Having another at 25 with a 7 year old and stepdaughter thats 2

Danielle - posted on 01/01/2013 ( 9 moms have responded )

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Im struggling ... My 7 year old god bless him for who he has made me today but lets face it at 17 , that was no planned pregnancy. I grew up so quick and I love every minute of being a mom. and I mean every minute. It's what I do I actually have the nickname from friends and family as super mom. I do crafts everyday , cook dinner everyday, read to them everyday , play and decorate and so many more things including being an extreme couponer ( I'm busy you could say) . plus I work full time at a hospital as a district manager and I have been with the company for 7 years. Me and my soon to be husband *Getting married on Aug 10th 2013 have our own 4 bedroom house , nice cars and are pretty well to do. But I feel something missing like I said dont get me wrong I love Spencer and Kholie my stepdaughter but I never enjoyed that moment of pregnancy at 17 nobody really wants to celebrate that although I was very happy, Its clearly not the joy I'd feel now. I want that feeling and to have and to hold a newborn and be pregant and wear cute clothes and people touch my belly and say I glow. Am I out of my mind?

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Tracy - posted on 01/04/2013

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I have learned to completely embrace the phrase "man plans and god laughs". I had my son at 17. Married my hubby (not the bio father) when my son was 4 and inherited four step-children all older than my own. I loved my pregnancy with my son and never let anyone get me down about being pregnant. But that still doesn't mean people were supportive (my parents were, but that's not the same as a loving and supportive partner who wants to coo over everything too). When I tried to share things with the bio father such as "the baby just moved for the first time!! feel it!!" (we were together until my son was 11 months old - but it was a bad time) well, his response was always "that's what babies do!" in a rude voice. So I always dreamed of having another child and having a loving spouse run out in the middle of the night for ice cream, having him lay his head on my belly and talk to the baby, going to appointments and awing over little fingers and guessing boy or girl, and wearing all the maternity clothes and have people NOT afraid to address me because they were unsure how to approach the situation. The whole giant shebang! My hubby and I had infertility problems for 8 years and nothing would fix the situation. I cried all the time at babies and finally became hardened and had to tell myself that whole world didn't exist for me.

Then so unexpectedly that I swore it was cancer that turned the stick positive, we were pregnant! We now have our gorgeous and stubborn three year old daughter. The pregnancy was everything I hoped for (of course, you can never know what you'll get or what health problems might occur, but we were lucky). My hubby was loving and supportive to the point I sometimes had to NOT lay down because he was right there with his head on my belly. LOL, I loved every minute but it did get annoying! We have both been so in awe of this little miracle we thought would never happen.

So, after taking up all this time with my little story, my advice to you is if you are both on board, then chase it with all you've got!! Of course, don't do it just for the pregnancy experience, but that's a major bonus, right? I think it sounds like your family is ready for a new little one... :)

Amanda - posted on 01/03/2013

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Absolutley not. Have you talked to your husband about the way you feel?. If you feel like you want another baby, go for it. Being financialy ready, you seem to have that. I would get married first, enjoy your honeymoon and at least 6mths to a year with your new husband. Hope this helps :)

Deanna - posted on 01/03/2013

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As a person who hated pregnancy (both times) I say you are!! Lol, not in a bad way. I love hold newborn babies. If you feel you are financially and emotionally ready. Talk to hubby to be about thinking of trying for a baby. I do suggest you wait until after the wedding. Being nauseous and all that no fun stuff on your wedding day is not fun. Wait until after you get married. Get the family ready first. Ask what hubby says first.

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Amanda - posted on 01/04/2013

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I personaly loved being pragnet both time. Now my 2nd pragncey was VERY rough & I spent most of the 1st 6mons in the hospital. But I still loved feeling my daughter growing inside of me. And I loved holding her & watching her as a new born. My girls are now 10yrs & 8 yrs old I still love them & love spending time with them but at times I wish I could have another baby. I had 2 have an operation done when I was 24 & I can't have any more children. If u can support another child & ur family wants another child then go 4 it. My only worries about another child would be the point that the world we live in seems 2 be. With all the school/public shootings & things like that. But if u & ur family want another baby then go 4 it. Also I agree that nothing in life ever seems 2 turn out how u planed 4 it 2. I love my life & woulndt change a thing about it. But it's not even close 2 the life I planed.

Ashley - posted on 01/01/2013

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that's too cute. and i am glad he is excited about it. you are right about nothing turning out how you plan it, i know mine isnt anything how i planned, but i love it and wouldnt change a thing about it.

Danielle - posted on 01/01/2013

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My son is all for it. How about this his teacher called me to congratulate me . I had no idea what she was talking about . Here everytime my son would draw me he would make me pregnant. I laughed and asked him why and he said because you need another baby so you stop treating me like one. Mommy Im big and I can take care of myseld. Almost broke my heart but laughed at him because he's so silly and If you could hear the voice he says it in ..classic.. Thanks for your support , Im scared but ready . Its crazy how you plan your whole life when your young and it turns out nothing like that.

Ashley - posted on 01/01/2013

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no, you are not out of your mind. you are still young, and it seems you are a great mom and able to support your family, so why not have another baby? if that is what you want, then go for it. i was also a new mom at 17, now 26, with a 9 year old, 7 year old, 2 year old, and 3 year old stepdaughter. explain to your son that you want another baby, and see what he thinks about having a little brother or sister. you need to include him in all of this, as well as your step daughter. let them help pick out things for the baby, and fell your belly, and things like that, so they dont feel left out and get jealous. good luck.

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