Frustrated with weight, husband.......

Jessica - posted on 07/02/2009 ( 25 moms have responded )

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My son was born September 9th.... so it has been almost 10 months and I still have a LOT of weight to lose. I gained 60 pounds!!! I was never tiny to begin with but I got gigantic when I was pregnant. I lost 40 pounds in the first four months, but now I am stuck at my current weight. I want to lose at least 20 more pounds but I'm having a hard time with it.

My husband, he tries to be supportive but it doesn't really work. He tells me I am beautiful but I can't help but think he is telling lies when I look in the mirror! I have stretch marks EVERYWHERE!! And some extra pounds to carry as well! He thinks he is helping when he tells me not to eat certain things but I just want to throw it at him when he says something!!!

I'm so frustrated. I also have medical problems that prevent me from working out sometimes so it is very very hard!!!

Any suggestions!?

25 Comments

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User - posted on 07/09/2009

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oh and your hubby isn't lying he loves you... my husband tells me the same thing and i used to think he was lying because my stomach is covered in strech marks but .... they love US strech mark, weight and all.... so dont get mad ... he just think he is helping

User - posted on 07/09/2009

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When i got pregnant with my 1st child i gain 70 pounds out of the 70 i lost a total 35 pounds n stayed there with my 2nd and 3rd i gain 30 pound with each and lost 40 quickly after the each birth... and since i have never been thin I am now trying to lose at least 15 more pounds... but i can tell you this try to do it healthy way because those lose quick diets dont work the weight comes back plus and extra 10 ... so just be active and eat right ....thats what I'm doing

[deleted account]

WATER!!!! EMPTY CALORIES THAT MAKE YOU FEEL FULL SO YOU EAT LESS!!!! I used to be 215 pounds and cut out sweets and drank a gallon of water a day. 5 months later I weighed 153! I did it all myself. Also, cutting down on soda helps too. Plus it isn't good for your calcium intake and robs your bones of what they need, instead of osteoperosis! GOOD LUCK!!!

Jessica - posted on 07/07/2009

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Walking works. I have done Denise Austin FAT BLASTING YOGA it is a REALLY cheesy DVD but I love it! :) I just feel like I have hit a plateau. Everyone tells me when Dylan starts to walk I'll be chasing him everywhere and I'll lose more weight. :)

Melissa - posted on 07/07/2009

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Go for lots of walks... they help and great deal and its not so much working out... if you need something from the store... walk there instead of driving. Thats what i have been doing and its helped a great deal. I too have a medical condition that doesn't always allow me to work out... so this has been great for me... cause I can take it at my own pace.

Jessica - posted on 07/07/2009

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Thanks everyone! I was not on much after I posted this! You are all so supportive and its nice to know I'm not the only one who is dealing with this!

Someone asked about my medical condition. It's Hidradnitis Supperitiva. I think I spelled it wrong LOL but I get cysts anywhere there are sweat glands. I've had around 10 surgeries all over my body to get them removed. If I get to hot or sweat too much my glands get clogged and I develop painful sometimes golf ball sized cysts. So working out is very challenging especially in Florida. I have my own home gym but its outside so it gets really hot.

My main focus now is on my diet. I'm trying to be more positive when I look in the mirror as well. Its very hard!!!

Megan - posted on 07/03/2009

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I think that it is hard for most women to lose the baby weight. My son is almost 10months old and i have gained it. I work full time and by the time I get home, feed him, and all the other motherly duties I am ready for bed. I finally started seeing a nutritionist around my town and did his diet and actually started to see the weight slowly come off. He made me eat 6 meals a day and have a protein with every meals and atleast 2 green veggies. It was hard at first but after about 2 weeks I started having more energy and I just felt better overall. I also just started P90x!!! You can lose the weight it just may take time!! Best of Luck

Jamie - posted on 07/03/2009

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#1 are you on birth control cause if so thats y you cant shake the extra weight. I was barely 100lbs when I got pregnant and also gained 63lbs during it. I got down to 127 and couldnt get rid of the extra weight. I was eatting nothing but chicken and veggies and working out and it just wouldnt go away. I got of birthcontrol simply because I couldnt find one that worked for us and we just used condoms til I get fixed. I kid you not within 2 months I lost almost all the weight Im now 107. Biggest side affect of BC is weight gain.



#2 I dont think your DH is lying when he says your bueatiful. He just understands that you had a baby so your body has changed and loves it. I have stretch marks too, matter of fact i discovered some new ones yesterday and was grossed out. So I understand where your coming from.



Just enjoy your baby and your DH.

Andrea - posted on 07/03/2009

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I feel ya... I gained about 55 to 60 lbs with my daughter. I lost about 25-30 lbs the first couple pf months but just staled. I started to do yoga and step type exercises but still lost nothing, ugh fustrating. Then my daughter turn one and I have been losing weight. I only have about 15 lbs to go for my weight goal. I really started to lose more weight when she really started to move around and walk (lol now trying to run). Don't get down it will come!!!

For me I always have to tell my husband to back off. Even though he is normaly a great husband and dad with my weight he was always telling me I had to lose weight... He's gained weight too and when he tells me I need to take off some more lbs I asked him when is he DUE and he gets the point that it was mean to say something. So after a few months of that I sat him down told him how I felt and what he says that hurt my feelings and what he says that doesn't hurt my feelings. Now when I get ready to go shopping or out with family he always tells me that I look great and it looks like I lost weight! So I would try to tell him what makes you feel bad and what really helps!

Kimberly - posted on 07/02/2009

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oh and i forgot to reply about the stretch marks, try mederma it really lightens the stretchmarks.

User - posted on 07/02/2009

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i def tried pilates but my c section incision is def not ready for that strain. i threw up everytime from the pain so i stopped. but i just joined a gym and hopefully my weight loss plan will work out for me.

Kimberly - posted on 07/02/2009

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my stomach was really flabby and i did pilates, it made a huge difference! it really helped in terms of tightening my skin on my belly and losing most of the fat, try it if you like it really worked for me

Kimberly - posted on 07/02/2009

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yes i had the same problem when my son was 1 yrs old i was stuck, but i read in a women's health magazine that if you eat lowfat yogurt 3 times a day it'll help get rid of belly fat, so i tried it and i lost alot of weight not only in my belly but overall. i also cut out junk food, cake, cookies, and ice cream for a few months. i did exercise also but not that much i did cardio.

Marcia - posted on 07/02/2009

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I'm uncertain of your medical condition, but I support Nicole's post...yoga is awesome (my sister does it). I like pilates...I just do it in 20 minute intervals and it does wonders for your tummy....
with your medical condition could it also be an issue with your thyroid? You might want your doctor to check it out...if it is your thyroid perhaps there is a program he can refer you to. I know of a person who found out she had something wrong with her thyroid and luckily she got into a program that assisted with this issue and loosing weight.
I still have weight that I would love to loose...my issue though is consistency. I would love to be able to exercise consistently.

Nicole - posted on 07/02/2009

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yoga is vey low impact you can have a go at it. I love yoga because it is so easy to fit in with baby naps and you can turn it into mom baby exercise too. On the stretch mark front, my boyfriend go more than I did with my pregnancy. Heh he gained more weight than I did. ROFLCOPTERs. They do fade albeit slowly- I started the whole cocoa butter business again and it is helping too.

Rebecca - posted on 07/02/2009

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My husband used to be the same way and I just told him that I appreciate the support he thinks he's giving me, but that it was making me feel worse. I'm sure he is sincere when he tells you you are beautiful because you are. Just be honest with him about your feelings and it will all work itself out in the wash

Charlie - posted on 07/02/2009

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i put on heaps of weight when preggers , and am also covered in stretch marks i joined weight watchers and lost 20 kilos ( dont know what that is in pounds ) i still would like to lose 15 more kilos but the last lot is always the hardest part.

Michelle - posted on 07/02/2009

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I stopped smoking while i was pregnant so replaced my fags with food and unfortunatly for me i worked at a subway and if you have ever had a freshly cooked subway cookie then you will understand why i ate about 6 a day to substitute the cigs. I gained 70 pounds during my pregnancy, my daughter is now 7 months old and ive only lost 20 as ive found it so hard to cut back on my food intake as my body is so used to being fed. I also have awful stretchmarks on my belly, hips, legs and thighs. I hate my body and havnt looked at it in the mirror for months and i also know my husband hates it even though he would never admit it to me. Im now on a cereal diet, bowl of kellogs for breakfast, a cereal bar mid morning a bowl of kellogs for lunch then another cereal bar mid afternoon and a healthy tea in the evening. Ive lost 5lbs this week so it working. Good Luck and ur not alone cos there are plenty of real women out there like you. Oh forgot to say, you have the cereal with skimmed milk and can only drink water altho i still have my coffee in the morning.

User - posted on 07/02/2009

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i feel u. i lost all my baby weight during delivery no joke all 40 lbs of it. but then a month later i started birth control and my weight exploded and so i stopped using it and am still struggling withthe weight. just cant figure out the best way to lose it.

Amber - posted on 07/02/2009

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I felt exactly like you after having my son. I gained 60 pounds or probably more. I felt so sad. I started to do little work- outs 6 weeks after postpardum. I did sit ups, push-ups and squats while baby was napping, nothing too time consuming. I always ate a lot of yogurt-like those yoplait lights. They are delicious and yogurt is such a good food. It has protein low carbs, no fat, low cals. I managed to lose the baby weight, but still don't like my body because of the stretch marks EVERYWHERE and loose skin on my tummy. But on the bright side my son thinks my tummy is hilarious. I think when we get pregnant we have to kiss our old bodies goodbye and grow to like our new bodies. :) Now, I walk with my son when it's not too hot out. I bought some of those "shape-up" shoes from Sketchers and they really help. Walking is a fun excersize and you can go with other moms too and chat and the babies get a nice relaxing ride in the stroller. Good luck and believe your husband when he tells you you are beautiful! :)

LeeAnn - posted on 07/02/2009

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I am still struggling to lose my baby weight too. With my oldest I gained 77 lbs. I lost 40 of that, and then SURPRISE!!! I was pregnant again, and my oldest is only 8 months... I didn't gain as much the second time, only the 40 that I had just lost!!! I am still nursing, and have lost back to where I was before my second pregnancy. I am still about 37 lbs away from what I was before any babies....I want to lose the rest, but get sooo hungry late in the evening, and have a hard time cutting out the cokes. (I did for a while, and lost to where I am now.) I switched to coke zero, which still tastes better than diet, and after a little bit you don't notice any difference at all, unless you drink a regular coke. My husband is very supportive, and doesn't tell me what not to eat, he is struggling with his weight as well. As far as stretch marks, we both have them....at first it was hard to deal with, but now I think of it like a small trade off for my girls. They have faded some, and aren't that bad, until in swimwear like previously mentioned. Keep your spirits up...your husband married you because he loves you, and wants to make a life with you. You have given him one of life's greatest gifts by giving him a child. Just remember that, and I think things will get better for you, Good Luck!

Kelly - posted on 07/02/2009

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Have you tried the Acai berry diet??? I havent but am going to the health store today to see what they have to say about it.....i have read that as long as it is pure acai berry than you will have better results.......to research it all i did was go to google.com and then just surched for Acai Berry and lots of results came up.....good luck....i am also still trying to loose the baby weight, my son is not 7 months old.....and i would like to lose about 30-50 pounds, but only about 15 is still baby weight......

Ashley - posted on 07/02/2009

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I stopped eating properly after I finished nursing, thought I looked great, got hospitalized for ectopic pregnancy, couldn't eat because I may need surgery, lost more weight... when I finally got home and looked in the mirror, I realized how dumb I had been all those yrs... I started eating what I wanted, when I wanted, and just tried my best to make it healthy most of the time, and my weight has finally settled to what it seems like my body is ok with... just goes to show, what you think you want, is not always what your body needs... As for your husband, stop asking him!!! LOL He will always say you are beautirul, lie or no lie... I though my husband was saying those thing just to stay out of trouble till I realized unless I gain like 100lbs, he actually doesn't care that much. The stretchmarks will never go away, I just had to come to terms with them...after a couple yrs they fade a little, and they kind of become an afterthought that you only really think about when you picking out bathing suits, and it could always be worse, I had two c-sections and have a huge flap on my belly, stretchmarks don't seem so bad compared to that... lol.

Deborah - posted on 07/02/2009

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i am also trying to drop the last 15 lbs of baby weight,things like cutting out soda and eating small portions throughout the day have helped me lose weight. baby weight isnt the easiest weight to lose but it can be done. also, weight watchers has a program designed for postpartum woman. good luck! i hope i helped at least a little.

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