posted on 01/19/2010

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I breastfed my first for 12 months. Now I am pregnant for my second and definitely want to nurse again.
I will tell you that it is a tough, demanding job. But it's so worth it. Not only do you bond with your baby but it's so good for them too.
As far as feeling self conscious, you don't have to bare all to everyone. I was modest and discrete with my nursing. After a few weeks when you and your baby become pros, latching is no longer a problem and it's easy to nurse your baby in public possibly without anyone even knowing.
Just give it 3 weeks...get past the hard stuff, and you'll be grateful you stuck it out.
I hope all goes well with your labour/delivery/and post pregnancy.
Take care!!

[deleted account]

You might feel a little different after giving birth. Once you've been in labour and (possibly) pushed a baby out of your vagina, all your inhibitions may fly out the window. Maybe not, but you never know. And please don't feel like you need to hide or cover up for anybody but yourself. If you manage to breastfeed you should be so proud to do it wherever and whenever your baby needs it. It's not something you should be ashamed of. My son is 13 months and still BFing. We have such an incredible bond and I am so thankful that I was able to successfully BF him. I have never used any sort of cover. I think BFing is a beautiful, natural thing and there is absolutely nothing sexual about it.

Brooke - posted on 01/18/2010

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thank u all for ur replys you have helped a great deal its good to get other mothers perspective on it thanks again

Laurice - posted on 01/18/2010

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Talk to a lactation consultant, and dont give up if the baby doesnt take to it right away. I had to stop breastfeeding after only a few days becasue I wasnt roducing enough milk and my daughter would not take to it at all! But I really wish that I had just called a consultant so I would have more support and know that else I could do. Good luck Hope that helps!

Susan - posted on 01/18/2010

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I know the feeling! I was confused and embarrassed but I wanted badly to breastfeed! Support is necessary. If your baby's father is around he can be very helpful. Have him there when you talk to the nurses or a lactation consultant. He will be able to help you after the consultant leaves and the nurses aren't around to position the baby right. The baby should have the whole or most of your areola in it's mouth for a correct latch (a correct latch will help it not hurt so much). Breastfeeding was never painful for me although I know some women have that problem. My main problem in the first few weeks was that he would let go every few minutes and it would take me forever to get him latched on correctly again but it paid off. I wanted so badly to quit those first few weeks but I am so glad I stuck with it!
As for the modesty issue, if you can't go in a private area walmart sells a shawl sort of thing in their baby section specifically as a breastfeeding cover. It has a ring to adjust size and just slips over your head. I liked this b/c I didn't have to worry about it slipping off like a blanket might. Breastfeeding is a very special bond for you to have with your baby and is the best nutrition for him.
I would recommend exclusively breastfeeding for at least the first month in order for your milk to come in well, but if you do bottle feed try to pump when you would have fed your baby. We supplemented with formula so that my husband could feed my son too, but I think for our next baby I will just pump bottles for him to feed instead of having to deal with formula. Stick with it, it is sooo worth it!

[deleted account]

I am extremely self concious too, the only person I was comfortable feeding around was my husband. If we were out somewhere I would have to stop by my sisters house and breastfeed and then go back out and if we had company over I would go into another room. I was so self concious I didn't even try one of those cover up thingys in public, I hated that I was embarassed about it because it was so much of a hassle trying to work around that. I have anxiety too so Im pretty sure that didn't help the matter. But breastfeeding is very awarding and you should do it. It might be something you feel better about after you start it. And after I had my son I think about 20 different nurses saw my "boob" it wasn't even funny. And they even show you how to do it by putting your breast on the babys mouth. I was extremely embarrassed but am so glad I chose to breastfeed that I would go through all of the embarassment over and over again. I wish I wasn't self concious because it is a very beautiful thing, and when you child looks up at you while he/she is feeding it is THE most awesome moment ever.

Amanda - posted on 01/18/2010

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I only breast feed my son for a short time, not for embarssament reasons but for other reasons. If you feel that way when you are breast feeding in public just carry a blanket with you every where you go big enough to cover baby and the upper half of your body. Position baby and cover up then pull up shirt and your ready. It also helps to wear things with buttons and buy breast feeding bras.

Elissa - posted on 01/18/2010

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I have fed anywhere including on trains, on a wall in KFC just because Struan was hungry. The best thing to do is find out if your health authority have breast-feeding workshops - your midwife should be able to tell you. Go to them.

Contact the Breastfeeding Network or La Leche League or another breastfeeding support organisation - they run groups in most areas where you can socialise with other b/fing mums, get advice on latching or engorgment and other problems, and just relax while feeding your baby. I go to a BfN Centre and I love it and struan loves it - and so few places are actively b/fing friendly. Plus older kids see that it is normal too.

The biggest thing that helped me initially was staying an extra night in the hospital - I got one-to-one help from a night shift midwife on different positions, latching and all sorts.

Support is the most important thing. There will be times when you want to give up, if your nipples get cracked or during a growth spurt when you do nothing but feed. At this point people (including health professionals) will tell you well meaning lies such as 'they need more than you can make' or 'it just isn't working for you' and most women give up at these points. The first 12 weeks are the hardest and its no surprise that most women give up in this period. You need the supprt from you family, especially your partner, and your friends.

Its sad I have to say that about the most natural thing in the world but in our culture you have to know you are doing the right thing and stay with it. Formula is fantastic for those who honestly can't breastfeed, but dont fall into peoples easy, quick fix. Once you get over the initial hurdles it is the most wonderful thing in the world. And the endorphin rush means you won give a toss what people think. Good luck x

Danielle - posted on 01/18/2010

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I only breadfed for a month but when we were out, if it was a restraunt I would be sure to sit in the back corner, kinda away from everyone, and face away from everyeone and just cover up with a blanket! I was always thankful when we went to a house because there is always a bedroom you can use!

Yolanda - posted on 01/18/2010

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I live in a house with 4 men and was pretty self-conscious too. I designated a room that was just for nursing and told them not to come in when the door was closed. If I needed to I would use a cover. I also found that nursing bras are a must! I do believe that you will warm up to the idea after you have had your baby...where you cannot possibly remain modest. Get the nurses or midwives to help you nurse, that will help you to get it right and will help you to get over your fears for sure! You also need to know that breastfeeding is very difficult in the beginning. It's painful and can be stressful...but stick with it!! It will be totally worth it in the end! Not all moms can breastfeed so be happy if you can :)

Meggan - posted on 01/18/2010

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One thing that really stuck with me when a midwife was helping was... you need to massage the breast before you start feeding, you do it till milk starts dripping out otherwise the baby cant latch on cause the breast is so tense and full.

Olivia - posted on 01/18/2010

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I was very similar, wasnt quiet sure wat i wanted to do?? sadly the hospital staff were not very helpful after my son was born and did not show me how! it looks quiet easy but dont be fooled some babys will latch on and may come natural, others not.. i found it difficult! a helpful hint they call it the "special k" babys mouth should be in the shape of your index finger and thumb. If it herts at all means baby hasnt quiet latched on so to detach babys mouth from your chest slide your finger in the side of babys mouth to avoid any discumfort. It took a good month before i new wat i was doing and before i was cumfortbal...
( Hope this helps. Good luck!!! )

Alexandra - posted on 01/18/2010

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Key point to breastfeeding - you have to be relaxed when you're doing it. For whatever reason, when mommy is stressed, the milk just won't come. If you do breastfeed, don't get discouraged because your milk won't necessarily come in for a few days. Just keep letting baby nurse, because s/he needs to practice suckling. My milk came in after 4 days, and I was a wreck waiting for it. I thought I was starving my kid.

People tell you that when you have a baby, you lose all modesty, and that's mostly true. If you're having trouble nursing, a lactation consultant or midwife may come into your recovery room and just grab right ahold of your breast. Which might be something to be self-concious about pre-baby, but after you give birth, and you're so exhausted, and all you care about is making sure your baby is taken care of, it doesn't seem like that big of a deal anymore.

The best advice I can give you is to take a deep breath and just try it. Just like anything new, it takes some getting used to. It's uncomfortable at first, physically and perhaps mentally, but just think of it as a wonderful, crazy, beautiful ride into motherhood. Don't give up, It really does get easier with time.

User - posted on 01/18/2010

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i was self concious as well do what you feel comfortable with theres parents rooms at shopping centres and i would also cover myself over, just remember its totally natural dont let anyone make you feel bad about feeding your baby. i had alot of trouble breastfeeding due to the size of my bubs and eventually had to put him on fourmula at first i felt like a falure cause midwives put soo much focus on you have to breast feed but i couldnt do it! so if you feel like its not for you after you try it dont be scared or upset to bottle feed my son is 15m and hes a happy healthy baby

Elize - posted on 01/18/2010

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oh sweetie...you shouldn't be.The bond between you an you baby will be greater than ever..Goodluck

Emily - posted on 01/18/2010

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When you say self conscious, in what regard do you mean? Breast feeding in public, or just general if anyone is around you? When I breast fed while not on my own with the baby, if I didn't feel comfortable around people (eg I wouldn't care if it was my husband around, but say amongst friends) I would cover myself and the baby a little with a baby-cloth, which were also useful to wipe off any excess milk that came out of if the baby spit some out later. I found that to be enough for me really, just to use something to cover up and give a little privacy. If I was outside I would even use my jacket at times, depending on the weather. I also recommend using specific feeding tops/blouses as they make it much easier to breast feed a bit more discreetly, but also much more comfortable than pulling up a normal top.

Meggan - posted on 01/18/2010

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i think most mums-to-be are unsure because its a totally new thing! Theres plenty of info on the Internet and try practicing with a doll or something? just so you get the feeling of how to hold bubby etc also when you in hospital get the midwifes to help you if your struggling! They where a great help with me :) Good luck with the birth and breastfeeding!!

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